


Fires From Heaven

by guardian_of_jupiter



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood-centric, F/M, Hurt Alec, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Hurt/Comfort, Lightwood Dynamic, M/M, Parabatai Bond, Protective Alec Lightwood, Protective Jace Wayland, Protective Magnus Bane, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-04-06 10:26:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 81,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14054922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/guardian_of_jupiter/pseuds/guardian_of_jupiter
Summary: Alexander Lightwood is no stranger to pain and hardship. But this time, he may well be over his head. His relationship with Magnus Bane is in indecisive mode and now, a mysterious ailment afflicted him. As the Shadowhunters together with Magnus Bane race against the time to unravel the mysteries of the events befell Alec, Alec and Magnus take the time to learn to fall in love again.Set after Season 2.





	1. Take a step back and rediscover him all over again.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first Shadowhunters fanfic that I wrote. I have read the book up until City of Glass and have watched Shadowhunters (TV), which I am guiltily liking it more than the books (sorry!). However, I am fairly new to the fandom, so, pardon if there is any glaring OOC-ness.
> 
> Also, I wrote the whole story before the commencement of Season 3. If there is any similarity, it is not intentional, merely coincidental.
> 
> Reviews, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated.

 

* * *

_It was the day that I discover,_

_Physical attraction lasts just for a short time;_

_The only thing that will make it forever,_

_Is that I know your worst and you know mine._

_Together we agree the love we begin,_

_Can only last if we discover each other all over again;_

_And built a friendship as a foundation,_

_To an everlasting loving connection_.

* * *

 

“I don’t think that I can live without you,” Alec confessed. His hazel eyes went liquid as the words slipped out of his mouth – raw and honest.

Alec had spent the night tossing around in his bed, thinking about that night when he sincerely thought he had lost everyone he loved. He had lost Magnus due to the burden of his responsibilities and he had lost Jace, however briefly it was. The pain from his _parabatai_ rune was real. The physical pain was bad enough to render him to his knees, but it was how his soul felt as if it had been ripped out that hurt him the most. Alec knew, regardless what Jace and Clary said, he had lost Jace. They could lie to him all they want but he knew Jace was dead.

And that was it. Alec could handle physical pain. But the pain for losing people he loved... he couldn’t handle that. He might look gruff, cold and untouchable but once his heart had loved someone, it was unfathomably deep and indescribably soul-consuming.

Alec didn’t give his heart easily but when he did, he didn’t know how to do it half-way.

Right now, standing in front of Magnus in the alley, Alec remembered painfully the way Magnus had broken up their relationship, citing how their duties were crippling their ability to form a lasting relationship. At that moment, Alec knew that he loved Magnus more than Magnus had loved him because Alec couldn’t even contemplate of giving up Magnus for any kind of reason - he would fight first with his blood, tears and soul before ever letting Magnus go.

And it should not have come as a surprise. He had 17,000 past lovers to compete whereas Magnus was his first of... everything and Alec knew that he was just another lover in Magnus’s long list of conquests.

Maybe that was why Magnus found it easy to just walk away from them. What was Alec but merely an insignificant moment in the warlock’s countless memories? Magnus’s decision to walk away had _hurt_ him because it confirmed Alec’s deepest insecurity - that he, as himself, was not enough to make Magnus stay. And then, as if Magnus added more salt in his open, bleeding heart, the warlock had shown to Alec how _easily_ it was to shut him out - to discard him out of Magnus’s life.

That hurt Alec even worse. In a way that Alec didn’t know it could hurt. Alec didn’t think that he could feel that kind of hurt again and not _die._

Alec saw Magnus open his mouth to reply to Alec’s admission but he quickly raised his hand slowly to stop any words from escaping Magnus’s lips. He needed to say what he had planned to say before Magnus ensnared him with his bewitching words. So, he continued, “You have no idea how hard it was for me to not tell you about the Soul Sword. I was torn between trying to be a leader of the Institute and trying to be your lover. And I am so, so sorry for making a wrong decision – for ever hurting you. It was never my intention to do that. Having said that...” Alec halted.

Alec swallowed hard. His heart was at his throat and his chest drummed painfully. “...Having said that... I have been thinking what you said about us...” He waved his trembling hands between them. “...about not being able to be a leader while we are in a relationship.”

“Alexander, what I said before…” Magnus said softly, taking a step forward to plead his case. Magnus bit his lips when he saw Alec take a step back, unconsciously defending himself. Hurt on Alec’s face was clear and Magnus had expected that. But what had caused Magnus’s heart to pound loudly was the unexpected fear in Alec’s eyes.

“No,” Alec hurried on. “You were right.”

“No, I am not.” Magnus placed his hands out towards Alec.

“Magnus, please.” Alec shook his head. “If we do this again and... and something else comes up. I don’t think I can feel this kind of pain again. Not again.”

Then, words came down like a waterfall. “You are my first, Magnus. I have not loved anyone before you and all my memories of being in love is all about you, whereas I share my small place in your heart with thousands of your past lovers. You- you filled my heart totally. And when you chose to end us…” Alec stuttered. “…Can you understand my pain, Magnus?”

Magnus wished that he could take back all the vicious words and actions that he had committed in the past weeks. He had lived for so long that he had forgotten that Alec was still tentatively manoeuvring his way. Alec had seemed so tall and capable that Magnus often forgot how… _innocent_ … Alec was, even amid war and conspiracy. Right now, Alec’s face and words were tearing the warlock apart.

Alec took another step backwards, trying to back away from the pain. “I… I can’t. With you. Not again.”

Magnus was sure he could hear his own heart broke as his breath was lodged in his throat. The fear on Alec’s face was palpable. Magnus never thought that Alec would fear _him_ out of all the people in world. _What have I done?_ Tears gathered in his eyes. _How could I have pushed Alexander so far away?_ The tears were not only for himself but also for Alec, whom he had unknowingly hurt so deep that Alec was now scared of even coming close to him.

“Please, darling…” Magnus whispered. “Please…”

Those were the words that Alec had said when Magnus ended them, and Alec remembered the hurt he felt clearly when Magnus turned around and walked away. And how each time they had met on the opposite side of the war, the hurt intensified. Unconsciously, he raised his hand to clutch at his chest, willing the tightness to loosen.

He simply couldn’t breathe.

“I’m sorry, Magnus, but I… I can’t.” Alec willed his voice to speak. By Angels, even now, Magnus’s presence hurt him. Who knew love could hurt this much?

“Alexander…” Magnus tried again. But Alec just shook his head before turning around to run.

“Alexander!”

Oh God… what had he done? Magnus ran his hands through his hair in utter despair. What had he DONE? He was hurting at Alec’s lie and so, he had viciously hurt Alec back. And his Alexander, sweet Alexander, had let him hurt him again and again. When he ended them, it was a mean to hurt Alec back just as Alec had hurt him. When he chose the Seelie Queen, turning away from Alec’s pleading words, he forced himself to think only of his clan. He forced himself out of his own heart that insisted him to reach out back to Alec.

He was supposed to be the more experience one. He was supposed to be the wiser one. How could being in love with Alec reduced his supposed wisdom into childish tantrum?

When Alec left Lydia in the middle of his wedding to kiss him, the young Shadowhunter had put his fragile trust in Magnus. He was trusting Magnus to lead him through the chaos that would surely come through.

Right now, Magnus wasn’t sure he was worthy of that trust anymore.

 

* * * * *

 

It was bright, early morning when Isabelle walked in her brother’s room without knocking. There he was, as usual, staring blankly out of his window. “Alec?”

Alec shook himself out of whatever daydream/nightmare he was in before turning around to face his sister. “Yeah, Izzy? What’s up?” The cool demeanour was back up.

Isabelle forced herself to refrain from shaking her brother and demanding him stop pretending in front of her. It had been two months after the party, which they had celebrated for Valentine’s demise, and ever since then, Alec was functioning in automated form. Alec had never said anything about what had happened at the party, but Isabelle had always known her brother more than he had known himself. Judging by the lack of Magnus around the Institute and the way Alec’s phone vibrated insistently without Alec answering it, Isabelle had a pretty good idea where Alec and Magnus stood now.

When they were children, growing up in the Institute, Alec and Isabelle were pretty much kept to themselves. Being the only children there, Isabelle had loved playing with her introvert sibling. Alec was a year older than her, but Isabelle had always been fiercely protective about her brother.

Isabelle remembered when Alec was eight and she was seven, they were both playing in a park around a small pond. But something had happened that Isabelle couldn’t really remember the detail. But all that she could remember was she fell into the pond. It was cold and dark, and she couldn’t breathe. The next thing she knew was Alec pulling her out of the pond. It was Alec’s expression that she remembered the most - white and unyielding. Something had changed that day because Alec had refused to go anywhere near open water if he didn’t need to.

It was then that Isabelle knew.

Alec loved quietly but oh, so, so fiercely. But when he had been burned by the same love, Alec shut down and hid himself away.

If that was what happening between Magnus and Alec, Isabelle knew Alec was reacting to the hurt the same way he reacted to her being drowned so many years ago - Alec was pulling himself away from the pain.

Isabelle’s heart ached for her shy, introvert brother.

“Izzy?” Alec frowned at his sister’s silence.

Isabelle sniffed quietly before straightening her back and looked straight at Alec. “We have a situation. It appears that there is a horde of demon in an abandoned building downtown.”

“Okay, I’ll be right there,” Alec replied. Just before Isabelle turned around Alec reached for her shoulder and said softly. “But you are alright, right?”

Isabelle smiled readily at her brother. These were the times where Isabelle was amazed at her brother’s love for her. Even he was clearly hurting, he cared more about her than himself.

“Yes, I am,” she said as she reached for his hand on her shoulder, squeezing it tight. “But I wish that you are.”

Alec stiffened as he opened his mouth to defend himself.

Isabelle shook her head, “No, don’t deny it, Alec. And I also know you’re not ready to say anything to me. But I’ll wait until you’re ready.”

Alec looked away, feeling eerily exposed in front of his sister.

“Come on, big brother!” Isabelle said brightly, diffusing the tense atmosphere. “We have demons to kill. How is that ever not fun?” Alec smiled gratefully before following his sister out.

Within one hour, he walked with Isabelle and Jace followed closely by Clary as they reached their destination. It felt good to be out and about with his family - even with Clary tagging along. Alec had learned to be accustomed with the redhead’s presence; he had even learned to be comforted by it.

Ever since Magnus closed the portal, the New York Shadowhunters had been dealing with an increase in demonic activities. Their job had gotten a little bit more difficult as the demons that came out from Edom were different than the demons that they were usually dealing.  Not only the demons were faster but, by Angel, the stench and potency of the demons’ ichor were nauseating.

“Just once I would like a mission that is not dealing with these demons from Edom,” Jace complained.

“Oh, stop complaining, Jace.” Isabelle playfully pushed Jace’s shoulder. “At least, with Vampire and Werewolves currently at truce now, we have more time off than usual. Who cares if there’s an occasional demon mission to deal with.”

“It’s the only good thing coming out of the whole Valentine mess.” Clary chimed in.

Alec snorted. “You can say that again.”

Jace glanced back at his _parabatai_. “Remind me again why the Head of Institute joined this mission?”

“To keep you and Clary out of trouble.” Alec replied drily, without missing a beat. “Izzy can only control one of you and your wild impulses.”

Isabelle smirked while Jace looked at Alec cockily. “Admit it, Alec. You miss fighting alongside me.”

Alec recalled the pain on his _parabatai_ rune when Jace died. Looking straight into Jace’s eyes, Alec replied quietly. “Maybe I’ve learned to stop taking things for granted.” And with that, Alec walked along.

Jace bit his lips as he looked at Alec’s back.

“He is still shaken up at that time when he thought you were dead.” Isabelle offered.

“I thought two months is more than enough time to get over this.” Jace frowned. More than anything, he hated to see his _parabatai_ hurting.

“You should have seen the pain Alec was in when his rune burned. I have never heard Alec cried like that.” Isabelle said. “Give him time, Jace. Maybe him following us to missions is how he cope with the shock.”

“Yeah, okay.” Jace exchanged troubled look with Clary. They both shared the guilt of keeping what happened at Lake Lyn a secret.  

“Hey!” Alec’s voice echoed throughout the empty building. “Come here guys!”

All three of them hurried towards Alec. There in front of Alec, were several demons. Their winged backs were wide, and Alec had already drawn his bow.

“Shit…” Jace cursed under his breath as he quickly drew his Seraph Blade. Behind him, he heard the snapping sound of Isabelle’s whip.

With a snarl, Jace leaped into the battle, followed loyally by Clary. The four young Shadowhunters quickly fell into the rhythms that they had known so well. With Alec providing cover from behind, Jace and Clary engaging into the close combat and Izzy sweeping across strayed demons with her long and sharp whip.

It had been so easy and familiar. Alec didn’t know how much he had missed this.

During the snap-snap of his arrows hitting the target one by one, suddenly, Alec felt something descending upon him.

Something heavy and smothering.

It pushed him onto the ground. Alec fell to his knees and had to release his bow as he braced his fall. His surprise cries were choked behind his throat.

 _What the hell?! What the hell on me?!_ Alec thought as he thrashed wildly.

The force pushed him further forward and down. In seconds, Alec’s chest was pressed against the floor, restricting his breathings. He couldn’t turn his head around to see that what had sat on him. All he could do was fighting to draw in breath by breath as the _thing_ above him pushed him further down.

His vision greyed as he fought to push himself away. He tried calling for Jace, but he could see his siblings and Clary were busy fending off swarming demons that they were not aware of his predicaments. Just as he thought that he might pass out, the force that had been pushing his back was now travelling towards his head, forcefully pushing _something_ into his head.

And Alec was introduced to a whole new definition of pain.

 _...By Angel!_ Alec squeezed his eyes close. The pain was so loud and distracting. He had never felt something like this before in his whole life. He couldn’t handle this!

“Jace…” Alec gasped. His hands jerked around trying to grab something - anything - so he could push whatever was above him.

“Jace…” The pain in his head intensified. The thing above him was relentless. Whatever that was pushing into his head had felt hot and heavy. The energy that was slithering through his brain was too much for him to handle.

Alec felt something tickled down his from his nose - warm and coppery. It was too much. The energy inside his head was too much. Alec opened his mouth one last time.

_“JACE!”_

 

* * * * *

 

When it was clear that Alec wouldn’t pick up his call, Magnus had spent a week wallowing in self-hatred. He spent the week drinking his sorrow away, before Catarina had come and beat some sense down to him.

“You claim that he is the best thing that had happened to you!” Catarina had yelled. “Then, do something about that, damn it! You are High Warlock of Brooklyn and not some hopeless love-sick mundane. Fight for him!”

Ang then, she threw all his expensive alcohols away - in which Magnus didn’t think he had quite forgiven her; some were rare and hideously expensive - and left Magnus to sober up and… well… think.

It was hard to teach himself to let Alec go, not when every inch of his loft reminded of the brief time they were together. Alec had claimed that he only occupied a small part of Magnus heart; the heart that he claimed he had shared together with 17,000 other ghosts. In some way, Alec was right. But also, in other way that mattered, Alec was wrong.

Alec was wrong to think that Magnus didn’t love him as much as he did.

Magnus had lived for a long time. He had strings of lovers longer than any other person on the Earth - in exception of Camille, perhaps. He was after all, as the Clave described, a hedonistic and greedy person. But Alec’s innocence, blunt honesty and penchant to love someone so fiercely were something Magnus hadn’t known in his long life.

They were intoxicating and addictive. There was nothing Magnus could do but to chase after the dark-haired Shadowhunter, who had a self-esteem of a child.

Magnus was in the pursuit of Alec’s affection, but he was taken aback by Alec’s love.

To be loved in return was the greatest gift that Alec had given him. It was the way Alec had turned back to him and said he didn’t care about Magnus’s past. It was the way his eyes brightened with wonder when he first saw Magnus’s real eyes. It was the way he presented a gift to him just because Alec was thinking about him.

And somewhere along that, Magnus had fallen deeply in love with Alec. It was a love like none other. It was something new, even for an old player like him. Alec made him feel like a new person.

So, of course only a love like that could cause him to react so badly like he did when he found out Alec had lied to him. It was the demon side of him that caused him to inflict the vengeance. Words could not describe how Magnus hated himself for succumbing to his demon side.

And so, surrounded by the memories of Alec in this loft, Magnus sat in the dark, thinking of ways to soothe Alec’s hurt and more important, his fear of letting Magnus near him. Because that was what hurt Magnus the most - the fact that Alec feared him.

His phone chimed loudly and he cursed, startled.

He groped around to search for his phone. When he saw Isabelle’s name on the screen, Magnus’s chest thundered - heart in his throat. The Lightwoods had been quiet for two months. There were no jobs for him; no calling to straighten the wards, no requests to close any portal and no spells that needed to be undone. Magnus was under impression that he was no longer welcome to the Institute.

But now, the word _Isabelle_ was flashing through his screen. He knew that it couldn’t be anything good. Swallowing hard, Magnus answered, fully expecting Isabelle to rip him a new one. Which, he entirely deserved. “Isabelle…?”

At first, Magnus thought the line was cut off as only silence greeted him. He looked back at his phone, frowning and saw that it was still connected. Then, he heard Isabelle’s soft sniff.

 _Oh God… No…_ Magnus thought as he stood up abruptly. Blood drained off his face. _Oh please, no…_

“Isabelle… What is it? Is Alexander...?” Magnus halted; his hands were shaking and his heart pounded in dread.

“Oh Magnus…” Isabelle stuttered, the tears made her voice sounded thick. “We don’t know. Nothing we do works!”

“I’m coming, Isabelle.” Magnus needed no more words. He disconnected and opened a portal directly to the Institute’s front door.

 

* * * * *

 

“What happened?” Magnus asked at Isabelle. He could see Jace pacing back and forth and Clary was quiet and pale.

Isabelle’s mascara was ruined. Her face was pale and drawn. “Three days ago, we were in a mission to eradicate a small group of demons. And it went fine! Even though they were Edom’s Demons, we had handled them before and it went fine.” Isabelle wrapped her arms around herself.

“Three days ago…? Why only now did you call me...” Magnus startled. Then he narrowed his cat eyes. “What happened, Isabelle?”

“That’s it!” Jace threw his hands in agitation. “We don’t know what happened!”

“We were fighting the demon and Alec stayed behind, like he usually was. One minute he was covering us with arrows and the next thing we knew, Alec cried Jace’s name.” Clary provided. Worry was clearly in her eyes.

“When we turned around, we saw Alec was face-down on the ground. The ground around him cracked and there was blood coming out of his nose.” Isabelle wiped her face tiredly. “He was unconscious, even an _Iratz_ could not revive him, so Jace carried him back to Institute.”

“But…” Magnus frowned.

“And that was three days ago.” Isabelle interrupted. “We have checked. There’s nothing physically wrong with him. But nothing we do or try ever seems to work. Alec is not waking up.”

Magnus’s lips were pressed into a straight line. Isabelle could see the fact that Alec had remained unconscious for three days without any apparent reasons worried him. “I want to see him.” Magnus demanded.

Isabelle nodded her head and watched Magnus march rigidly into the Infirmary.

“I hope Magnus can do something.” Jace said.

“Yeah…” Isabelle hugged herself tight. “I just wish that we aren’t asking Magnus for a favour. Not after we have been silent for two months.”

“Alec never said a word,” Clary said softly. “But anyone who knows him well know that things didn’t end well between Magnus and him. It seems cruel to ask for Magnus when we know it will hurt them both.”

Jace unconsciously raised his hand to cover his _parabatai_ rune. Alec was heartbroken. Jace could feel the pain within his soul. And he had been angry at Magnus for making Alec feel this way; angry at Alec for being so goddamn stoic and unbreakable in front of him. Had Alec forgotten with whom he was trying to pretend - he shared Alec’s soul damn it!

“I want badly for things to work out between them,” Isabelle look at the doorway that Magnus had just passed a few seconds ago. “Why does it have to be so hard?”

Jace opened his mouth to reply but realised that there was nothing he could say without being angry at Magnus. He was being irrational and biased, he knew. But Magnus was not here when Alec had spent nights hitting the punching bag until his knuckles bleed. He was not here when Alec had spent hours on the rooftop, not caring about the cold - just staring into nothingness. He was certainly not here when Alec had subtly flinched and whitened when somebody was asking about Magnus.

 _He_ was.

He was there to pull Alec away from the punching bag and to spread healing salve on his knuckles. He was there to pull Alec into a silent hug when he found Alec on the rooftop. Alec didn’t say a word, didn’t shed any tear nor did he return the hug. He was there to see Alec visibly gathering his shield, straightening his back - stoicism in his back and determination on his face.

Jace knew that it was only a matter of time before the emotion would flood through Alec’s shield and when it did, Jace knew Alec would crash and burn.

But instead of saying anything, Jace walked towards the Infirmary. Isabelle looked after the blond-haired man as her heart ached for Jace too. She could only imagine how it felt to be Jace as he watched his other soul destroying himself.  

When Jace arrived at Infirmary, he saw the warlock’s hands were poised on top of Alec’s motionless body and a bright, bluish magic flowed into Alec. Jace moved closer to the bed, willing a miracle to happen; that Alec would suddenly wake up.

Alec’s face was dusted with stubbles. The black rune on his neck looked stark against his pale skin. His lips were chapped and the cheekbones look a bit more prominent than it should have. Jace made a mental note to shave Alec’s face later. He knew how uncomfortable Alec was with facial hair.

After a few minutes, Magnus clenched his hands into fists and the blue light vanished. He let out a sigh.

“Well?” Jace asked. His hand sneaked down to grasp his _parabatai_ ’s hand. The simply touch grounded him.

“Are you sure you don’t know what caused this?” Magnus asked.

Jace shook his head. “Whatever happened, it had happened fast.”

“Tell me in detail.”

Jace paused. “We were fighting the demons. Everyone of us took our usual position. Alec stayed behind us, providing cover to any strayed demons. I guess we were all too focused to be really aware of what happened to Alec because the next thing I knew, I heard Alec screamed my name.” Jace closed his eyes painfully. “And then I saw Alec lying face down on the ground.”

“Tell me about the ground around Alec. Were there any distinctive claw marks or any type of weapons? Any clue at all?” Magnus pressed.

“I…” Jace frowned. He closed his eyes, trying to remember. “There was this weird mark on the ground - it looked like a scorched mark.”

“Demon’s scorched mark?”

“I… I am not sure. I mean I have seen numerous demon’s scorched marks. This looked strange. Instead of black, the scorched mark had red-oranges tinted on it. And it didn’t emit any smell of sulphur.”

“What?” Magnus frowned. He had never heard of that.

“So, what did you find out?” Jace asked instead.

“Nothing.” Magnus started to pace worriedly. “I’ve checked his vitals, there is nothing wrong with him. He is perfectly healthy. There is no reason for him for not waking up.”

Jace’s lips thinned in unchecked panic. If Magnus couldn’t find what was wrong with Alec, Jace didn’t think that anyone else could. What scared him the most was the way his _parabatai_ rune felt numb. It felt as if Alec was shielded from him. Silently he sat on Alec’s bed; his hips pressed against Alec’s side. He leaned forward to cup Alec’s face between his hands and he touched his forehead to Alec’s. “Come back to me, Alec…” he whispered, swallowing his grief hard. “Come back.”

Magnus stopped pacing and watched the _parabatai_ partners in a quiet manner. When Alec and he started dating, the _parabatai_ partnership was a lot to take in. If Magnus hadn’t known Shadowhunters’ way for as long as he had, he would have long ago succumbed to jealousy at Jace and Alec’s bond. But Magnus knew that even if Jace shared Alec’s soul, Magnus held Alec’s heart.

 _Used to hold Alexander’s heart._ Magnus reminded himself viciously. _I may never have Alexander’s heart ever again._

Magnus sat heavily on the nearest chair, burying his face in his hands. He was at his wits’ end. If they couldn’t ascertain what attacked Alec, Magnus didn’t know where to start healing him.

In the depth of his grief, Magnus automatically reached out his hand to grasp Alec’s limp hand. He just wanted to feel Alec’s warm hands; the very hand that he had not touched for far too long. He wanted to be grounded with the fact that even if Alec was not waking up, he was still alive and here and unhurt.

 _Wake up, darling._ He thought fervently. _Wake up so I can properly seduce you all over again._

With Jace’s head touching his forehead and Magnus’s hand tightly holding his, Alec suddenly let out a shuddering breath. His body jolted slightly as if something that had been missing was finally slotted in. The movement unexpected movement caused Jace to jerk his head back and Magnus to abruptly stand up. They looked at each other in utter disbelief before crowding into Alec.

“Alec, come on buddy, wake up.” Jace whispered urgently.

“Darling?” Magnus carded his fingers through Alec’s messy hair. “Alexander?”

Alec’s breathing quickened as both eyelids fluttered in an attempt to open his eyes. Feeling amazed, both Magnus and Jace held their breath back as a pair of hazel eyes slowly made an appearance. Dazed and confused, Alex’s eyes moved wearily back and forth from Jace and Magnus. “Jace…? Magnus…? What happened?”

Jace let out a shuddering laugh as he leaned forward to hug his _parabatai_ tightly.

Alec was confused. It was like he was waking up from a long, restless dream of golden fire and endless flashes incomprehensible flashes and faces. One of his hands shakily reached up to rest on Jace’s back, returning the hug, though he didn’t know why was Jace hugging him like this. Then, he looked aside and watched with further confusion at Magnus who looked uncharacteristically uncomfortable and indecisive.

“Magnus…?” His voice came out hoarse and dry.

“Darl…” Magnus caught himself. “Alexander, how are you feeling?” Magnus wanted so very much to touch Alec but he was unsure whether his touches were welcome. The memory of Alec flinched from his touch made Magnus stand firm at his spot. _Slow._ He reminded himself. _Take it slow._

“Tired…” Alec licked his dry lips. “But what happened?”

Jace let Alec go. “You don’t remember?” The blond Shadowhunter asked.

Hearing Alec’s hoarse voice, Magnus flicked his fingers and suddenly in Jace’s hand was a glass of water. Jace raised his eyebrows questioning at Magnus, silently asking why the warlock didn’t give the water to Alec himself. Magnus gave a discreet head shake. Sighing quietly, Jace helped Alec to sit up and carefully take a few sips of water.

Alec’s eyes darted from Jace to Magnus. “We were fighting demons and suddenly…” Alec eyebrows scrunched as he tried to remember. Magnus helplessly thought that even with his hazel eyes were dark with exhaustion, his lips cracked, his face paled and his black hair dishevelled, Alexander was still the most beautiful person Magnus had ever laid his eyes on.

“…There was something pushing me down to the ground. The force was heavy and persistent. And then, I felt some kind of energy - power? - pushed into my head and caused my nose to…” Automatically Alec reached towards his nose, instinctively wanted to wipe the phantom blood.

“Yeah, your nose was bleeding a little.” Jace told him.

“So, what was on me?” Alec asked. “Did you see it?”

“I was hoping that you could tell us because when we turned around, you were already unconscious on the ground.” Jace went quiet and then continued. “And you were out for three days.”

“What?!” Alec jerked forward in surprise before his body protested violently at the sudden movement. Like a puppet being cut off the strings, Alec collapsed back on his pillow, groaning at the sudden pain of moving the unused muscles. “By Angels…” Alec breathed. He had never felt this weak before.

“Jace,” Magnus admonished the blond for being so blunt. “Maybe you should call Isabelle? She was so worried.”

“Yeah, okay…” Jace reached for Alec’s hand once again and squeezed it tight before running out of the infirmary.

Without Jace to act as a buffer between them, the atmosphere in the Infirmary was tense. Magnus watched silently as the doctors fussed over Alec. He had this one chance to convince Alec that he was still worth taking the risk for - that Magnus had no further intention of repeating his mistakes. He had this one chance to convince Alec to let them start all over again.

Two months without Alec was the closest thing to him being in hell. Alexander had always reached out for him and if Magnus couldn’t do the same, he didn’t deserve Alec’s love.

After the doctors and nurses moved away, Magnus took a deep breath and tentatively pulled a chair closer to Alec’s bed.

Alec watched Magnus sit in silent trepidation. Even after two months of not seeing Magnus, Alec marvelled at how his own heartbeat still quickened at the mere sight of the man. The man looked so devastatingly handsome – even more so than how Alec had remembered him for the last two months. The hold that Magnus had over him was unbelievable. However, the memory of hurt pulsed warningly in his chest, warning him to remember how it felt when Magnus ended things between them.

But, Alec could also clearly see the two-month separation was not kind to either of them. Magnus was pale and kind of dishevelled - something that Alec never thought he would live to see.  

“Alexander,” Magnus started to speak softly. “I…”

“Thank you, Magnus, for coming to help me,” Alec interrupted, looking away. He didn’t want to hear what Magnus had to say because he knew for whatever the question was, Alec’s answer would always be yes. “You didn’t have to do that.”  

“I’ll always come for you,” Magnus said softly.

Alec was upset. “Don’t do this. Don’t come here and say things that I…” He shut up before he could say more.

“I was angry.” Magnus stated hurriedly. Alec raised his eyes to meet Magnus in surprise. “I was angry at you for lying to me. I was hurt to know that you didn’t trust me.”

“And I could never apologize enough for that,” Alec said. Exhaustion clearly in the hazel eyes. “But I tried to make you understand my dilemma. I tried my best to keep both you and my responsibility and I was stupid to think that I can. I know that now.”

Now that Alexander started to open up a little, Magnus took the chance to perch on the bed. He was desperate to make Alexander understand. “No, I am the selfish one. I was angry to see how easy you had lied in front of me, even after I said to the Council that you would never lie to me or to the Council. I was angry that I had to find out about the sword being missing from someone else, when it should have been you. And never once did I consider your position.”

When Magnus saw Alec remain silent, he continued. “Alexander, I prided myself to be a rational and wise warlock. But you darling, being in love with you, somehow is different. It makes me irrational and unwise and so intense in every way.”

Alec cast his eyes downward - still guarded and reluctant.

Something told Magnus that he was losing the window of opportunity; that nothing he said would make Alec let go of his fear. And it scared him.

So, he decided to change his tactic. Magnus raised his hands to cradle Alec’s face and gently pull the dark-haired Shadowhunter’s face upwards to face him. The fact that Alec didn’t flinch away from his touch like he did before, emboldened Magnus further. “Let’s make a deal.”

“A deal…?” Alec frowned at the sudden change.

“Let us be friend.” Magnus softly pled.

“What are you…”

“Hear me out, please.” Magnus gently stroke Alec’s jaw with his thumbs, still unwilling to break the touch. “If right now you cannot allow us to be just like before, then I ask you to allow us to still be friend. It means, when I call you, I want you to pick up. It means, when you are in any trouble or - or when you need my assistance for anything; even as mundane as opening a portal, I want you to call me first and not any other warlocks. I don’t want you to - to shut me out ever again and, _darling_ , if you can give me that, I will never demand anything back from you.”

Alec’s breath was stuck behind his throat at Magnus’s words. Of all the things he thought Magnus would say, this was not one of them. “Why are you asking this from me? What is it that you hope to achieve?”

Magnus’s hands slid down to hold both of Alec’s hands. “A simple chance.” He answered honestly.

Alec’s eyes went wide.

Magnus tightened his holds. “Even a smallest chance to win you back.”

“Magnus… I…” Alec started to shake his head.

“No, wait.” The warlock said hurriedly. “I’m not asking for anything right now or even in the future if you’re not willing. I’m not even pressuring you to forgive me. But I also know that any opportunity that I might have in winning your heart back will not be there if you keep avoiding me.”

He continued, “So, all I’m asking is that we remain as… friends. And if that is all that you can give me, I will still forever be grateful.”

Alec’s heart ached terribly. The feeling he had towards Magnus washed over him like tidal waves - strong and relentless. He was torn between wanting to pull Magnus towards him and wanting to push the warlock away. The need to kiss him was overwhelming but at the same, the memory of heartache and pain still throbbed fiercely.

This love burned both of them intensely - how could they ever remain as friends?

“You said it’s a deal.” Alec said quietly. “You offer your assistance at zero payment and yet I have nothing to offer you in return except for this illusive chance that you’re saying.”

Magnus swallowed hard. “I just want you in my life, Alexander, as whoever you’re willing to be. And if we were to remain as friends for as long as you live, then, I will teach my heart to be content with that.” The words cut deep inside Magnus, but he also knew that without Alec at all in his life he might lose any will to continue living.

Alec bit his lips as he was thinking about this deal. If he was honest with himself, he missed Magnus somewhat fiercely. There was no doubt that Alec still loved Magnus - it had never lessened - but he couldn’t make himself to reach out to Magnus. The phantom pain of heartache had scarred him.  But looking into Magnus’s face, Alec studied how the kohl that was framing his dark brown eyes was drawn messily and how Magnus appeared to have been driven sleepless.

And Alec hadn’t had the heart to refuse him - not before and certainly not now.

So, what else could he do except to nod his head hesitantly.

Judging by the way his heart thundered at the sight of Magnus smiled so brilliantly at his acquiescence, Alec suspected that this would be a deal that he was going to lose out eventually.

 


	2. Take my hand and let us walk together, slow or fast it makes no matter.

 

* * *

_How could I have missed the small things about you,_

_That I have realised after the initial passion is lost;_

_Like how my wants are allowed to shine through,_

_Like how my happiness matters you the most._

_Through the fire of passion, you are my lover,_

_With your beauty, my body and heart you control;_

_But through the lens of friendship I discover,_

_That I could never live without your beautiful soul._

* * *

 

After the event, the Institute went on to its normal activities as usual. It took several days for Jace and Isabelle to be fully comfortable letting Alec out of their sight. Alec, who understood - more than anyone else - the need to keep an eye on the people he loved after a harrowing incident, allowed Jace and Isabelle’s fussing with minimum protests.

No one in the infirmary knew why Alec suddenly came out from his unexplained coma and while it was fine with him, Magnus was not. Alec knew the warlock hated not knowing the reason behind the attack on the Shadowhunter. But there was no evidence - aside from the weird scorched mark - and with nothing to go on, Alec was willing to let the whole incident go.

Speaking of Magnus, they were on mutual truce. Despite of his initial doubt and reluctance, Alec had kept on his side of the bargain. Magnus called him once every two days, clearly not wanting to overwhelm the younger man. And every time he called, Alec hovered his fingers on the answer button, considering rejecting but proceeded to accept. The ghosts of pain were insisting him to continue hiding away, but his promise to Magnus to at least try to reconnect as friends made him accept the warlock’s call. Their conversation was stilted at first -  out of practice - but as it was when Magnus had first charmed him, this time around, the warlock seemed to pull all his tricks and before Alec knew it, he had cracked a smile throughout the conversation.

He had forgotten how much fun Magnus could be without all the sharp barbs and condescending words that he had been receiving for weeks before Valentine’s demise. Alec’s acute youth compared to Magnus’s long life made him so outclass when it came to exchanging taunts. He had learned back then just how much Magnus could hurt him.

But now, with the conversations of truce flowed between them, Alec was relearning this side of Magnus that he had forgotten. The tone of the conversations was friendly; Magnus had kept his promise of being just his friend. They were not flirty; they were about the Institute, missions, Downworlders’ business or even about the potion Magnus planned to brew. Alec was reminded once again how vast Magnus’s knowledges and life experiences were and he was silently impressed.

“The demonic attacks on the east side are getting more frequent.” Alec told Magnus over a telephone call, six days after he had awakened from the unexplained coma. “The reports said that demons are attacking the Downworlders and Mundanes all together and then the demons seem to vanish without any trace. It is very strange.”

“I have talked to people who know people on the east side, it seems there’s a new warlock who is specialised in summoning demons.” Magnus replied.

“Have you met this warlock?”

“Well, darling…” and Alec’s heart tightened at the endearment traitorously. But he knew that the ‘darling’ was no longer exclusive for him; it was just Magnus’ way of speaking. “Even though I am the High Warlock, not all warlocks deem it courteous to meet me.”

“Perhaps I should go and pay him a visit.” Alec said thoughtfully.

“Not without me, you’re not.” Magnus said sharply.  “If there’s a new player in town, I intend to make it my business.”

“But I thought you said you didn’t want to get to know this warlock.”

“Yeah, but now that you plan to go and meet him _alone_ -” Magnus stressed on the word. “I don’t have much of a choice now, do I?”

“I can take care of myself.” Alec reassured the warlock. “Besides, Jace and Izzy are busy dealing with other more important things, I figure a mere self-introduction to the new warlock is nothing to be concerned about.”

“Well, you don’t have to go alone. We’re friends, right? I’ll meet you at the coffee shop that you like so much tomorrow at noon.”

“Seriously, Magnus. You don’t have to.”

“Alec,” Magnus said firmly. “I’ll see you there, okay.”

“Okay,” Alec said to the now disconnected phone.

These kinds of conversation were slowly driving Alec insane. He didn’t know whether to hate the way his heart thundering at the accidental endearments that Magnus kept dropping or to love it. But then, Magnus was always charming to the people around him. The endearments might not mean anything.

And Magnus was not pushing for anything.

And Alec was simply being stupid, getting worked up over nothing.

Sighing quietly, Alec put away his phone and proceeded to find Isabelle. After a few tries, he found Izzy in the morgue; her dark hair framed her head as she studiously looked at whatever disgusting flesh in the petri dish.

“Hey, Izzy.”

The dark-haired girl raised her head and broke a huge smile when she saw her brother. “Hey, Alec! What’s up?”

“I just got off phone with Magnus. He told me that there’s a new warlock in the east side that may or may not cause the increase in demon activity there.”

“Good. It is getting ridiculous,” Isabelle replied. She didn’t blink at the fact that Alec and Magnus were talking again. Alec had told her what Magnus had requested of him - one night in the Infirmary after ceaseless insistences from Isabelle – and while she didn’t understand why Magnus had requested Alec to allow him to remain as a friend, Isabelle was still happy to see the way Alec’s shoulders had stopped looking so tense. Like something heavy had been taken off from Alec and it made Alec look less unhappy than he was before he went into coma. “So, what does the warlock do?”

“Specialising in demon summoning apparently,” Alec said dryly. “So, I intend to see the warlock tomorrow.”

Isabelle stood up abruptly, eyes narrowing. “Not alone, you’re not.”

Alec raised his eyes heavenward at the same worried words Isabelle and Magnus said to him. “Izzy,” Alec said patiently. “You and Jace have your own missions to attend to. Besides, I’m going crazy being all cooped up in here doing nothing but paperwork.”

“You’re convalescing!”

“It’s been a week.” The protest that came out of his mouth sounded too close to whining, much to Alec’s chagrin.

“Six days.” Isabelle corrected her brother, arms crossing.

“Well, tomorrow will make it a week. And I’m not going alone. Magnus offered to go with me.”

Isabelle’s eyes went wide. “And you said yes?” When Alec told her about this agreement, Isabelle never thought it extended to outings as well.

Alec shifted his stand from one foot to another, clearly uncomfortable. “Well, we did agree to move on and stay as friends,” he mumbled. “This is what friends do, I think.”

Isabelle’s eyes softened. As much as she was angry at Magnus for breaking her inexperienced brother’s heart, she was still very much rooting for the warlock. Isabelle would always be Magnus and Alec biggest supporter no matter what happened. And clearly Magnus was trying hard with all the phone calls and the undemanding presence - which was so unlike the flamboyant warlock. Despite Alec’s insistence that they were to remain friends, Isabelle just couldn’t see Magnus _give up._ “Well, if Magnus accompanies you, then, by all means, go.”

Alec turned around to exit the morgue, pausing before turning back to Isabelle. “You do realise that I am the Head of Institute, right? I don’t actually need your permission.”

Isabelle snorted and waved her hand dismissively at Alec. “Be home before ten.”

Alec shook his head fondly and left.

* * * * *

“Hey Alexander,” Magnus smiled when he saw the lanky figure walk into the cafe. The way Alec hunched his shoulders while walking was familiar and his heart eased slightly from the tightness he had been feeling ever since they had broken up. Even though it was just a week ago since he saw Alec, seeing Alec now made his day a little bit brighter and his heart a little bit lighter and Magnus knew he had made the right move when he proposed the deal.

Alec curved a small smile at the way Magnus stood from his chair to greet him. “Hi, Magnus.”

“Do you want to order something first, or do you want to go and see the warlock right away?”

“We should go visit the warlock,” Alec raised his hand to scratch his head, making his messy hair even more dishevelled. “Izzy set a curfew and I don’t want to break it.”

Magnus grabbed his coat and he hastened his movement to follow Alec. “Curfew? I thought you’re the Head of Institute?” He teased.

Alec snorted. “That’s what I told her. Apparently, she thinks the position doesn’t amount that much.”

“Siblings,” Magnus agreed. “Not that I know much about that.”

Alec smiled softly and Magnus’s heart melted a little.

They, then, proceeded to talk amicably as they walked to the demon-summoning warlock’s house. The conversation was easy and light – it was made easy from the previous phone calls they had throughout the week. It wasn’t long before they reached their destination.

“Here we are,” Magnus stated. “Cat said the warlock house has an orange door - a tacky colour choice for a door, if you asked me - and a quite messy parlour.”

Alec fought the need to smile at Magnus words as he looked around. “I think I found it.”

Magnus looked at Alec’s direction and nodded his head in agreement. “Come on.”

When they were both in front of the door, Alec raised his hand to knock it. A few moments later, they heard the door being unlocked and there stood an ordinary-looking man, stood taller than Alec, which was an impressive feat. “Yes?” He said in deep voice.

“We’re looking for a warlock, who specialised in summoning rituals. We were told that we can find him here.” Alec said.

Magnus studied the warlock in front of him. Jet black hair was neatly styled and it matched the warlock’s equally dark eyes. The black eyes looked old and they were clearly at odd with the warlock’s young face. Something about the warlock told Magnus that he was perhaps older than himself - something that Magnus rarely encountered.  

“Who’s asking?” The dark-haired warlock frowned.

“I’m sorry,” Alec straightened his back. “My name is Alec Lightwood, Head of New York Institute.”

“Ah… a Shadowhunter,” The black eyes roamed along the lithe body of Alec - Magnus didn’t like the faint appreciation that flickered in those eyes. Then the dark eyes shifted from Alec to Magnus in quiet surprise. “…together with a warlock. Time has certainly changed.”

“I’m Magnus Bane, the High Warlock of Brooklyn.” Magnus said.

The small smirk that curved on the black-haired warlock’s face told Magnus that he was amused that a High Warlock came to see him instead of the other way around. And Magnus was prepared to dislike the man.

“My name is Edward Stone. May I ask the reason why a Head Institute together with a High Warlock come to see me? Have I done something wrong?”

“Aren’t you going to invite us in?” Magnus said mildly but there was something about Magnus’ tone that caused Alec to glance at his companion in confusion. Magnus could be brash but he was rarely rude.

“Yes, of course. Where is my manner? Come in, come in,” Edward Stone replies in same steely tone Magnus used.

The inside of Edward’s residence reminded Alec to Iris Rouse’s house. Ordinary and unassuming. He wondered whether this house held the same dark, dirty secrets as Rouse’s residence. Once they were seated, Edward flicked his fingers and three sets of cups and saucers appeared, steaming with hot tea. “Or would you prefer something cold?”

Alec smiled and shook his head. “It’s fine. Thank you.”

“So, where are you from, Mr. Stone? It’s unusual for me to see a new warlock in New York, especially since the whole Valentine’s fiasco.” Alec started.

Edward watched the young Shadowhunter in front of him. A part of him was still surprise to see a Head Institute to be this young and another part of him was even more surprise to see a Shadowhunter working side by side with a warlock - High Warlock of Brooklyn to be exact. Judging by the ease and familiarity between Alec and Magnus, they were definitely more than just a mere associate. For as long as he remembered, the Clave either hired or used Downworlders but never befriended them. He had gone off-grid for far too long and he didn’t know whether this new… development between Shadowhunters and Downworlders was a good thing or not.

 “I have lived a very long life, Mr. Lightwood. Sometimes, the world can seem unbearable. When it does, I choose solitude over society. That’s where I came from - a solitary from people. And this is the first time in a hundred years I have decided to come out.”

Alec’s eyes widened. “You meant to say that you live in the middle of nowhere, alone for a hundred years? And that you have done this before?”

 _How old are you?_ The question was unasked but Edward heard it nevertheless. Somehow, it amused the ancient warlock deeply at how unlike a Shadowhunter Alec was. Blunt and honest - both with his words and his expression.

“For an immortal, time ceases to matter.” Edward spared at quick glance at Magnus. “Just ask your companion.”

Magnus offered no response.

“Mr. Stone, we came here because there have been an increase reports of demonic attacks.” Alec said. “Ever since a rift was opened more than two months ago, Edomian demons have been running amok in the city.”

“Edomian demons rarely attack individually; they prefer to attack in numbers.” Edward said.

“Yeah, we know. Magnus told us.” Alec shifted his head towards Magnus. “But the attack is particularly prominent in this area and we are looking for the possible cause of it.”

“The same Edomian demons?” Edward asks. He didn’t miss how Alec addressed the High Warlock on first name basis.  

“Some Edomian but there are other demons as well - Raveners, Shax - the usual.” Alec replied.

“So, you’re not blaming the rift? What about this Valentine?”

“Oh, you’ve probably have never heard about Valentine if you’ve been isolated for a hundred years,” Alec said thoughtfully. “It’s probably for the best. Anyway, Valentine is no longer a threat and the rift is closed. So, we’re looking other reasons for all of the demonic attacks.”

“Were you responsible for eliminating Valentine, Alec?” Edwards asks. The smooth way the black-haired warlock caressed Alec’s name grated Magnus. “Were you a hero?”

Alec flushed; still feeling mortified after all these months at his ineptitude when he remembered that he had left Clary and Jace to face Valentine alone and caused his own _parabatai_ to suffer death. But when Edward saw the faint rush of blood on Alec’s pale cheeks, he thought Alec was embarrassed at being praised. The warlock was quietly charmed.

“I am not - for both of your questions.” Alec said firmly.

“Then, what is it that you came here for?”

Suddenly, Magnus had enough of this subtle flirtation.

“Are you responsible for the increased demonic attacks? Have you been summoning demons illegally?” Magnus asked suddenly. He didn’t like the progression of this conversation. He didn’t like the way the black eyes brightened in interest at Alec. He didn’t like the fact that he, himself had almost no claim over Alec - not anymore - should Edward decide to make a move towards Alec.   

“Magnus!” Alec exclaimed in exasperation.

Magnus kept his eyes on Edward. “Well?”

“You think that I am responsible for the demonic attack, High Warlock?”

“You’re the one we cannot account for.” Magnus raised his eyebrows.

Edward stared at Magnus, contemplating and weighing the warlock in front of him. Magnus might be shorter than him but from where he sat, he could feel the restrained, untapped magic brewing beneath the unassuming man. It intrigued him. The man didn’t become a High Warlock simply because he was good looking. Something told him that it would be very unwise to underestimate him. “Magnus Bane, unless you have evidence to indicate that I do, I think my answer would be no.”

“So, you’re saying that you are responsible?” Magnus countered.

“I’m saying that I shall leave the business to the Head of New York Institute,” Edward eyed Alec and his smile widened at Alec’s fluster. “I’m sure Alec would do his utmost effort to find the culprit.”

Magnus understood that flicker of interest in the warlock’s eyes. For any Downworlder who had dealt their share of pretentious, arrogant and harsh Shadowhunters all their life, meeting Alec’s stark honesty and youthfulness was a breath of fresh air. Alec was attractive from inside and for old players like him and Edward Stone, physical beauty mattered less than a beautiful soul.

Alec had a beautiful, old soul that shone brighter than most people around him.

That was what had drawn Magnus to Alec in the first place. He could see Edward was beginning to draw to Alec as well.

And Magnus immensely dislike him for it.

“I think we should go, Alexander.” Magnus stood up abruptly, causing Alec to stand up as well.

Alec watched Magnus walk towards the door in confusion. Looking back at Edward, Alec hastily put his hands out. “Thank you for your time, Mr. Stone. I’m sorry for my friend’s abrupt departure.”

Edward took Alec’s hand, shook firmly his hand once. As he released Alec’s hand, he let his thumb slowly caress at the back of Alec’s hand. He held back a smile at the way Alec’s face changed as the young Shadowhunter realised his intention. “It’s been a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Lightwood.”

Alec let his clenched hands fall to his sides as he turned around to follow Magnus. When he saw Magnus standing at the pavement, Alec rushed to his side, waiting to hear the door being closed. “I think Edward Stone is flirting with me.” Alec announced at Magnus; his eyes were wide and his cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

Magnus couldn’t hide the fond smile at Alec’s horrified expression at the knowledge somebody was hitting on him. Alexander was adorable in his obliviousness.

“Yes, darling, I saw that.”

“You did?” Alec was taken aback. ”When?”

“I saw it when he first saw you at his door.” Magnus said. He was trying so very hard to rear in his possessiveness. He had promised Alec to be his friend and he would do that even though the demon side of him was urging him stake his claim.

Unaware of Magnus’s thoughts, Alec sighed. “That was so awkward. Come on, Magnus, let’s get out of here.”

“What about the investigation?” Magnus asked.

“Mr. Stone is right, we need evidence before we can proceed. I think we have done enough to disturb him.”

Leaving Edward Stone behind, both Magnus and Alec proceeded to walk in silence for a while as they enjoyed the cool early evening breeze. The warlock liked the quiet company that Alec offered. “You know, Alexander,” Magnus said thoughtfully. “I can't remember the last time we had a drink and a game of pool or two.”

“Probably before the whole incident about an Iron Sister’s murder,” Alec replied. “It all when straight down to hell after that. I don't think any of us really have a moment of peace until Valentine was killed.” He paused before smiling, “You let me think you couldn't play, so that I would pity you.”

 “It worked, didn't it? You certainly lost the few first rounds before realising my ploy.” Magnus said. Magnus was delighted that Alec didn't shy away from the memory back when they were still together – apparently, not everything about them was hurting Alec.

Alec chuckled. “And after that, I had made you worked for the subsequent victories. I'd thought you wanted to break the pool table in frustration.”

Magnus smirked but didn't deny Alec allegation. Those were the few happy moments Magnus cherished in the short time they were together. “So, Alec. What are you planning to do after this?”

“Go home, probably,” Alec admitted. “I don't really have much of any plan lately.” Faint flush graced his face.

Hearing this emboldened the warlock to further say, “I heard that there's a new bar open around this area. I thought maybe you would like to try the pool table there.” And he held his breath in trepidation of Alec’s response.

Alec didn't even hesitate. “You are going to regret asking me to play against you. I would have you know that that I have improved on my techniques.”

Magnus was silently ecstatic but he hid it with a shrug that was clearly meant to be a provocation. “I don't believe you have improved at all. You were the one who said that you didn't have much time before Valentine was dead,” he teased.

Alec laughed. “Oh, you're so on. Come on!”

And as Magnus watched the carefree laughter escape from Alec as the younger man ran ahead, he fell a little further in love.

 * * * * *

It wasn’t until Alec entered the Institute late that evening that he realised Edward Stone had put something in his pocket jeans. Spending time with Magnus had been surprisingly good. Alec was surprise to see how the phantom pain from their breakup didn't affect his feeling that evening. Clearly having a platonic relationship was a good idea for him to begin healing from his heartache. Alec couldn't remember the last time he had that much fun. They had competed in a few games of pool as they threw playful taunts and criticisms at each other's skills.

It bewildered Alec to see that by just being friends, there were no future expectations to be fulfilled and there were no dating ethics to be adhered. Throughout their plays, they were just two people, enjoying each other’s company.

And without the tint of relationship glass, words flowed between them freely without any filter. Alec was purview to things that he had never known before, like how much Magnus loved being a High Warlock because the title meant that people would come to him for assistance. It meant, Magnus loved being able to use his power to bring whatever little happiness to people who needed it without obliging to demand payment. See, Alec didn't know that before. When they were in a relationship, the need to appear as potential lover in front of Alec was holding Magnus from sharing mundane things like that with him. Sometimes, Alec had to pry intimate information from the ever-capable High Warlock of Brooklyn and rarely the warlock yielded. But now, it seemed like the need to maintain that certain level of worthiness had gone and what was left in front of Alec was a simple man who had astonishingly simple likes and dislikes.

And Alec liked that. Alec liked the unreserved way Magnus spoke about himself. Alec also liked the way Magnus was equally enchanted when he also spoke of little uninteresting bits about himself. And now, Magnus knew that he hated open water and he hated spider fiercely. Those were a few little things that Alec knew he would never divulge to Magnus before upon fearing Magnus would see him lacking.

Alec was lost in his thought as he dipped his hand into the pocket of his jeans. But before he could reach for the thing that Edward Stone had left for him, he heard Jace call him and immediately he forgot about it.

“Alec, wait up!”

Alec turned and smiled softly when he saw Jace jog towards him. “What’s up?” Alec asked.

“Izzy said you went out with Magnus?” A pair of blond eyebrows raised.

“We went out to investigate the new warlock. You don’t have to put it like that.” Alec frowned.

“Hey,” Jace raised his hand up to placate his _parabatai_. “You know I support you for whatever you want. Even though I still want to sock the guy in the face sometimes.”

Alec snorted. “I think the feeling is mutual, Jace. Anyway, where’s Izzy? I have something to tell you guys about the warlock we saw today.”

“In the training room, I think.”

The _parabatai_ pair walked shoulder to shoulder to the training room. In there, they saw Izzy swing her whip and inwardly flinched at the vicious whack-whack hitting the dummy. Their sister was always lethal with her whip and five-inch heels.

“What’s up guys?” Isabelle greeted her siblings as she rolled her whip up.

“Alec just got back from his date - _sorry_ , appointment - with Magnus,” Jace smirked. Alec just rolled his eyes.

“The warlock’s name is Edward Stone. I have the strongest feeling that he is way older than Magnus, which is kind of impressive. He claims that he has nothing to do with any demonic attacks. Apparently, the guy has just re-joined the society of this century. He doesn’t even know Valentine.” Alec reported. “I think Magnus doesn’t like him - not that I blame him, the warlock isn’t very forthcoming.”

“Does Magnus think Edward is responsible for the demonic attacks?” Isabelle asked.

“Maybe not directly.” Alec said thoughtfully. “I don’t know. Magnus isn’t being so clear either. Maybe being cryptic and vague are warlocks’ default response.”

“So, does Edward say anything else?” Jace said.

“No… nothing-” Alec stopped abruptly as he remembered something. “Wait, I think Edward put something in my pocket.”

“What is it?” Jace’s face grew concern.

Alec buried his hand in his pocket, rummaging for the item. When he pulled out, all the three siblings raised their eyebrows to see a single card with the warlock’s name, a phone number and the words _Call me?_ written in flirty font.

Alec could feel his cheeks starting to burn in embarrassment.

“Is there something you want to tell us, Alec?” Jace’s smirk grew.

Isabelle’s expression matched the one with Jace’s. Her red-painted lips twisted in her failed attempt to stifle a laugh at her brother’s mortified expression. “Yeah, Alec. How come only warlocks fall for you? What’s your secret?” Isabelle laughed at the way Alec’s fair face became red.

“It’s nothing… I, I-” Alec waved the card in the air, trying to defend himself when something happened.

It struck him so unexpectedly.

It happened both too fast or too slow.

Suddenly Alec’s sight was blanketed with darkness, blinding him from his surrounding and instead, flurry of images racing in front of his eyes like incomprehensible movie. The images were shoved hard into his brain like unwanted invasion and Alec was helpless to stop it. Along with the images came the pain. The same intense, all-encompassing pain that he felt a week ago before he succumbed to three-day unconsciousness.

Alec barely felt the hard ground or heard his siblings’ cries of surprise as he kneeled hard to the floor with one hand clutching at his head. His senses were muffled and all that Alec could see were the images. Where ever the images came from, the sender was insistent in making Alec pay attention to the message instead of the pain.

But the unexpected messages/images were incomprehensible as the pain in his head blindsided him. Alec couldn’t make himself focus on understanding the images. The pain was too much.

Vaguely, he felt himself being pulled into somebody’s else lap and his face was being stroked frantically. “ALEC! ALEC” Jace’s voice sounded distant.

“What’s happening?!” There was Izzy’s panicked voice.

Alec opened his mouth to tell his siblings but all that came out was painful gasps. As if the sender of the images finally understood that Alec couldn’t get through the flurry of images, the visions started to slow down and amidst the visions, there was only one image Alec could see.

In that one static image, he saw that he was in some sort of underground? cave? tunnel? with a huge hole in front of him. He couldn’t see what was on the other side of the hole or even his surroundings. But the only image he saw clearly was that there was something was trying to push its way out of the hole. It was big; it was powerful. Against his will, Alec strained his mind to try to see further into the hole.

But the pain in his head was too much.

At the background, he heard Izzy said that she was calling Magnus. In a detached feeling, he felt Jace’s fingers wipe something warm off his face. _Am I crying?_ He wondered.

And then, it stopped.

As suddenly as the images came, they vanished abruptly, causing Alec to slump into Jace’s embrace in utter relief. The pain was also gone as the images dissipated. But the phantom pain lingered, causing Alec’s breaths to stutter unevenly and his body trembled as if he had just finished a long marathon.

“Alec! Look at me!” Jace demanded.

Alec groaned. By the Angel… he was so tired - the pain sapped his energy so totally and so suddenly. His head felt fuzzy as if his brain was turned mush in a hypothetical blender. He let his face remain buried in Jace’s shoulder. “What… what the hell was that?” Alec wheezed.

“Alec, come on, look at us.” Isabelle’s voice sounded so shaken that Alec forced his muscles to lift his face away from Jace.

The first thing he saw was Jace’s hand and neck covered in blood. “Jace…,” Alec rasped. “You’re bleeding… Are you alright?”

The shock in Jace’s mismatched eyes was apparent. Even now, Alec couldn’t shake his protector mode that instead of focusing on himself, his stupid _parabatai_ thought Jace was the one hurting. “Not me, you idiot! You are! Your nose is bleeding!”

When Isabelle saw Alec drop to his knees in apparent pain; his knuckles went white as he grasped his head, she felt the ground beneath her gave away. And then, at the first sight of blood rushed out of his brother’s nose prompted her to take out her phone. Her first panicked instinct whenever Alec was hurt was always to call Magnus. She was already scrolling down her phone when Alec suddenly came out of this… this onslaught that at that moment, she immediately dropped her phone to kneel beside Jace, facing her brother. Any attempt to call Magnus was forgotten.

Alec’s hazel eyes were still dazed in the aftermath of the intense pain. His cheeks and chin were smeared with blood, stark against his pale-white skin. In his hand, - the one that he used to brace himself on the floor - was the card from Edward Stone, crumpled. It was hard to understand that not a few minutes ago, Isabelle had planned to tease Alec about it endlessly.

Isabelle tore the hem of her shirt to wipe Alec’s face clean and used another piece of her shirt to wipe Jace’s neck and hand. Her hand was still shaking. If she could have her way, Isabelle wanted to shield both of her brothers with only the sheer of her love.

All three of them spent a few moments huddling together, comforting themselves, before Jace - the ever restless between three of them -  spoke up.

“Do you mind telling me what the hell was that about?”

Alec shook his head softly. “I… it was hard to explain. I don’t know what I saw…”

“You saw something? What did you see?” Isabelle asked.

“I am at somewhere dark and in front of me is a… a huge hole, like a demon rift that we closed a few months ago. But it is bigger and there is something pushing its way out of the hole…” Alec’s eyes glazed unseeingly, remembering the vision. “I think it tries to come out but there’s something holding it back - and there is someone on the other side of the hole, I think - I can’t see who or what…”

Jace didn’t like the distant way Alec’s face looked. Like he was physically here but his mind was already wandered away from him - somewhere Jace couldn’t follow. The thought that he couldn’t follow his _parabatai_ anywhere chilled him to the core. “Hey, hey… Alec, come back.”

Alec’s eyes snapped back and Jace was relieved to see the hazel eyes stared back at him. “I don’t remember seeing anything else beyond that.” Alec said finally.

“A prophetic vision?” Isabelle frowned. “Have we ever heard any Shadowhunter being able to see the future?”

“What? Izzy…” Alec protested weakly. “We don’t know if it is a prophetic. It could just be…”

“It could be what? Memories of past life? Residual of last night’s nightmare?” Isabelle scoffed. “There’s no other possible explanation. It must have been prophetic!”

Alec looked at his _parabatai_ , silently asking him to refute Isabelle.

Jace looked at his siblings in contemplation. The silence told Alec and Isabelle that the theory of prophetic vision was possible. “What I want to know is why this?” Jace said grimly. “Why Alec. And why now.”

“Is it because of the attack on me last week?” Alec wondered. “We never knew who did it.”

Isabelle opened her mouth to say something when at that moment Clary walked in. The redhead stopped abruptly at the sight of her three favourite Shadowhunters huddled together on the floor. Her eyebrows raised at the way Jace’s hands cradles Alec’s arms and at the way Isabelle leaned against Alec’s side. “Hey guys, what’s up? Did I miss a memo on team-building course or something?” Clary joked.

Something in Isabelle’s face -  an expression of fear that was not quite gone yet - caused Clary to regret her joke and she quickly became sombre. Whatever happened in the last hour must have been serious. “Hey…” Clary said softly. “What’s wrong?”

Jace sighed and he raised his hand to pull Clary in.

 


	3. The payment to see the future is not going to be cheap.

 

* * *

_You know, I will trust you with my life,_

_Even if with the scars I will still survive;_

_For every wound inflicted will eventually heal,_

_And the trust will never be repealed._

_But it is the matter of heart that I fear the most,_

_For the wound of heart is the highest of cost;_

_I’ve wanted so much to hand the fragile trust to you,_

_But the past heartaches refrain me from coming through._

* * *

  

Clary paced worriedly. She was hoping that after Valentine was dead, all four of them could take a long, uninterrupted breather. But this news troubled her. As much as she didn’t like the fact that Alec could be seeing dark and unpleasant future, the thing that worried her the most was the fact the effect of the visions had on Alec.

Clearly, the vision hurt Alec. Clary stole a glance at Alec’s pale face. Okay, it had hurt Alec _a lot._ Still… she wondered whether the vision that Alec had come from the same source as her runic vision. She wondered whether the vision came from the Angels.

Because they could never identify the scorched mark surrounding Alec. The red-orange tinged scorched mark.

“What are you thinking, Clary?” Jace asked.

Right now, they were in Alec’s room. Clary realised that this was the first time she was here since the night she came back from Valentine’s ship. She remembered seeing Alec’s almost lifeless body laid on the bed with Magnus mixing whatever concoction next to him. It was the night Clary realised the depth of _parabatai_ bond. It was unfathomable because Clary didn’t know how it felt losing half of your soul. When Isabelle explained to her that part of Alec’s soul was lost because it was searching for Jace, she knew that she couldn’t compare the bond she had with Jace with the bond Jace had with Alec. It didn’t mean that Jace loved her lesser, it was a different kind of love but no less soul-consuming, no less heart-wrenching.

For someone who had been raised by cold-hearted Valentine, Clary was ceaselessly amazed by the capacity of Jace’s heart to love.  

Currently, Alec was lying on his neatly made bed, his head resting on Isabelle’s lap as she apparently was still reluctant to let her brother out of touch. Clary could see how the incident had badly shaken Isabelle that Clary was secretly relieved for not being there to see Alec receiving the vision. Even though Jace had a firm hold on her heart, there was always a piece of her that had never been able to handle seeing either Alec or Izzy hurt. Maybe it was because the Lightwood siblings were the first friends she had in the Shadowhunter world, especially after losing her mother.

Jace was lounging on one of the two chairs in Alec’s room, close to the bed as well. Clary’s heart tightened at the blood stain on Jace’s shirt’s neckline, suddenly remembering the awful, awful moment when Jace had temporarily died. She knew that the memory would always stay with her even when they were both white-haired and wrinkled and old.

“I was thinking that we have never identified the creature that attacked Alec before.”

“We’ve looked everywhere, we’ve gone through countless books and there’s nothing that can tell us” Jace countered. “In exception of asking the Silent Brothers, of course.”

“Yes,” Clary said. “But that was before we know that Alec will be receiving some sort of prophetic vision.”

“How is that significant?” Alec asked. “Plus, we don’t even know whether it will happen again. It could just be a one-off event. You know, a residual effect from the previous attack.”

Izzy frowned. “Come on, big brother. I don’t think that this is one-off event.”

“Also,” Alec continued, ignoring Isabelle. “I don’t know whether we should call it prophetic vision. Not when what I saw was so vague.”

Jace looked at his parabatai in fond exasperation. For someone who was lying on his little sister’s lap, Alec was such a little shit. “What were you’re saying, Clary?” Jace said pointedly.

“I was thinking about how I also received visions.” Clary said carefully. “You know, visions of new runes that are not in the Gray Book.” With that, Clary saw three set of eyes slowly widen in realisation.

“You… you meant to say the vision could come from the Angels?” Isabelle said, disbelief.

“It made sense,” Clary said. “We know that whatever attack Alec the other day couldn’t be demons. And there’s no history in any Downworlders that speaks of prophetic abilities - Dot’s supposedly ability to read tarot cards is a ruse to hide the Mortal Cup; she told me that she could never read into the future. On the other hand, when Jace and I helped Angel _Ithuriel_ escape from Valentine’s captivity, he showed us the vision of Soul Sword being destroyed by demon.”

“Which was proven to be not prophetic but misleading,” Alec tried again. In his opinion, making a conclusion based on one-off event was stupid and useless.

“Shut up, Alec,” Jace rolled his eyes. “Go on, Clary.”

Clary was now on the roll. “We have incidents where Angels often communicate with visions. So, why can’t they give the visions of future - albeit however vague they are - to Alec?”

“But Clary, you and I are different,” Jace protested. “We have more angel blood than any other Shadowhunters. That’s why you could see the new runes and I can activate my runes without stele. We have the needed tool to form connection to Angels - Alec doesn’t.”

“Thank you!” Alec chimed in. Jace finally had had enough. He smacked Alec’s shoulder playfully.

“You know… Maybe that’s why the vision hurt Alec,” Isabelle spoke up softly. “Because he doesn’t have the ability to receive the Angelic vision. It is like how Mundane turned into Forsaken for receiving Angelic runes without Angel’s blood in their veins.”

The statement caused Clary to stop in her pacing and Jace to straighten his back. Alec looked up at his younger sister and his heart ached at the look of utter worry and fear. “Izzy…”

“I can’t!” Isabelle snapped. Her red lips were gnawed in trepidation. “I can’t watch you go through that again when I know there’s nothing I can do to help you.”

“Izzy, these are all still just conjectures. We don’t for sure that this is from Angels or that it will happen again.” Alec raised himself up to comfort Isabelle, reacting the old-age instinct to comfort his sister whenever something was bothering her.  

“Still, we need to find out what causes this,” Isabelle insisted. “I don’t care if it only happened once. We ignored finding the creature in the first place and now this happens. Angel or demon, I don’t care. Something is causing Alec to see whatever and something that hurt that much couldn’t be good.”

Clary nodded before looking torn between thoughtful and apologizing, like she knew that none of her friends was going to like what she would say. “Izzy’s right, I think we need help.”

“What do you mean help?” Jace frowned.

“We need a warlock’s help. And who is more powerful than Magnus Bane?”

They bickered for a while about whether Magnus should be brought in. Alec thought that they had troubled the warlock enough and proposed that they waited to see whether if this event will happen again. Isabelle had stood up and had her hands on her hips, declaring that of course Magnus should be notified. The warlock would have their heads if he knew they didn’t tell him about what was happening to Alec. Jace proposed finding another warlock which received head slap from Isabelle for even suggesting that.

After a while, they finally agreed to wait until tomorrow morning to see Magnus. After all, Alec pointed out, what else could possibly happen while they were waiting for tomorrow? Plus, there was no way Alec going to bother the warlock this late of night. Jace and Isabelle had reluctantly agreed. When his room was clear from overbearing, protective siblings and friend, Alec pushed himself off the bed and went to find some papers and pencils.

Alec wasn’t much of an artist. But as much as he had insisted that that was not a prophetic vision, the leader in him told him that at the very least he should try to illustrate what he had seen before he had forgotten the details in his vision.

Finding the needed pencils and papers, Alec sat down and poised himself before closing his eyes to recall the vision. It took a little effort but the memory came and Alec could see it. He opened his eyes to translate the memory into drawing. As his hand moved in tandem with the lines of the cave/tunnel/underground, the depth of the hole in front of him and the silhouette of the someone on the other side of the hole, Alec allowed himself to slowly lose into his mind. His eyes were focused on the paper but he wasn’t really seeing the drawing; rather he felt the immersion into the vision, picking out, drawing up each detail. His hands drew the vision in almost frantic motion, afraid that he might miss out any detail of that moment in his head.

When he finally came out of whatever trance he was in, Alec looked at the clock on the table and realised that he had spent half an hour drawing. Funny, Alec thought, it didn’t feel like half an hour had passed. Then, he looked down at the finished work and his eyes widened in disbelief.

Again, Alec wasn’t much of an artist and he knew he couldn’t draw to save himself. But the drawing in front of him was unlike anything that he was able to draw before. The bold black strokes illustrated his vision well enough. Although it was not as beautiful as Clary’s drawing but Alec knew he couldn’t have drawn this.

Something had guided his hand while he was lost in his memory. Something demonic? Something angelic? The thought that something could have possessed him again made Alec want to throw up. He barely got over Jocelyn’s death. And now this?

Alec’s body went cold in fear as he pushed the drawing away from him violently as if the drawing burned him. The drawing and the pencil fell on the floor. He ignored them as he quickly crawled into his bed; blanket over his head with one thought hammered in his brain repetitively.

_What the hell is happening to me?_

* * * * *

Magnus held his phone with his ring-adorned fingers poised on his contact list. He had plenty of time to spend, now that the potion was left to brew for at least an hour before it was completed. It had been three days since he had seen Alec. The last time he saw Alec was when they got back from investigating Edward Stone and Alec was waving him goodbye before running up the steps of the Institute. After that, the hollow in his gut grew bigger as each day passed. Magnus knew he missed Alec.

On the other hand, the news of demonic attacks on the east side of Brooklyn had dwindled ever since the both he and Alec had paid a surprise visit to Edward Stone. If that wasn’t a proof that smarmy warlock had something to do with the demonic attacks, Magnus didn’t know what else the Clave wanted.

Magnus’s graceful finger hovered at Alec’s name, indecisive whether to call him or not. Alec had thoughtfully messaged him three days ago that the Institute would be busy for a few days because the Clave wanted to do a sudden inspection on the Institute operations. As the Head, Alec had to be there to entertain the auditors. It explained the three-day silence. The message soothed Magnus because he knew Alec didn't have any obligation towards him, but the Shadowhunter told him anyway. The message told Magnus that Alec was slowing overcoming his fear of being near Magnus.

This was good. This was very good.

But three days without hearing Alec’s voice was unacceptable. Magnus was about to call Alec when suddenly he heard his door being knocked. Sighing, Magnus put down his phone to open the door.

Any reproach he might have evaporated when he saw Alec on the other side of the door. “Alexander,” Magnus greeted with a smile. Maybe Alec was indeed a magical being, for here he was after Magnus was sorely missing him. “I was just about to call you.”

Alec unfailingly flushed at the sight of Magnus’s smile - welcoming and warm. He couldn't help himself for the warlock always had the power to make his heart race and his stomach flutter. “Hi, Magnus.”

Magnus couldn’t stop his hand from moving as he reached up to Alec’s messy hair to push strands of dark hair off Alec’s forehead. Then, he let the same fingers slide down to Alec’s reddening cheek. “You look rushed. Did you run all the way here?” He teased the Shadowhunter.

Alec just smiled that sweet smile of his, abashed at Magnus’s touches.

Magnus opened his mouth to continue teasing Alec when suddenly Jace pushed Alec inside, followed by Isabelle and Clary. “Hey, Magnus. We need your opinion.” And just like that the moment was broken.

Magnus raised his eyebrows. Inside, he was quite disappointed that Alec didn’t come alone, but he would rather see Alec with his siblings than not seeing him at all. He would take what he could. “Come in, come in,” he said sarcastically.

Alec looked at the way Jace sat down on the sofa without modesty and shook his head. “Sorry for bothering you, Magnus.” Alec scratched at the back of his head shyly. Magnus was a pool of goo on his living room floor at the sight of Alec’s self-conscious face.

“An opinion?” Magnus asked as he closed the door behind him.

The four Shadowhunters looked each other, willing one of them to tell Magnus what had happened three days ago. Jace, Clary and Isabelle knew the warlock would flip out when he found out what happened to Alec and no one thought of telling him immediately. Magnus and Alec could say that they were friends all they want, but it was a fact of life, like the sky was blue, and the fire was hot, that Magnus was Alec’s keeper. Although, it was hardly their fault if the Clave suddenly wanted to do a three-day inspection. During that time, they had been running around like chicken, entertaining the auditor, that they couldn’t follow through with their plan to see Magnus earlier.

The silence descended among them. Magnus knew that looks. Almost two years of knowing them, Magnus was well adept with the we-have-a-bad-news look. And their version of bad news was always leading to death or the end of the world. The familiar heavy feeling of dread in his gut appeared. “What happened?” The warlock demanded.

Clary decided to bear the responsibility and began telling Magnus. Magnus’s eyes went wide and his hands clenched tightly as the story progressed. His whole body tense and the air tasted metallic with magic. Isabelle inwardly flinched. Clary’s storytelling was precise and straight to the point. The redhead didn’t tell the way blood flowed out of Alec’s nose as the vision was getting too much or how Alec had gasped in pain or how Jace and Isabelle’s panicked callings of Alec’s name went unheard until he was finally released from the vision. Even without all these details, Magnus looked decidedly angry of being left out and worried at the turn of event.

“So, there have been no other vision after that one?” Magnus asked. All of them could see the anger in Magnus was forcibly reined in. Instead, in front of them was the High Warlock of Brooklyn, assuming his position.

“No, there haven’t” Alec answered. He hated the fact he was the cause of Magnus’s anger. “But something else happened that night, after you all left my room.”

“What? What happened?” Jace stood up.

Swallowing hard, Alec reached inside his jacket’s pocket and pulled out a piece of folded paper. “After you guys left, I thought it would be wise for me to draw what I saw. You know, in case it is important. I can do a lot of things but if there's one thing that I can't do is drawing. But somehow, I drew this.” Alec unfolded the paper and show them the drawing.

Isabelle and Jace gasped. “You drew this?!” Jace asked. “But... but you can’t draw!”

“I know,” Alec said, stress was evident in his voice.

“I mean, you _can’t_ draw!” Jace repeated uselessly.

Alec started to pace in agitation. “It’s hard to explain, but at that time, I could feel my hands moving, I was aware that I was drawing but at the same time, I was- I was in the vision, remembering it. It was like I was drawing and not drawing at the same time.  Before I knew it, I’ve lost half an hour.” Alec stopped to look at Magnus pleadingly. “Please tell me I wasn’t being possessed because I can’t do that anymore.”

The fear on Alec’s face was palpable that Magnus immediately grabbed the tall Shadowhunter’s arms. He remembered those dark days very well - the helplessness, the soul-crushing guilt and the image of Alec standing on ledge. It was not just Alec who couldn’t go through that anymore - Magnus didn’t think he could either. “If you can remember that night in detail, it was not a possession.” Magnus stated firmly.

Alec looked at Magnus doubtfully.

“I will not let that happen to you again, Alexander, I promise you.” Magnus tightened his grip, demanding Alec to believe him.

Alec took a few shuddering breaths at Magnus’s promise and then, a few seconds more to let the fear that had been festering him for the last three days go. Funny how he had been afraid of Magnus and yet here he was, finding comfort from the very same man. Reluctantly, Alec nodded, the soldier in him returned. “Sorry… this has been…” Alec fell silent.

“Yeah…” Jace agreed wholeheartedly, his eyes were still looking down at the impossible drawing. “What the hell is happening here?”

“I don’t think there is any precedent incident like this. Not that I recall of,” Magnus said. “What we are dealing here is something new, something I haven’t encountered before.”

“Clary has a theory that what Alec experiences might be similar to her runic vision,” Isabelle offered.

“Visions from angels?” Magnus asked sceptically.

Isabelle nodded. “We also think that the fact that Alec doesn’t have the same kind of blood like Jace and Clary causes him to feel pain when he receives the vision.”

Magnus looked thoughtful; ringed finger tapped on his chin. “Shadowhunters can only receive Angels’ power through some sort of mediums - the Gray Book, runes, _adamas_ and _stele_. Clary and Jace are the first Shadowhunters that I encountered to be able to bypass some of the mediums. And to receive visions directly from Angels is completely unheard of, until you, Biscuit.”

“So, what are you saying?” Clary asked.

“I’m saying unless we find the creature that did this to Alec, we will never know why all of this is happening,” Magnus said. “If the vision is indeed from Angels, there must be a way to confirm this.”

All four of the Shadowhunters fell in quiet contemplation.

“You know…” Jace said after a few moments of silence. “I think there is one way we can make sure that these all came from Angels.”

“How?” Alec asked, frowning.

Jace stood up, energized. “Remember the place where we helped Angel _Ithuriel_ escape, Clary?” He smiled when he saw Clary nod her head hesitantly. “Remember how the angel shot up to the sky?”

“Yes…?” Clary said, uncertain where Jace was going with this.

“I bet there’s a scorched mark on the ground.” Jace was smug.

“Oh… oh!” Clary exclaimed. “Yes, of course! We can see whether the scorched mark matches with one we found around Alec that day.”

“That could work,” Magnus approved.

“Well, what are waiting for?” Isabelle demanded. “Let’s go now.”

“Wait a minute. I have potion brewing at this moment, Isabelle,” Magnus said calmly. “Let us wait for a while, you know, have a drink or two, until you all calm down. The potion won’t take long, give me half an hour.”

“You don’t have to come with us, Magnus.” Alec said, already feeling bad for intruding Magnus. He didn't know Magnus was in the middle of his work. “It’s just a site visit.”

“Yeah, Magnus,” Isabelle said. “We’ll come back and tell you what we found.”

“Nonsense,” Magnus’s voice was hard as steel, leaving no room for argument. “Half an hour, please.”

Magnus gestured all of them to sit down, flicking his fingers as four sets of hot tea appeared on the table. As Jace, Clary and Isabelle sat down, Magnus reached out to hold Alec’s hand. The dark-haired Shadowhunter turned around to face Magnus questioningly as the warlock pulled him slightly away from the others. Magnus looked at the way Alec’s brows furrowed in continuous worry of the current event before saying quietly, “It’ll be alright, Alexander. Trust me.”

Alec swallowed hard. He had always trusted Magnus with his life. That had never changed. Whenever he or his siblings were injured, he had always been willing to put his and his family’s life in Magnus’s hand. But to trust Magnus with his heart was an entirely different matter. History had his heart so broken and shredded and now it couldn't do anything except to shy away from Magnus’s reach. “I trust you with my life, Magnus, I always do,” Alec compromised instead - his fingers moved tentatively to weave between the warlock’s graceful ones in gratitude.

Magnus smiled sadly at the way Alec carefully chose his words. He was determined to make sure that one day Alec would trust him with his heart again. The moment was broken when Alec’s fingers touched one of Magnus’s rings.

And it happened again.

The vision hit him like a brick.

The feeling of darkness covering so suddenly him was familiar but no less shocking than before. The vision was shoved straight through his brain like a hot lance - sharp, sudden and utterly painful. With a loud gasp of pain, Alec stumbled back a few steps.

“Alexander...?” He heard Magnus’s voice sounded wary and uncertain. Remembering the last time that it happened, he tried to brace himself with the expected flurry of images. However, it seemed that the sender of the vision had learnt Alec’s limitation. Instead of image after incomprehensible image, this time, Alec was presented with just one, clear image - too stark, too forceful and just too much.

And Alec was introduced to a whole new world of pain.

His legs were unable to support him anymore - Alec fell and crouched on the floor - both hands clenched in tight fists as they braced on the floor. It was as if his brain was being skewered and twisted with burned metal blade. Tears unconsciously leaked from his eyes and blood began rushing out from his nose. Alec was left unaware of his surroundings.

He was unaware of the way Magnus called his name in horror - _Alexander! Alexander!_ -; he was unaware of Jace and Isabelle as they scrambled on their feet, rushing towards their brother; and he was unaware of the way Clare stood still in utter shock.

All he knew was the way pain encompassed him relentlessly. He couldn’t! He didn't think he could handle this kind of pain! Behind his closed eyes, Alec knew the pain wouldn’t relent unless he paid attention to the image that he was supposed to see. So, he tried to push aside the pain and forced himself to look at the vision.

In the vision he saw he was at the same tunnel/cave/underground as in the previous one. The surrounding was the same as before. And as before, he was standing at the edge of the huge hole and he could still see the shadow of someone at the other side of the gaping hole. This time however, instead of standing all by himself, he felt that there was someone beside him - someone familiar, comforting and supportive. It took a few moments for Alec to realise that there was a touch of that someone’s hand on his own shoulder. The touch felt electric, powerful - he felt something pulsing was channelling through him. Alec tried to turn his head. He wanted to see who was next to him.

But he couldn't. His concentration started to waver. The blinding pain once again overtook his focus and Alec let out the stuttering breath that he didn't realise was holding. It was getting too much for him to handle.

 _Oh Angels… please stop this_ , Alec prayed desperately … _please, please_ _stop this!_

And it instantaneously stopped, as if answering his prayer. As the pain released its claws off his head, Alec fell face down on the floor, clinging hard on the lasts of his consciousness.

Magnus dropped to his knees and pulled Alec close to him. His eyes were wild as the cat eyes made their appearance. His magic was barely controlled and air was full of magical statics that caused goose bumps amongst the rest of the Shadowhunters. Above the ceiling, lights flickered warningly.

Looking up at Jace, Magnus roared, “What the HELL was that?!”

Similarly distraught, Jace kneeled beside Alec. “That what was happened three days ago! But this time it is worse.”

“This was what happened? You didn't tell me that Alec would suffer like that!” Magnus said accusingly. Magnus could feel his heart race and his hands almost trembled in utter shock. He had never seen Alec in that level of pain before and Magnus didn't know if he could do it again. Judging by the fact that this was the second time it had happened, Magnus knew that this would not be a one-off event.

Alec let out a shuddering breath and groaned pitifully.

Quickly, Magnus turned Alec around. Gasps of surprise echoed in the room when they saw blood streaked down from Alec’s nose to his cheeks and neck. Alec’s half-lidded eyes were dazed and unseeing as fresh tear-tracks ran down along his temples. Magnus gritted his teeth; he was beyond angry and it frustrated him that he had no one to vent his anger to. Raising his hand, he flicked his fingers, and the blood stains and traces of tear disappeared within a second.

“Oh Alec…” Isabelle said, her voice thick with tears.

Ignoring the people around him, Magnus cradled Alec’s head in his arm and gently stroke the pale-white face with his fingers. Alec’s skin felt clammy to the touch.  “Alexander... _Darling_...  Open your eyes…”

Alec forced himself to be coaxed into consciousness despite his body begged him to just close his eyes and rest. But however tired he was, he couldn't - not yet - not until he had reassured his loved ones. “Let's- let's not do that again,” he gasped softly.

Magnus frowned at the lethargic way Alec looked at them. Clary didn’t say anything about Alec reacting like this the last he had the vision. It seemed that the tall Shadowhunter could barely keep his eyes opened. Worried, he raised his hand, tinted blue with magic, to once again to check Alec’s head, scanning for any residual injuries. “Alexander, stay with me… Are you hurt anywhere?”

“I'm fine…” Alec rasped. “I’m just tired… so, so tired....” and his head lolled back in Magnus’s arms, eyes closed.

“Alec!” Jace cried at his _parabatai_. A quick check showed that Alec had merely passed out and Jace let out a loud breath of relief.

Magnus pulled the unconscious man closer to him, seeking comfort from Alec. He willed his heart to slow down, taking in a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down. He noticed that Jace was also reluctant to let go his grip on Alec’s hand.

“Oh my God…” Clary spoke up finally, her eyes were still wide in horror. “ _Oh my God_ …”

* * * * * *

 


	4. When the Fires from Heaven burn, to whom will you turn?

 

* * *

_How much are you willing to pay?_

_For a glimpse of the things to come_

_Be it a coming revelry or a doomsday_

_So that you will be saved from harm._

_I did not ask for this gift that they bring_

_I did not wish for the future to be revealed_

_But if it were for me to save you from hurting_

_Then, in front of the misery, I shall kneel_

* * *

 

The building looked just as abandoned as the year before. Clary looked the unkempt surrounding, recalling that night when she and Jace snuck into the building to help Angel _Ithuriel_ escape. The whole situation had been so surreal, and to see a real angel shot up to the sky was as amazing as she had thought it would be. However, now, under the bright afternoon sun, the building no longer looked ominous; it was just like any other buildings. Jace stood close beside her and as always, the presence of the blond Shadowhunter comforted her.

“Nothing changes,” Jace remarked.

Clary just nodded her head.  Ahead of her was Magnus, following close to Alec as if yesterday’s incident had shaken the warlock so much that he could not let Alec wander too far from him. Clary remembered the way Magnus had surprisingly lifted the unconscious, six-foot Shadowhunter with such ease in a bridal style into his own master bedroom and gently put Alec on the bed. Magnus was adamant that they all waited until tomorrow to look at the building. For someone as intimidating as Magnus, it always amazed Clary to see just how gentle the warlock could be.

Clary wondered how two people could love each that much and be just friends. Even when Clary thought Jace was her brother, she could scarcely get her hands off him.

“I wonder why Alec receives the visions now?” Clary asked Jace. Isabelle had scouted a little bit further than all of them, just to see whether there was any danger. “When I received the runic visions, I understood it was because of Valentine’s threat to the world. But now is the time of peace and I haven't been receiving anymore runic visions. I assume that those visions are taken away because the threat is eliminated.”

“I don’t know why, Clary.” The frown on Jace’s face seemed to take permanent residence ever since Alec was being attacked almost two weeks ago. “I also don’t know why it is Alec who receives the visions. Why can’t it be you or me?”

Clary hastened her steps to follow Alec and Magnus and Jace followed suit. “Maybe there's something about Alec that none of us has.”

“What? His grumpy personality? His height?” Jace raised his eyebrows. Clary just rolled her eyes.

“Anyway, I think these visions are starting to take their toll on Alec,” Jace confided unhappily. “The last time he received this vision he hadn't fainted. But yesterday, he had lost consciousness for some time. Magnus said that he was just tired and needed the rest, but I can't shake this feeling of dread.”

“We'll just have to monitor him and support him in any way we can,” Clary assured Jace. “That's all we can do at this moment, you know, until we find out all the needed facts.”

Jace opened his mouth to reply when he heard Alec called them to be quick. Hearing his _parabatai’s_ grumpy voice made Jace’s lips quirk in familiar fond and he pulled Clary’s hand to run. Then, all four of them entered the building. It was as silent as tomb and any slightest sound made echoed in throughout the empty corridors.

A few seconds later, Isabelle’s footsteps were heard before the raven-haired Shadowhunter stood before them. “As far as I know, the building is empty,” Isabelle reported. “No demons, no Forsaken, just a few rats and bats. But Clary or Jace need to guide us to the place where you guys helped the angel.”

“Come on,” Jace said, taking the lead.

They walked through the building until they reached the stairs that led to the open space upstairs. Jace broke into a small run, pushed the door opened and waited until all of them followed through.

“This is it. Let's look for the scorched marks.” Jace said. At that, they all dispersed in separate directions.

It was Clary who found it. She called all her friends in her excited voice. “Look! There's the scorched mark!”

They all crowded around the marks. Sure enough, the scorched mark was identical to the ones found around Alec that day. The mark was tinted with faded orange and black.

It meant that two weeks ago, an angel swooped down upon Alec, pushed something inside his head that allowed him to receive visions of a cave/underground with a big, deep hole and vague messages. This confirmation was staggering, rendering all of them speechless.

A few moments later, it was Magnus who found his voice first. “If the angels wanted to communicate with Shadowhunters, why does he have to go through Alec? Why not Clary or Jace? They have the extra angel blood and the visions will not hurt them!” The anger in Magnus’s voice was unmistakable.

No one could answer Magnus.

No one could say anything. Because this discovery meant that the peace that they had right now might not last; the angels were warning them about something through Alec. And by the look of it, the angels were not finished with this.

“Let's get out of here.” Alec said suddenly; his tone was tense.  “We've got what we needed to know.”

“What? Alec!” Isabelle exclaimed. “This is huge. The angels are communicating with you. We need to figure this out!”

Alec’s hazel eyes flashed in frustration. “Figure what out, Izzy? How am I supposed to figure out what the angels want to tell me with two random visions of me standing in front of a hole?”

“I don't know, but there must be a reason why you keep seeing that.” Isabelle said.

“I don't see anything more than what I've told you. There's nothing about that place that I recognise. Not in a vision that lasts just a few seconds!”

“That's why you need to draw the second vision just like the first one. Maybe there's something that can help us understand,” Isabelle argued.

“No, no way,” Alec backed away. “There's no way I'm going to let anything possess me for any reason.”

“Magnus said that was not a possession!” Isabelle said pleadingly.

“It sure as hell felt like one,” Alec said flatly. Stubbornness lined along his rigid back.

“Alright, enough!” Magnus said suddenly. No one could love as fierce as the Lightwoods siblings. That kind of love always prone to explode as quickly as it would diffuse later. An amazing outcome, if anybody would ask Magnus, considering who their parents were. “Guys,” Magnus said to Jace, Clary and Isabelle. “If you would kindly give us a minute?”

Isabelle gave a pleading look at Magnus, asking the warlock to talk some sense to Alec, before stepping away.

Jace threw a concern look at Alec before following Isabelle and Clary. He knew Alec as well as he knew himself and right now, Alec was in panic. If anyone could persuade Alec to talk, it would be Magnus.

Magnus waited until the three Shadowhunters walked away before giving his attention to Alec. The man in front of him was clearly unhappy. Now that they had the needed privacy, Magnus asked Alec gently. “Talk to me, please. Tell me what's going on inside that pretty head.”

Alec paced back and forth in agitation. His body posture was tense, so taut that the whole body might snap. Magnus knew from experience that when Alec was like this, he was trying to find words to articulate his feelings. So, he waited patiently for Alec; he knew that pushing the tall Shadowhunters to talk would only drive him away.

A few more moments passed before Alec stopped his pacing to speak. “If Clary’s theory about these being prophetic visions from angels is true, it means that these visions will keep on coming until I understand the message, right?”

“Yes, that is likely to happen,” Magnus said carefully.

Alec bit his lips in unchecked panic. “I don't think I can do this.”

“Do what exactly?”

“I don't think I can handle receiving visions from any angel anymore.”

“Tell me why,” Magnus coaxed.

“I'm a soldier, Magnus. I have been thrown out, shot at, sliced or magicked. I have my bones broken more than once, my head concussed, arrows stuck in my body and even have an internal bleeding once. But nothing…” Alec stuttered as he tried to force the next words to come out. “...nothing hurts more than those visions…”

Realisation dawned on Magnus’s face. The expression on Alec’s face was not frustration or stressed -  it was utter fear. Alec feared the visions. His heart ached for Alec. “Oh, Alexander…”

“The pain of that few seconds hurt more than anything I have ever felt before,” Alec confessed. Alec knew if he was talking to Isabelle or Jace, the words would not have flowed easily. He would say he was fine. And he would not let any trace of fear bleed through his mask. It was hard to show any weakness to them when he had been taught all his life to be a leader and a protector. Hell, if he was still dating Magnus, Alec would probably be reluctant to say these words to Magnus too.

But in front of this Magnus? Magnus who was a mere friend? Words of fear and weakness came as easily as the flow of water through the river. With this Magnus, he didn't have to pretend to appear strong, to be worthy of being Magnus’s lover. He didn't have to tiptoe around their budding relationship, wondering where the limitations and the breaking points were. And he had meant it when he said he trusted Magnus with his life. So, words began to tumble out. “Izzy wanted me to understand the vision but how can I? I cannot sift through the pain to really see the vision. And- and if I were to really try to understand it, it would mean that I must be willing to suffer the pain longer than a few seconds.”

Swallowing hard, Alec looked down to the ground. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “By the Angels… I don't think I can do that.”

The vulnerability in Alec’s face was stark. By all the goods in the world, Magnus had never seen Alec this open, this unreserved before. Even when he had run to his loft’s balcony after Jocelyn death, Alec had remained so stoic. But something had changed when their relationship turned friendship. Magnus didn't know what but he also felt it. It was similar to that time when they had spent some time together in the new bar after interviewing Edward Stone. He had told Alec about how he loved his position as High Warlock due to the chance of being altruistic. That information was so uninteresting, so unlike the glamorous Magnus Bane that if they were still dating, Magnus didn't know if he would tell Alec. Maybe he would eventually as they progressed further into the relationship but not at this early stage of relationship, not when he still had to prove himself to Alec.

With everything that had happened - the war and everything - no wonder the fragile relationship didn't survive. But Magnus had learned his mistakes and he intended to do the right way this time.

Right now, Magnus’s heart tightened at the way Alec was fidgeting in his worries and fears. If Magnus had the will and the way, he wanted to gather Alec in his arms and protect the man for as long as he lived. He wanted to shelter him, to love him as he deserved and he wanted to indulge him with everything he wanted in this world. The urge to touch Alec was strong. So, Magnus gave in and held out his hands to offer Alec his comfort.

Alec hesitated for a while. If he gave in, this would be the first time he allowed Magnus to be so close to him after a long time. Nevertheless, he still succumbed to his need. He stepped inside Magnus’s space and shuddered out a long sigh when a pair of strong arms encircled him tightly and firmly. Alec didn’t realise how much he missed this – the warmth, the scent and the feeling of security.

Softly, Magnus said, “Alexander, I don't think you have any say as to whether you want to receive the visions or not. I want so very much to say that I know a way or a spell to block these visions but I will not lie to you, not now - not ever again.”

“Then what should I do?” His voice muffled against Magnus’s shoulder, his hands clenched tightly at Magnus’s arms.

“You are the bravest and the strongest person I have ever known. You often find courage in your need to protect people around you. And you will do everything that you can to make things right. I know this time will not be any different.” Magnus weaved his fingers through Alec’s messy hair in comfort. His heart ached at the softness of it as he reminisced the time when Alec was still his and Magnus had spent the nights on his bed with Alec resting so trustingly on his chest. In those nights, Magnus had felt peace like he never did before - like the hollow parts of his soul were slotted in by Alec’s love.

“Darling... I know you will find the needed courage. And I promise you that I will be there every step of the way.” Magnus said firmly.

Alec pulled back to look at Magnus. There was something so certain - something so old and wise -  in Magnus’s face that reassured him. Taking a deep breath, Alec nodded his head. Magnus signalled the rest of the gang to come forward.

Facing them, Alec scratched at the back of his head sheepishly. “Sorry you guys for that.”

Jace said nothing and simply pulled Alec in his arms. With their soul bonded over a sacred rune, words were no needed. Jace felt what Alec felt.

Smiling tremulously, Isabelle said, “So, what's our next step?”

“I was thinking about what you said,” Alec said tentatively. With the support of his family and friends, Alec pushed aside his fear. “About me drawing out the vision. I will do that, so that we can look at it together.”

Magnus smiled proudly at Alec that he felt his heart could burst. His brave Alexander never failed to amaze him.

“Yes,” Isabelle’s grip on her brother's hand was tight. “Yes, let’s do that.”

* * * * * *

“So, what's going to happen now?” Jace asked.

Alec looked up at Jace from his seat and shrugged. “The last time it happened, I was holding the pencil and just… I don't know, drew.”

“No incantation, no drawing pentagram on the floor?” Jace asked, smirking.

Alec just raised his eyebrows and raised a middle finger. Isabelle saw the gesture and slapped her brother's shoulder. “Stop it.”

“He started it,” Alec said lamely.

“Yeah, Alec, stop it.” Jace mimicked.

“And you need to stop being a pain in the ass,” Isabelle pointed out.

“Boys…” Clary shook her head.

Then, Magnus walked into the room, bringing drawing pads with several charcoal pencils. “I am not sure the size of the drawing you're planning to make, so I brought different sizes.”

Jace’s eyes widened at the biggest drawing pad that Magnus brought it. “Hopefully not that one. We're going to be here forever, bored to death, just waiting Alec to finish.”

Magnus rolled his kohl-lined eyes. “Please, my house is more entertaining than your gloomy Institute.”

Alec stood up and picked out a medium size drawing pad and the pencil. Then, he sat back down. The drawing pad sat on his lap and his hand was poised to draw.

“So?” Jace said impatiently.

“Really, Jace?” Magnus crossed his arms across his chest. “He just picked up the pencil two seconds ago. Even summoning things take longer than that.”

As the comforting sound of the people he loved bickering at the background, Alec took a deep breath of much needed courage and closed his eyes to remember his vision. Once he recaptured the image in his head, Alec opened his eyes and tentatively began moving his hand to draw. Alec willed the image in his head to be illustrated on the blank drawing pad.

Just as before, Alec slowly released the control of his hand as he immersed himself in the details of his vision.

He remembered the second vision quite clearly. In it, the surrounding and the setting were still the same but it was the new figure beside him - the someone that he hadn’t had the chance to really look at his face - that was the new addition to his second vision. Alec tried to capture the lines of the figure’s fingers on his shoulder. He tried to illustrate the sparks of power that travelled from the figure’s hand to Alec’s shoulder. He tried to illustrate how the fingers were long and strong and how familiar the touch felt to him.

As Alec drew furiously, all four people that stood around him fell in awed silence. Magnus and Jace exchanged a disbelief look at the way Alec’s eyes looked distant; like Alec was not in the room but instead he was seeing something far away. But Alec showed no signs of classic possession. If Magnus were asked to describe Alec right now, he would say that Alec’s hands were being _guided_ to move in purposeful and precise manners while Alec’s eyes were looking at something that no one could see.

Clary looked at the way Alec draw and she had never seen anyone draw the way that Alec drew. There was no planning involved, no emotions on the painter’s face and instead of being immersed in the painting, Alec was lost somewhere in his mind. As the drawing took shape, Clary knew that Alec couldn’t have drawn that on his own - somebody or something was helping him.

For the next half an hour, there were no sound to be heard except for the scrapping of the charcoal against the thick paper. They stood motionless, watching avidly as Alec drew almost in a furious manner. It was as if all of them was holding one large breath, waiting for Alec to finish. Eventually Alec’s hands slowly stopped moving, his hunched back straightened and the tense on his shoulders relaxed. Magnus could practically pinpoint the exact moment when awareness returned to Alec’s eyes. He knew Alec had finally finished drawing.

“Wow…” Jace breathed. Magnus silently agreed. The way Alec drew was something he had never seen in his long life. Magnus had seen countless possessions but this… this was something else.

Alec looked down at his drawing as if he was looking at it for the first time. _In a way_ , Magnus thought, _Alec does see it for the first time._ Magnus watched the hazel eyes widen in surprise at his own work.

“That’s not my doing,” Alec said automatically.

“Brother, that was you,” Isabelle said. “We saw you draw it. It wasn’t a possession at all. I don’t know what that was.” The awe was clear in Isabelle’s voice. Clary nodded in agreement, equally impressed.

Magnus summoned Alec’s previous drawing with a click of his fingers and placed it beside the current one. He then let out a short, disbelief laugh. “Look! Both drawings are impossibly identical except for the additional silhouetted figure beside whom I assume to be Alec. How can two, hand-drawn drawings be completely indistinguishable?”

Alec just shook his head - his hands trembled slightly at the whole situation. He clenched his hands into tight fists, willing them to stop shaking.

“Are we to assume an angel inspired Alec with these drawings?” Clary said thoughtfully.

“This is more than an inspiration,” Jace said. “This is like a whole new ability.”

“Look,” Alec said as he suddenly stood up. He stopped himself from wrapping his arms around himself defensively; a habit he had when he was really under stress. “Can we just look at the drawing and- and see what we’re missing?”

All of them sobered up, realising that this was not a good time to be gushing about this thing. So, Magnus put up both drawings on the softboard side by side for easy comparison and study. A few seconds later, Isabelle spoke up, “This whole place… I don’t think it is in subway tunnel or city underground. It doesn’t look man-made.”

Clary and Jace nodded in agreement.

“A cave?” Alec asked. “Here?”

“Or it could just easily be a really abandoned tunnel,” Magnus shrugged. “New York is a very old city.”

“And what about this new figure beside Alec here?” Jace asked. He brought his head closer to the drawing, trying to see the detail of the man - _definitely_ a man - beside Alec.

“In the first vision, there is Alec-” Jace pointed at the drawing. “-and there's this one shadowed person at the other side of the rift.” Jace’s finger stabbed at the other part of the drawing. “On the second vision, the setting is the same except this additional person beside Alec. I think there must a reason why Alec didn’t see the man in his first vision.”

“I wish we know what triggers these visions,” Magnus mused, his ringed forefinger tapped at his chin. “Maybe it will tell us why certain vision changes.”

“It's just that, both of visions provide us with not enough clue on which way to proceed.” Isabelle said in frustration. “If we could see any notable marks, maybe we could identify the place.”

“Not only that, we are also unsure of that what the threat is, what are we supposed to prevent from happening and most of all, who are all these people that Alec kept seeing in his visions.” Clary added.

“And why can’t Alec see them? I mean if the Angels are trying to convey something, why hide the players in Alec’s visions? Why are all this vagueness?” Jace said. “Wouldn’t it be easier if they just show everything clearly and then we can do some facial recognition or something.”

“Maybe it’s because I can’t seem to be conscious long enough to see them.” Alec shrugged carelessly and then, winced at Isabelle’s apparent outrage at Alec’s glibness. “Sorry but all these conjectures are pointless.” Alec said hastily.

“I agree,” Magnus said. “Without context of the whole situation, it is impossible to say with any degree of certainty how all of these are connected. We are only seeing parts of the whole story.” Then, the warlock bit his lips in indecision. “I hate to say this more than you could ever know, Alexander, but I think we need more visions from the angel.” The pain in Magnus’s eyes was clear.

Alec’s body automatically tensed at Magnus’s words. But no matter how much he wished it to be otherwise, Alec knew that there was no other way but to face the pain. This was the first time in his life that Alec feared pain. This was the threshold that Alec never knew he would find. But when he looked at his family and friends, he also knew that it didn't matter at all because for them, Alec would create new threshold. Taking a deep breath, Alec said, “I know, Magnus.”

The pride he saw in Magnus, Jace and Isabelle’s eyes was all the strength that Alec needed.

* * * * * * *  

Ever since Alec had accepted the fact that he was receiving visions (prophetic or not, it was still debatable) from angel, he had lived every day in silent wariness. It was as if he was bracing himself for the next vision to come. But as luck would have it, Alec had spent the whole week vision-free and more importantly, pain-free. Instead of making him happy, the waiting period was nerve-wrecking and Alec would rather have the vision now and be done with it. To cope with the uncertainty, he had spent the week sparing with his _parabatai_ , training Clary, calling Magnus and letting Magnus pay for their evening excursions at bars.

Magnus was so persuasive in coaxing him to accompany the warlock to the bars. This whole vision thing made Alec simply want to hide in the Institute and wallow. The thought he had no control over this made him angry and scared because what if he had a vision in the middle of having a meeting? What if The Clave found out about this? The Clave was so traditional in everything and anything that seemed so out-of-this-world could make The Clave lashed out at him in a way that made Alec shudder. This was one of the reasons why Alec didn’t report any of these events to The Clave. Magnus knew he would react like this; he knew that Alec would hide behind the walls of the Institute and the mask of a Head of Institute. So, the High Warlock called him to go with him to every new bar that was recently opened in this city on the pretence of trying the new pool tables. Alec thought of refusing at first but the way Magnus spun his temptations caused Alec to give in every single time.

He knew on the first day when they agreed to become friends that he would lose out on this deal; that he could never teach his heart to consider Magnus as a mere friend. And the more he spent time with Magnus, rediscovering him all over again, Alec didn’t fall out of love - he impossibly fell deeper in love.

In those evening outings, they played a few games of pool before finding an empty table, ordering drinks and simply… talked.  Magnus was adept in manoeuvring stilted conversations, shifting from one topic to another, persuading the introvert in him to contribute to the conversations. Eventually, they found the rhythm between them and as the minutes turned into hours, Alec lost his awkwardness and Magnus lost his flamboyant persona. And what was left was two men, talking about their pasts, their interests and their aspirations. It was from there Alec could finally pinpoint what attracted him to Magnus. He found Magnus’s beauty was not just on the surface but so much more exquisite underneath the make-up and the fashionable clothes. Oh, how Alec loved the way Magnus took care of his people, how patient he was with people demanding his services right and left, how his voice never risen even when he was deeply frustrated or annoyed, how Alec could see the affections and love in those eyes to the people that Magnus deemed as his, and most of all, Alec loved how powerful and so self-assured Magnus was.

Alec wanted to be the recipient of love from that kind of man. He wanted so much to reach back to Magnus. But every time he opened his mouth to tell that to Magnus, his brain vindictively reminded him of those painful nights he spent alone; those painful nights he was drown in utter despair. How it took him a long time to reconstruct his masks and shields to even function as the Head of Institute. His brain told him yes, it felt so good to be loved but it also told him to remember the pain that love could also bring. So, he shut his mouth once again, cursing himself to be so coward and indecisive.

He didn’t know what it would take to make him let go his fear.

But in between those times, Alec spent his time in the Institute, nervously waiting. Without distractions from Jace and Magnus, Alec was brimmed with such restlessness that one day, after the morning meeting, Alec reached for his leather jacket together with his _stele_ and _witchlight_ and decided to go for a long walk.  

He let his feet wander, not having any specific destination. He thought briefly of calling Magnus for a company but the warlock had been spending so much time on him already and Alec didn’t want to disturb him for a reason as stupid as accompanying him for a walk. So, Alec headed to the east of Brooklyn, with half-a-mind to check if there was any demon activity.

The decrease in demonic attacks after Alec had interviewed Edward Stone was awfully suspicious. But without any concrete proof, there was nothing Alec could do. The whole thing might simply be coincidence. After wandering around the area, he concluded that there was nothing out of ordinary.

“Hello, Alec,” he heard suddenly and Alec quickly turned his body around. There, stood a tall man in his impeccable suit like he was stuck in early 1900. But somehow, Edward Stone made it look so effortless.

“Mr. Stone,” Alec greeted. _Thinking of a devil and here he is._ Alec thought amusedly.

“Call me Edward, please. Are you here for a Shadowhunter business?”

“Ah, no,” Alec smiled. “Just taking a stroll in the neighbourhood.”

Edward smiled back and Alec reluctantly admitted that Edward Stone was quite a good-looking man. While Magnus had always been the one with beautiful cat eyes and unbearable handsome face in Alec’s mind, there was something classically appealing at the way Edward’s jet-black hair was slicked back, the way his equally dark eyes seemed so wise and the way his jawline framing the thin, strong lips. Alec had always been attracted to powerful men and Edward was no different.

“If you are here for a leisure purpose, may I accompany you in your walk?” Edward asked charmingly.

Alec looked at his surroundings. There were a few people around and the day had inched towards evening. He didn’t realise that he had been out that long. “Sure, why not.”

“I haven’t seen you for nearly two weeks. How things have been going?” Edward said as they walked side by side.

“Things have been... unexpected,” Alec said cautiously. “But nothing that I can’t handle.”

“And the demonic attacks?”

Alec looked at Edward, trying to gauge at his expression. “Surprisingly, reduced to almost none. Quite a coincidence, right?”

“Alec,” Edward said slowly. “I have nothing to do with the attacks.”

Alec sighed. Something about Edward felt unsettling. However, he detected no traces of guilt in Edward’s face. The earnest way Edward said he had nothing to do with the attack was too compelling. “And I have nothing to hold you against. There’s nothing I can accuse you of doing.” Alec said truthfully. “So, don’t worry.”

Edward nodded, accepting Alec’s words graciously. They spent a few more moments of silence walking side by side.

“You know,” Edward said thoughtfully. “I thought you would call me.”

Alec frowned in confusion before stopping abruptly as he suddenly remembered the flirty call card. His cheeks began to flush in crimson red and his tongue was tied. He couldn’t believe he had forgotten about the card! Alec’s reaction to his words caused Edward to throw his head back and laughed. “You found my card and you’ve forgotten about it. I’m hurt, Alec,” he teased.

“I- I,” Alec stammered. Nothing could turn him into a stuttering idiot faster than realising someone was showing interest in him.

Edward saw how uncomfortable Alec was when he realised somebody was flirting with him. And it continued to charm the warlock. Alec was calm and confident when he was addressed professionally but when he was being flirted, he immediately turned into shy and awkward young man. Had Edward met a Shadowhunter like Alec Lightwoods? In his long, long life, he was sure he had not. An ordinary Shadowhunter was usually cool, hard-hearted and often quoted _the law is hard, but it is the law_ to justify his actions. A Shadowhunter didn’t act like Alec did.

Alec was blunt in his words. He was confident but not prideful. He said what he thought but never bordering to rudeness. And Alec had surprisingly low self-image, considering the way he look. Who could see Alec - tall, dark messy hair, piercing hazel eyes with soft, romantic lips - and was not attracted to him? Edward didn’t know where Alec’s sense of inferiority came from.

“It’s okay, Alec. I could imagine how busy you were for the past two weeks.” Edward assured. “I suppose we can try again.” With that, the warlock raised his hand and with a small greenish spark, a new call card appeared between his fingers. Then, he flipped the card and presented it to Alec playfully.

Alec blushed as he took the card. He looked at gold-printed name and phone number on the card. And all of a sudden, he was thinking about Magnus and how much he had missed the warlock. Even after all those months, Alec’s heart still yearned for Magnus. No matter how much he had been burnt and hurt by Magnus, Alec didn’t think anyone could take his place. Oh, he could try lying to himself by thinking he was content with Magnus as a friend but after spending a couple of weeks with him and rediscovering him, Alec knew there was no getting over the warlock.

Alec knew all that and that caused the possibility of a new relationship to bring a lump in his throat. Before he knew it, Alec found himself saying, “I think I should warn you that I was recently heartbroken and I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for anything else.”

Edward raised his eyebrows at Alec’s blunt admission. The young Shadowhunter’s honesty kept surprising him. “How recent ago, Alec?” He asked gently.

“Almost five months ago.” He said quietly.

“Hey, look at me,” Edward said. Alec looked away from the card and up at Edward’s face. “I like you, Alec. A hundred years being shut out from society and then, five minutes into knowing you, I know without a doubt that I like you. You are so unlike any Shadowhunter that I have encountered.” Edward raised his fingers to stroke Alec’s cheeks lightly. Alec instinctively moved slightly away from the unexpected touch. “How about you give me a call - whenever you are ready - and we’ll see how things will go. It doesn’t have to be anything.”

Alec bit his lips. He didn’t want to explain to Edward, who was practically a stranger to him, who Magnus was to him. He didn’t want to start all over again with somebody else. How was he supposed to teach his heart to do anything when it couldn’t even handle the sight of Magnus smiling at him? He was numb and indecisive; continually trapped in a limbo. He wanted to accept Magnus’s offer of reconciliation but at the same time, he _didn’t_ want to be opened to such vulnerability ever again.

Alec never thought himself as courageous. _This_ only proved his claim even more.

So, he simply said, “Alright,” and Alec slipped the call card at the back packet of his jeans.  

“Now that all my intentions have been put out forward, would you like to go for a drink?” Edward said brightly. “Just drink. Nothing more.”

“I think I should, you know, go,” Alec said hesitantly.

“Well, if that’s what you want, I can open a portal back to your Institute.” The smile on the warlock’s face didn’t even falter at Alec’s decline.

Alec relented and Edward opened the portal. Just as Alec started to step into it, Edward called his name. Alec turned around. “I want you to know that I am serious in my intention to get to know you. However long it takes for you get over him or her, I will wait for you.” The warlock said gently.  “So, call me, please,”

Alec swallowed tightly at Edward’s words. With his current problem of trying to get over Magnus - more likely he would fail - and of trying to understand the onslaught of visions from angels, Alec thought that Edward would probably have to wait a very long for him. But, he didn’t want to say anything in return, so, Alec simply curved up a small smile before walking into the portal.

 _If only I could find out where the vision takes place, half of my problem would probably be solved._ Alec thought sourly. When he stumbled out of the portal, the first thing he realised was that this was not the Institute. Alec blinked his eyes to adjust to the sudden darkness. “What…?” Alec breathed, startled. Behind him, the portal door vanished; clearly Edward Stone thought that Alec had safely arrived.

“Where am I?” Alec said to no one. His voice echoed slightly. “How did I get here?”

Alec took out his witchlight and held it higher. With the help of the white light emitted from his witchlight, Alec looked at his surroundings. _Strange…_ Alec thought. _This place looks awfully familiar._ As he wandered around, he studied the place. He was definitely in somewhere close-off and judging from the way the small slivers of sunlight that intruded in the darkened area, Alec thought maybe he was deep inside a cave, instead of being completely underground.  

He took a few more minutes looking around. Until suddenly his feet stopped on a particular spot that was definitely, _definitely_ familiar to him. He had been to his place before, he knew it. Alec turned his body around until he had found the perfect angle and then, he gasped loudly in realisation.

He was in the exact place in his vision! This was the exact spot where the huge rift would eventually be opened in front of him and on the other side of the rift was an unknown person - holding the rift opened? Trying to close the rift? Alec couldn’t be sure. And according to his second vision, there would be a third person, standing beside him.

Instinctively, Alec turned his head and was strangely disappointed to see there was no one beside him now. What was he thinking? He was alone right now. This was not the vision that he saw. However, this place was real; what he saw in his visions was real. And if he had any doubt about his vision being prophetic before, by being here, in the place where he had never been before - by the angel, he didn’t even know where he was! - effectively wiped off his doubts.

“Wow…” Alec whispered, letting out a short, crazed laugh. “Who would have thought… I am a freaking _seer._ ”

He didn't know how he got here from Edward's portal. Portals only worked if a person had already been to the place and had already known the location of the said place. And Alec had not for both reasons. How was he able to redirect Edward's portal to a place that he didn't know and hadn't been to?

He was about to pull out his phone to call Jace or Isabelle and tell them about his discovery, when he saw something on the ground. He knelt and brought his witchlight closer to the ground. Alec wasn’t sure what he was seeing but it looked like a man-made drawing. It was drawn in strange-like ink; the ink was black and gooey and looked kind of fresh. Alec frowned. Against his better judgement, he tentatively touched the black substance.

The vision from angel struck him unexpectedly.  

Like a hot knife suddenly stabbed into his head.

By the heaven… Alec gasped. A week without the visions and he had already forgotten how the pain felt. He wasn’t sure, but he felt that each time the vision struck him, instead of being accustomed to the pain, the pain intensified. This time, the pain raised to another notch that caused Alec, who was already on his knees, to grasp his head with both of his hands and let out an uncontrollable cry of pain. Behind the tightly closed eyes, Alec couldn’t stop the tears of pain from leaking at the way the vision violated his mind like a searing hot iron poker scrambling his brain.

If this was the first Alec received the vision, he would surely be totally derailed by the pain. But now, even through the loud pain, Alec remembered Magnus’s words, asking him to bear with the pain and see the vision a bit longer next time. So, he gritted his teeth hard, trying so very much to hold the pain at bay and forced himself to look at the image longer this time.

This time in his vision, all the previous details were there - the rift, him on one side of the rift, a shadowed person on the other side of the rift and the familiar person on Alec’s side. Now, the angel added another information; in this image, from where he was standing, the rift was rippling with energy and he saw something was pushing its way through the rift. Something that was so big and powerful that in this vision, Alec could see the ground shook. There was also a great roar coming out of the rift - the echo of it caused the roofs and walls of this cave trembling.

From the corner of his mind, Alec could already feel the vision was losing its clarity as the pain in his head screamed louder and more insistent. Alec could feel himself starting to succumb to the onslaught of pain.

But Alec made a promise to see the vision longer. And, by Angel _Raziel_ , he would try!

So, he clumsily wiped away the blood at his nose, bit his lips hard, taking a deep breath and tensing his body tight before plunging himself deeper into the image to see clearer. He needed to see what kind of creature that was trying to invade into this world. The vision that was faded just now, was once again clear and Alec was once again immersed in the future image.

He saw something shoot out of the rift. There was a loud sound of roar followed by the sound of huge wings being flapped. Alec could feel his heart thundered in trepidation at the sound. From where he was standing, a huge humanoid creature with two sets of great wings; sharp and long claws protruded from its two sets of hands and feet, was hovering above the rift. In one of its hands was a long staff. The creature looked even worse than it sounded and in all his life, Alec had never seen a demon that huge. Alec focused on the creature, memorising the way the creature looked. He took special notice on all of its distinguished marks.

His head was splitting insistently; it could no longer be ignored. He distantly felt his lips bled from biting too hard and his nose renewed its bleeding. _This is too much…_ Alec thought… The vision was too much on his body. Surely this was enough. _Oh Angel… please, let this be enough._

Alec released the hold he had over the vision like he was releasing a hot coal from his blistering hand. The vision dissipated and Alec let his head drop with his hand shakily braced from falling completely on the ground. He kept his eyes closed, wheezing and gasping, as the lingering pain suffocated him.  He could hear blood dripping from his nose.

“Shit…” Alec breathed. How he _hated_ these visions. “ _Shit…_ ”

He took a few minutes to get his bearing. The tiredness began to pull him under and Alec knew within seconds he would lose his consciousness. He needed to tell somebody about his whereabout. Slipping his shaky hand inside his pocket jeans, he reached for his phone before blindly pressed the last number that he had called. Anybody would do!

He pressed the call button when suddenly the second vision hit him.

“What…?” Alec gasped in utter shock and the phone fell on the ground as it was ringing. “No, no, no, _no_ …”

The second vision hit like tidal waves, strong and relentless. It caused Alec to turn around and lie on his back - his back arched in renewed pain and he let out blood-curdling scream. Like a shot down soldier being trampled again and again by his enemy’s foot, Alec couldn’t find any respite from insistent pain.

He was already so exhausted from the previous vision and now, the second vision compelled his body to forgo any intention to shut down. The waves of pain shocked his system to accept the new vision and Alec had no other option but to use the lasts of his strength to sift through the pain and focused on the image. He knew that if he didn’t, the pain would not stop.

Behind his eyes, he saw himself, raising his hands up high in the air. There was some kind of energy pulsing through his fingers; the energy with the combined colour of red and gold was rushing out uncontrollably like waterfall. From where he stood, he could feel the ground shook violently underneath his feet from the deafening sound of the demon roaring angrily. It took him a while to realise that the red and gold energy was somehow restraining the huge demon. Something came out from his hands; something that was so powerful that it could hold that intimidating demon back.

He tried to see the rest of the vision. But he couldn’t.

Alec was losing his fight against the pain and exhaustion. Everything was too much for him. The pain, the strain and the exhaustion were too much for him. In the last few moments of his consciousness, Alec could see/feel the red and gold energy didn’t just originate from him - there was someone? people? behind him. Alec couldn’t see him/her/them. Frankly, he didn’t care. Darkness swiftly swept him into the blissful oblivion.

And he knew nothing more.

 


	5. How far will you go, to offer protection to the protector?

 

* * *

_There were so many times when I wished,_

_I could take back all my vicious actions;_

_And to make you understand those were unleashed,_

_From my bleeding heart and self-preservation._

_But don’t you know, darling, about taking chance?_

_About how love and hurt are barbs in a same feather;_

_One can both be happy and sad in this life’s dance,_

_And only by learning to embrace both will bound us together._

* * *

Jace walked into the Institute in high spirit that evening. A good demon hunt always cheered him up. Behind him, Clary followed with a deep sense of amusement. Both of them were a little bit tired but were extremely satisfied from the afternoon assignment. After last week’s revelation of Alec’s visions were originated from angel and to see Alec’s incredible drawing session, a week of temporary peace was always a good news in her book. Ever since she became a Shadowhunter almost two years ago, Clary had learned to find and appreciate even a miniscule of good news amongst the heap of bad ones.

Life as a Shadowhunter might not be easy but Clary would gladly bear all of that if it meant she would have Jace in her life. Something in life simply couldn’t be compared with any other things. Clary’s priority would always be Jace.

“You are so easy to please,” Clary teased as she put away her blades. Jace threw a confident smirk over his shoulder before pulling Clary’s hand towards him. Laughing like a pair of children, they broke into a small run through the Institute.     

“Where’s Izzy and Alec?” Clary asked breathlessly when they stopped in the training room.

“I think Izzy say something about being in the lab. Alec called me this afternoon, saying he’s taking the rest of the day off.” Jace shrugged carelessly. “I suppose he is in his room brooding.”

“Yeah?” Clary smiled, excited at the prospect of having Jace all by herself for the rest of the evening as well.

“Yeah,” Jace echoed. “Why, do you have something on your mind?” A soft, fond smile appeared on Jace’s handsome face. It was times like these that Clary cherished; the tender moments that they shared in between those whirlwind times as Shadowhunters.

“I was thinking-” Clary started before Jace’s phone rang. She sighed at the interruption but still, she nodded her head, telling him to answer the call first.

“Hold that thought,” Jace teased as he raised his phone to look at the name. The word _Alec_ flashed. Huffing a small laugh, Jace pressed the answer button. Alec probably had finished his brooding and tried to determine his whereabouts. Such a mother-hen.

As soon as Jace put the phone on his ear, he nearly dropped it when a heart-stopping and chilling scream filled his ear. “ALEC!” Jace cried, his heart immediately pounded a hundred miles per hour as his hands felt cold in sudden fear.

“Alec! Alec! Answer me!” Jace shouted to the phone as his feet moved without him realising. He kept the phone pressed to his ear as he broke into a frantic run towards Alec’s room. A hundreds different scenarios were playing in his head right now and none of them was reassuring. Behind him, Clary followed him close, equally concern.

The blond Shadowhunter slammed Alec’s door open and was momentarily stunned when he saw the room was vacant. The tidiness of the room told Jace that Alec was never in his room since this morning. When Alec called him earlier about taking the rest of the day off, Jace didn’t think he meant going out of the Institute alone!

 _Of all the irresponsible, unthinkable actions Alec could have taken…_ Jace thought when suddenly over the phone line, Alec’s screams had ceased. Instead, Jace heard him gasp and wheeze in utter pain. Jace knew without a doubt from that familiar sounds that Alec was receiving a vision. After witnessing Alec receiving the vision twice, Jace had often wondered why his _Parabatai_ rune couldn’t feel Alec’s pain. Was it because the pain came from angels? And was it because something in Jace - the extra angel’s blood, perhaps - made him immune to such pain?

“Clary! Go and find Izzy, please,” Jace said; panic barely contained.

Clary nodded before asking, “What are you going to do?”

“Somebody must know where Alec had gone,” Jace answered before running off.

Jace kept the phone on his ear as he spent a few quick, frantic moments asking around. He was torn between despair and anger when one of the Shadowhunters told him that Alec had gone out for a walk. Alec had taken with him a _stele_ and _witchlight_ and said that he would be back soon. _Soon, my ass!_ Jace growled under his breath. But there was no destination mentioned by Alec and that made Jace’s anger simmer in worry and fright.

“Jace! What’s wrong?!” Isabelle ran towards him, her dark hair flew behind him. Her huge dark eyes clouded with trepidation. Beside her, Clary stood with her lips gnawed in equal worry.

“That fool! That idiot!” Jace snarled, breathless. “He left the Institute and didn’t tell anyone where he was going! I’m going to kill him!”

“Alec?” Isabelle gasped. “I was in the lab the whole day! I thought he was here!”

Jace thrusted his phone towards Isabelle, pressing a loudspeaker button. Immediately the sounds of Alec breathing in absolute pain broadcasted. “Listen to this! He is having a vision in the middle of nowhere ALONE!” He shouted; his face was red in anger.

Isabelle and Clary’s eyes widened in shock. “What?”

“And no one in this goddamn building knows where he is!” Jace was shaking. The thought of his _parabatai_ suffering and vulnerable was bad enough. The thought of him dealing with all that alone was more than unbearable.

“Well then, track him!” Clary cried. Isabelle shot out towards the training room to bring back Alec’s bow.

“Here!” Isabelle said, her dark eyes were wild as she hold Jace’s phone.

Jace closed his hands around the bow, trying to concentrate on the Alec’s energy. But he couldn’t; he was always a better tracker if Alec was with him. When he tried to track, his sensor simply dissipated when it reached at certain distance. He shook his head in frustration, “We need a warlock’s tracking. It’s stronger!”

So, Clary pulled her own phone out to call Magnus. As she talked to Magnus, terse and serious, the gasps that echoed from Jace’s phone went silent suddenly. Jace and Isabelle exchanged grim looks. If Alec followed the pattern of his last vision, the vision had stopped and Alec probably had lost consciousness.

In the middle of nowhere.

Vulnerable for any attack.

Without Jace there to protect him.

Jace’s hand was raised to clutch at his own chest. Was this how it felt having a heart attack? Because Jace could have sworn his heart shrunk in utter fear. He couldn’t breathe. His sight grew dimmed. Jace felt his knees weakened and he bent down, gasping for breath. His _parabatai_ was in danger, he didn’t even know where Alec was and he was having a freaking panic attack in the middle of the Institute corridor.

“Jace,” A voice called to him firmly. “Jace! Come on!”

Jace looked up and saw Magnus. The warlock was looking down at Jace – his face grim and his usual warm, brown eyes were tinged with yellow; a testament of how close Magnus was to losing his control as well. “Magnus?” Jace gasped. “How… when?” _How does Magnus get here?_

“We’ll find him, Jace.” Magnus promised fiercely. There was an underlying panic in his voice and fear made Magnus’s eyes look wild. “But I need you here and whole. Come on!”

Clary took his hand and guided him to the closest empty room, closing the door behind her. All four of them gathered around. Jace took deep breaths to find his bearing and to calm himself. He could feel Clary’s hand tighten around his own hand in unconditional support and love and slowly, Jace regained his feet on the shaky ground.

“The bow, Isabelle,” Magnus held out his hand. Isabelle passed Alec’s bow. The warlock began to concentrate on the bow. His hands glowed. It took a few seconds before Magnus gasped and said, “Found him!” With that he waved his hand to open the portal.

But something strange happened. Magnus’s portal sparked uncontrollably before dissipated into nothingness. Magnus frowned before trying again.

“Magnus, what’s wrong?” Isabelle asked when he failed the second attempt.

“Wherever Alec is, the place is warded against any portal.” Magnus said in frustration. “I can’t open the portal that leads to Alec.”

“Warded…? Like our Institute? But that would mean…” Isabelle’s words trailed off.

“It means a warlock has put a ward around that place.” Magnus’s voice was of a thunder, waiting to be let loose. The thought of another warlock, his own people, shielding Alec for sinister reasons made Magnus very angry. “We need to get there in a conventional method.”  

“Conventional method? You mean we need to walk there?!” Jace cried in disbelief. “How far is this place anywhere? Can't we just portal to the nearest location then walk there?”

Magnus looked at Jace as if he was dense. “I can only portal you to places that I know of the exact location. But tracking requires me to follow the energy. If I can't open the portal directly to Alec’s location, then I need to follow it.”

“What about Clary’s portal rune?” Isabelle asked. “Clary and Jace used that portal rune to bypass warlocks’ Shadowhunter ward when they went to Idris.”

Magnus flinched inwardly. Those were times he wasn’t proud of. And the fact that he didn’t tell the Shadowhunters about the fatal consequence of their ward should any angel-blooded person go through it was the shame that he would carry until he died. He didn’t know what was thinking at that time. It didn’t matter how angry he was; he should not put any Shadowhunters – Alec, specifically – in danger. He was still surprise that among all things Alec feared at him, this was not one of it.

Magnus knew he needed to talk to Alec about this, before the guilt ate him alive.

“I need to know where I am going,” Clary replied helplessly, wishing so hard that she could help. “I have been to the Lake Lyn before, so, I kind of knew the place. I can’t track and then portal to that place, like Magnus did. It’s beyond me.”

“So what now?” Jace said sarcastically. “If we can’t walk, we need to take a cab?”

They all looked at each other before Magnus shrugged his shoulders in acquiescence hesitantly. “Seriously?” Jace’s eyes bugged out.

“Come on, come on,” Isabelle said, pushing everybody out of the room. “What are we waiting for?” And they were off.

The journey towards Alec took quite some time. When they got on the cab, Clary kept throwing concern looks at Jace and Magnus. Jace was fidgeting nervously as he kept trying to call Alec’s phone. But it remained unanswered, which gave Jace no reassurance whatsoever. Magnus, on the other hand, had sat at the front, directing the cab driver to wherever his tracking guided him. The bow was still within his grip but it was glamoured against the mundane cab driver. On the surface, Magnus had looked calm but Clary didn't miss the tightness of his jaw and the barely held back anger and fear in his face. Magnus looked ready to snap at the slightest provocation and Clary prayed that it wouldn't happen.

They drove across the Brooklyn to the east side and then got off somewhere at an isolated park.  Magnus paid the cab and without waiting for the change, he concentrate on his tracking. His quick steps broke into a sprint as if he was following an invisible line that guided him directly to Alec. The other Shadowhunters ran after the warlock anxiously.

“Look! There's some sort of opening,” Isabelle said after a few minutes.

Magnus looked ahead and sure enough, the tracking brought them into the cave. “What is Alec doing in there?” Magnus asked bewildered.

“He went in there alone?” Jace said outraged. “I'm going to kill him, I'm going to kill him DEAD!”

“Not if I got to him first,” Magnus growled as he stomped his way into the opening; air crackling with unrestrained magic at each step. “Clary.” He said to the redhead, urging her to open an angelic portal to allow them to get through the warlock ward surrounding the cave.

Isabelle and Clary looked at each other in utter exasperation at both men’s ridiculous level protectiveness before Clary hastily drew a portal rune on the air and quickly followed them through the portal.

They had to venture a little bit further inside the cave with Magnus in the lead. A few minutes later, Magnus saw a body lie motionlessly on the ground and he knew it was Alec. He would know Alec anywhere.

“Alexander!” Magnus threw the bow down before running towards the man.

There was Alec, lying on his back, completely senseless. His face was frighteningly pale and unhealthy. His sunken eyes were streaked with dried tears with trails of blood from his nose. His cheeks were smeared with wiped-away blood. It was the same aftermath from the previous visions. This time however, Magnus noticed Alec’s ears had bled as well. He knew this meant the pain Alec felt had escalated to a new level.

The way Alec had borne the escalation of pain boggled Magnus’s mind.  

Magnus could never understand and could never accept this.

“Oh, darling,” Magnus said, feeling tears choking his throat. He knelt down to carefully pull Alec into his arm. His heart squeezed painfully at the way Alec’s head lolled brokenly towards his chest as he cradled the tall Shadowhunter. “What are you doing here alone?” he whispered. “You should have called me…”

Jace knelt in front of Magnus, taking in Alec’s conditions one by one. His mismatched eyes darkened at the sight of Alec’s bleeding ears - it was something new, something ominous. It was a sign of Alec was rapidly losing this battle. He reached out for Alec’s hand and hold it hard, afraid to see Alec gradually slipping away from him. “Magnus… These visions…” Jace said shakily as words stuck in his throat. Magnus’s raised his head and their eyes met. They shared a silent conversation as they both understood.

These visions were slowly killing Alec with each of visit.

“Not under my watch, Jace,” Magnus’s voice hardened and his hold on Alec tightened in fear. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”

“But how are we supposed to stop it?” Jace pled. “How are we supposed to help him?”

Magnus looked down at the man he loved the most. He raised his trembling hand to magically clean Alec’s face and then, he gently stroke the senseless man’s face and hair. He wished he could take away this ability to receive visions. More than anything, Magnus wished to heal all of Alec’s hurt and injuries both seen and unseen. If he could share even some of Alec’s pain, he would gladly trade his comfort to be able to do that. Hell, if Alec demanded his life, he - a warlock who was famed for his love for this world - would give it up so freely.

This was what hurt Magnus the most. It was the realisation that he _couldn't_ help Alec.

“I don't know, Jace, but I will find a way.” Magnus answered finally. “ _We’ll_ find a way.”

Jace nodded his head. There was a sense of conviction growing within him at Magnus’s words. He wasn’t alone in his dependency on Alec. He could see Magnus not only understood him but also shared his needs for Alec. They would do anything for Alec. And he and Magnus would find a way.

Jace stood up shakily. He turned around and opened his arms for Isabelle. Isabelle threw herself into Jace’s arms. “Come on, Izzy.”

Isabelle took a few shuddering breaths before forcing herself to calm down. “Yeah, yeah… I’m alright, now that Alec is here.”

Clary looked at the Lightwoods family dynamic in a deep longing. She wanted to be part of that kind of family love, now that her own mother had passed away. One day perhaps… Clary thought determinedly. “So, what about this place?” Clary said. “Why did Alec come here?”

“I don’t know,” Isabelle studied her surroundings. “There must be a reason why Alec came here- wait a minute.” Isabelle frowned before asking Clary.  “Does this place look familiar to you, Clary?”

Clary raised her eyebrows as she tilting her head, considering Isabelle’s question. “I’m not sure… Wait! This is the place!” Clary exclaimed. “This is the place where the rift is supposed to open.”

Isabelle’s eyes went wide in agreement. “Oh by the Angels… You’re right!”

“How does Alec even find this place?” Jace wondered. “And look!” Jace pointed to downwards. “There’s something on the ground.”

Magnus was still kneeling on the ground, holding Alec. He looked at where Jace was pointing and sure enough, he saw a thick line drawn. The line was nearly hidden with dirt and sand. Magnus frowned as he tentatively touched the dried black substance. “Demon’s ichor?” Magnus said. “But it looks and feels kind of different.”

Clary thought for a while. “Do you think someone was summoning something? I mean, the hole that Alec keeps on seeing must have meant demonic rift, right? And this?” Clary said, waving at the strange lines. “This could be a summoning circle or something.”

Everything about this bothered Magnus. First of all, why Alec was designated to receive this angelic visions when Alec wasn’t equipped to be receiving ones. Second, why Alec received the visions in inconsistent manner; what triggered the visions? Thirdly, these whole visions of rift and mysterious people around the hole - what were the angels trying to tell them? And using demon ichor as medium to draw the summoning circle was unheard of; was that why there was an increase in demonic attacks and summoning in this area? If that was the case, then there was one an unaccounted factor – one which might or might not be connected at all. The one that Magnus was pretty sure had something to do with this. The one that might answer if Magnus simply asked.

“Clary, Isabelle,” Magnus said finally. “I want you to look at the lines and try to draw the lines as accurately as possible. If it is indeed a summoning circle, the symbols from the circle can maybe be used to identify the type of demon that whoever intends to summon.”

“This is a huge drawing,” Isabelle said, warningly. “It could take some time, providing how intricate the design will be.”

Magnus nodded his head in understanding. “I know, Isabelle. Can I leave it to both of you here?”

Clary and Isabelle nodded their head determinedly, relieved to have something to do.

“Where are you going?” Jace asked.

“ _We_ , Jace.” Magnus corrected. “We are going to bring Alec to my loft, where it is warm and safe. Then, we are going to see someone.” Magnus said grimly as he stood up, carrying Alec in his arms – this had become too often of an occurrence. “Come on, Jace.”

“See who?” Jace asked as he followed the warlock out of the cave through Clary’s portal.

“Edward Stone.”

“Edward Stone, the warlock?” Jace asked as they stepped into Magnus’s loft.

“Yes. Alec and I went to see him a few weeks back.” Magnus replied. He carefully maneuvered his way towards his bedroom with the precious cargo still lied senselessly in his arms. He flicked his fingers to magically move the blanket so Alec would be more comfortable in his bed. Then he physically removed Alec’s shoes, before changing him into a more comfortable clothes using magic.

Jace watched Magnus fuss over Alec with a fond smile. Even though the feeling of annoyance at Magnus for breaking Alec’s heart still somehow lingered, seeing the powerful warlock reduced into an attentive caregiver to his _parabatai_ softened his heart. Magnus might have had his doubtful moments now and then, but even Jace couldn’t argue that Magnus was good to Alec. Jace had seen how Alec had changed for the better because of Magnus.

He used to wonder how someone who was so outgoing, flamboyant and vivacious like Magnus could fall so head-over-heel to someone who was so reserved, sombre and grumpy like Alec and vice-versa. If someone were to ask Jace a few years ago if Alec would go for someone like Magnus, he would laughed at the utter ridiculousness of it. But as the time went by, Jace saw the way Magnus draw Alec out of his shell and he saw the way Alec provide calmness in Magnus’s life, he knew that even though their personalities might clash starkly, they still complemented each other in such unexpected ways.

Magnus and Alec were a great example of how two totally opposite people were attracted to each other and eventually finding common grounds to make the relationship even stronger.

“You would make a great nurse,” Jace said brightly.

Magnus stood straight, turned to face Jace and raised his eyebrows. “Who said I had never been a nurse before?”

“I would like to see that,” Jace said in disbelief.

“Please, I have lived more than 400 years, I may have held every job imaginable.” Magnus said haughtily.

“Yeah right,” Jace said. “I can totally see you getting dirt under your nails in a construction work.”

“I have a spell for that,” Magnus huffed, ending the whole conversation.

Then he turned his attention back to Alec, sighing softly. The warlock sat on the bed with his hips brushed against Alec’s sharp hips. He eyed Alec quietly as he thought how unhealthy Alec looked under the dusky light and his own heart gave a quick squeeze of unhappiness. “You know, I’ve thought of something,” he said. “If the angels give Alec this prophetic visions, they must have predicted that Alec will have some... difficulty with this ability.”

Jace scoffed at the word difficulty. What he saw so far was not a difficulty; it was a torture.

Magnus apparently had read Jace’s expression and mentally agreed with him before continuing. “What am I trying to say is, the angels must have thought of a way for Alec to cope with this.”  

“I’m not sure I’m following you,” Jace frowned. “What do you mean ‘a way’?”

“I don’t know,” Magnus said. “Maybe a spell or an instrument that we can use. Can’t the Silent Brothers search for any information at all?”

“If you plan to tell the Silent Brothers, we need to prepare the possibly of the Clave knowing this thing. It might compromise Alec’s position as the Head of Institute.”

Magnus ran a distressed hand through his hair. “You know what, Jace. I’d rather see Alec lose his position as the Head of Institute than letting him die without exhausting every possible option. I've run out of my side of options. We may need to consider looking for information from Silent Brothers.”

“Calm down, Magnus,” Jace said, raising both of his hands in placating manner. “You and I are on the same side. I’m just saying that Alec may not agree.”

“I think he had forfeited his right to say anything when it comes to saving his life, especially after he had done something as reckless as going off alone without telling anyone.” Magnus retorted.

Jace looked at Magnus and he could clearly see the warlock was becoming unhinged. Apparently, seeing Alec like on the ground with blood on his face and ear had caused the warlock’s protectiveness to go overdrive. Not that he was blameless himself. “Anyway, what bothers me is our _parabatai_ rune.” Jace said.

“What about your _parabatai_ rune? Don’t you feel anything when Alec has one of the visions?” Magnus asked curiously. “Do you feel any pain?”

“That’s the weirdest thing. Usually, whenever Alec is hurt emotionally or physically, it always feels as if something shifts uncomfortably within myself. The stronger the pain, the sharper the shifting that I felt. That's how I know if something is wrong with Alec. Even when he is happy or sad, I would know. But this…” Jace said in utter frustration. “This whole thing doesn’t touch me at all. I don’t feel anything - not even a twinge. I had thought maybe it is because of the angel’s blood in me. Maybe it’s because I have the ability to directly communicate with the angels and it causes me to remain unaffected by the visions.”

“That’s another thing that perplexes me,” Magnus said. “If all the angels want was to convey the visions, why don’t they choose you or Clary? Why Alec? It’s not as if the angels hadn’t communicated with Clary before this.”

“Clary thought that maybe Alec has something that neither I nor Clary has.” Jace offered.

Magnus reached out to smooth disarray black hair from Alec’s face silently as he thought of Jace’s words. Clary’s words made sense to Magnus. The angels wouldn’t do anything without reasons. Maybe there was something about Alec that made him special. Something that was required by the angels to put this whole thing in motion.

But what did Alec have that no other Shadowhunters had?

“So, back to Edward Stone,” Jace started. “Why do you think he has anything to do with all these?”

Magnus sighed. “Alec told me that after the meeting with Stone, the demonic activities in the east side of Brooklyn had suddenly decreased. He told me that while that made Stone look suspicious, the lack of evidence caused him to hesitant on pursuing further investigation on Stone.”

“I was thinking about how the cave - where the rift is supposed to open - is on the east side of the Brooklyn and how Stone is conveniently living in the area as well. I was thinking about how unlikely his story is - that he has gone off-grid for a hundred years before suddenly deciding to join the society. The fact that he went to seclusion makes it hard for me to cross-check his background and so far, none of my contacts has ever heard about Edward Stone. So, we don't know if he is really who he said he is. And I was also thinking about how the lines of the summoning circle were drawn in ichor-like ink when the east side previously was swarmed with demonic attacks. These facts may all be just a string of coincidences but frankly, I don’t like him.” Magnus said bluntly.

“Of course you don’t like him, Magnus. Did you know that Edward gave Alec a card consists of his phone number with a message ‘call me’?” Jace scoffed.

Magnus body went tense at the unexpected announcement. _What?!_ Even though he knew he had no claim over Alec anymore, the possessiveness within him flared so abruptly that the lights in his bedroom flickered warningly. _How_ _dare that warlock make a move over what is mine! Does he know who I AM?_ Magnus thought so viciously.   

“Whoa!” Jace raised his hands up in a placating manner. Whenever Magnus lost control, Jace could help but thinking how intimidating the warlock was. “Relax, Magnus. The horrified expression on Alec’s face was enough to tell me Edward’s advance was not welcome at all.”

Magnus didn’t answer, but Jace could see the warlock was visibly trying to rein back his power. Gradually the electric feeling in the air disappeared and the lights went back to normal. But the taut lines along the warlock’s jaw and shoulders were still unmistakable as he kept his eyes on Alec.

“Magnus,” Jace said softly - tentatively. “You do know Alec is still horribly in love with you, right? Not even ten Edward Stones can undo that.”

Magnus swallowed hard. It took him a few minutes before he could speak up. “I have never doubted his love, Jace. Alec isn't the hardest person to read. He is the most honest person I have ever met and I can clearly see love written all over his face whenever he's around me. Alec couldn’t hide it. Why else do you think I kept fighting for him until the last minute of his wedding?”

Jace frowned, “Then, why? Why do you propose to Alec that both of you to remain as friends? ”

“I have done the most unforgivable act.” Magnus said softly. “I have shown him that I am willing to give up on him. And he fears me for that. Being friends is the only way Alec can bear having me near him.”

“Alec told me that he had lied to you and he deserved the breakup.” Jace told Magnus kindly. “He was not totally blameless.”

“Jace,” Magnus looked at him patiently. “This is not the issue of whose blame it was. If his fault was lying to me, I had also lied to him. Remember when I helped you steal his _stele_ so that we could get our hands on the Mortal Cup? There was also those times when he asked about my feelings after the whole fiasco of body-changing with Valentine and I shut him out initially even though he had been opened with me after Jocelyn’s death. But we didn't break back then. Not until after it was _I_ who was being lied to. By Alec. ”

“I had been burned before, Jace. By previous lovers as cruel as Camille. I reacted badly when being lied to by the people I loved. And there's no one in the world I love more than Alec. So, I went directly to the… jugular when I intended to hurt him. I'd rather be on the offensive side rather on the defensive. I turned away any request to reconsider my decision to side with the Seelies. I even didn't tell him about the ward that Queen Seelie requests me to put up that could potentially kill any Shadowhunter. But as the days went by, and I saw Alec standing there like a man facing his executioner whenever he was with me; stoic, without a trace of vindictiveness and so willing to accept the hurt, I slowly realised that Alec is not Camille - not by the longest shot - and that I'd made the biggest mistake in my long life. By then it was too late; Alec was already too far out of my reach.” Magnus closed his eyes in deep pain. His heartache was vivid enough for Jace to see.

“So, Jace,” Magnus continued, wiping grits of despair and exhaustion from his face. “This isn't about whose blame it was; it is the fact that I had willingly left him for whatever reasons and it had shown to Alec that while he was willing to fight for us; willing to forgive any transgression, I had _chosen_ to leave him. I had shown him that it was easy for me to turn my back on him, to choose other people over him. This is the most unforgivable act. And it is not even about Alec’s forgiveness. It is _I_ who cannot forgive myself because _I’ve caused Alec to fear me_.”

Jace went silent at those words. He was stunned at Magnus’s raw confession.

“He said he can't live without me. But at the same time, he also said he couldn't take the hurt again. I have made him realise that by loving me, I could also hurt him just as easily. My presence hurts him and I can see that pain every time we broach the topic of our breakup.  If I was ever kind to him, I should have left him be,” Magnus said bitterly. “But… but I can't. I can't live my days as I have before, not after knowing Alec. I am selfish and so in love with him that I have persuaded him to accept me even as a mere friend. And ever the honourable person that he is, Alec give in to me. He offers me a friendship that I do not deserve.”

“Don't say that!” Jace said so sharply that caused Magnus to look at him in surprise. Jace’s eyes were ablaze with indignant. “Don't say you don't deserve Alec as a friend or even as a lover. Yes, you angered me before when you broke Alec’s heart but, by the Angels, I have seen how you have made him happy as well. I know Alec, alright and trust me when I say he _bloomed_ when he was with you; you made him a better person. Oh, who the hell cares about the little hurdles or bumps along the way. We all make mistakes – you, Alec and me. The point is you make the efforts to reach out to Alec and you're willing to wait for him. That make it a whole lot different in my book.”

Magnus curved a small smile Jace’s passionate words. Relief unexpectedly flooded through his body. He had never realised just how much Alec’s family’s opinion about him mattered, but now, hearing Jace said that made something heavy in his heart dissipated.

“Just… just be patient with him, Magnus. Wait for him no matter how long it'll take. Alec can be so hard on himself sometimes - his upbringing made him like that, but he will eventually make the right decision.”

“Oh, Jace,” Magnus said, feeling lightened in many months at Jace’s words. Suddenly he saw a glimmer of hope in the darkness of despair he had been wallowing. “Of course I will wait for him. Haven't you heard? Forever means nothing to an immortal.”

And Jace laughed.


	6. Uncover the lost love softly, gently and with all the care in world.

 

* * *

_Keep me ensconced in your strong arms,_

_Keep me away from all of the coming harms;_

_Keep me alive with your hardest endeavour,_

_So I may stay here with you forever._

 

_And so, I called upon the heaven’s assistance,_

_I called upon the angels’ wisdom from the distance;_

_Pray that I will be allowed to survive the night,_

_And to see your face come morning light._

* * *

 

When Alec woke up, he felt so disconnected that he couldn't open his eyes. The ground beneath him felt soft and luxurious but before he could process the information, his body revolted against the sharp pain in his head. This was a headache from hell and judging by the double visions that he was subjected previously, it really shouldn't have come as any surprise.

Oh.. The throbbing in his head was driving him to distraction. Alec wished that he had never woken up at all.

“Alexander?” A soft, velvety voice caressed his ears. Alec knew that voice anywhere.

His eyes slitted open gingerly and slowly the familiar, handsome face came into view. “Magnus…” He whispered. The familiar relief that he always felt whenever he saw Magnus near him flooded throughout his body.

“Are you alright? You look like you're in pain.” Magnus asked in his lowered voice. The deep, lines of frown on Alec’s forehead were a sure indication.

“Headache..” Alec rasped. He felt Magnus gently pry open his clenched hands - he wasn't even aware he did that - and ran a ringed finger across his lips, urging Alec to release the lips from between his teeth.

“That bad, huh?” Magnus said sympathetically. The lighting in the room was being dimmed magically and then, he raised his hands with an intention to take away the pain. But the healing blue magic was simply being absorbed without taking away the pain. He tried again with a same result. “That's strange…”

“What's wrong?”

“I have detected the cause of your headache, but when I tried to heal it, the magic simply passed through like nothing happens. ” Magnus said in confusion. “By right, as of now you shouldn't have any headache.”

“Oh… well, I'm not even surprise. Nothing about this whole visions-seeing ability makes any sense,” Alec said in resigned tone. “Maybe it’s because it came from the angels and, who knows, maybe angel power and magic don’t really mix.”

“If that’s the case, then, I don't know how to help you,” Magnus said helplessly.

“Can’t you just knock me out?” Alec whispered half-serious half-jokingly. The pain in his head was killing him that he could barely keep his eyes open.

Magnus tightened his lips into a straight thin line at Alec’s request. It told him just how much in pain Alec was. In his long life, Magnus had always been able to help people around him - in sickness, in injury, in granting wishes, in the matter of memory or even in providing counselling. The fact that Magnus was not able to help Alec time and time again ever since this whole thing started, was driving him up the wall. Even with his vast knowledge and skills, Magnus couldn't help the one who mattered the most.

Damn it all, he couldn't even ease Alec’s simple headache.

So, he nodded his head at Alec’s request and summoned a sleeping potion. He gently helped Alec to raise his head and drink it. A soft whisper of _thank you_ made Magnus feel even more frustrated because he wished he had earned the gratitude with a deed much more than a measly sleeping potion.

As he waited for the sleeping potion to take effect - at least the potion worked -, Magnus traced the lines of pain on Alec’s face softly with his fingers and watched as they gradually faded. The sight eased something inside him. Alec’s skin felt warm and smooth under his fingers and the urge to retrace the paths that his fingers had travelled with his lips was overwhelming. But he didn't dare - not yet. So he contented himself with the sight of Alec’s  beautiful, sombre face - the face that captured his attention so unexpectedly when they had met for the very first time. Magnus missed this so fiercely. He missed having to see the sight of Alec sleeping so trustingly next to him during the nights, which was then followed by the vision of Alec when the first sliver of morning sun caressed his face. He missed having to feel Alec waking up and sleepily inching towards him every single morning, seeking his warmth and sense of security in such a sweet and irresistible manner. Magnus lived for those small moments because once the soldier in Alec woke up; once Alec stood tall with his hands on his back, the insecure man that Magnus had held all throughout the night would be hidden all day.   

Magnus sighed softly as his heart ached at those memories. He didn’t know one could miss someone so deeply even when that person was right in front of him. When he was sure Alec had fallen asleep, he leaned down to drop a gentle, lingering kiss on the Shadowhunter’s forehead and twice more on each eyelid. At the feel of Alec’s thick lashes brushed so delicately against his own lips, Magnus could feel love filled inside his heart too much and too quickly that he thought that he could never take another normal breath until Alec returned his love just as he did before.

“If I can wait 400 years to meet you, Alexander, I think I can wait a little while longer for you to come back to me,” Magnus whispered. “Take as much time as you want, darling… Just please… please don't leave me here without you.”

Alec sighed in his sleep and his body unconsciously curled towards Magnus as if he was responding to Magnus words. With Alec’s hand within his own hand, - fingers carded through each others - Magnus leaned back against his sofa, waiting patiently for Alec to wake up again.

The hours passed. The night was quiet and calming, blanketing the two men with its coolness and serenity. Magnus had taken the opportunity to sleep for a few hours before he was jerked out from his light slumber as he felt Alec’s movements. His hand felt stiff from holding Alec’s hand for hours and his eyes felt gritty from the uncomfortable sleeping position but Magnus felt like this was the best sleep he had gotten since the day he left Alec in the Institute five months ago.

“Hey, angel…” Magnus greeted softly once a again, leaning closer to Alec. He smiled when he saw the pair of hazel eyes blink slowly without any traces of pain. Still, he needed to ask,  “How's your head?”

“Mmmm…” Alec returned Magnus’s smile sleepily. “Good, it feels good.”

Magnus laughed softly as he reached out to slowly push the black strands off the archer’s face fondly. Alec was simply too cute for his own good when he let down all of his shields and allowed the sensitive side of him emerge. Magnus helped Alec drink a few sips of water and let him lie back down.

“What time is it?” Alec asked, yawning. “And where am I?”

“Two hours before dawn and you are in my loft,” Magnus answered. “You've been asleep for almost ten hours. What was the last thing you remembered, Alexander?”

Alec thought for a while before said, “Having visions from hell.” Magnus didn't bother correcting Alec that technically speaking, those visions were from heaven.

“Visions?” Magnus frowned. “As in more than once?”

“The vision came at me when I was looking at a strange drawing on the ground. After the vision faded, I pulled out my phone to call someone and that was when the second vision hit me.” _By Angels the pain was so… unbearable_. Alec thought in despair. Just when he thought it couldn't get any worse, the angels seemed to accept his unspoken challenge and gave him another vision with pain more crippling than the previous one.

If the patterns kept up, Alec strongly suspected he wouldn't last much longer.

“The vision hit you back to back?” The incredulity in Magnus’s voice was palpable. “How much time did you have between the two visions?”

“Within a minute, I think,” Alec said as he tried to be blasé about the pain but judging by the horrified look on Magnus’s face, Alec didn't think he succeeded.

Magnus stood up abruptly and started to pace. Two visions in a time span of a mere minute! This development worried Magnus acutely. Something told him the angels were pushing Alec to see more and more without considering the impact of those visions on the recipient’s health. The last time Alec had the vision, he had woken up whole and refreshed. Now, he had a crippling headache to deal with.

To matter worse, he was also shown just how useless his magic was against the side effect of angelic visions. It means Magnus couldn't help Alec even if he wanted to.

That… terrified him.

“What were you thinking, Alexander?” Magnus said so sharply as worry seeped through his words. “Why did you go off on your own and didn't tell anyone where you were going? What possessed you to go into that forsaken cave? Did you know how careless you are? You could have a vision while you were fighting demons with no one would be there to back you up!”

Alec pushed himself up to lean heavily against the headboard. If he was going to be lectured like a six-year old kid, he would rather take it sitting up than lying now. “Look, I'm- I'm sorry, alright.” Contrition was stark on his face as he looked up at Magnus. He truly was sorry for making everyone worried so unnecessarily over his thoughtless actions. “It was wrong for me to go out without telling anyone - I know that - but I was feeling stressed out with Isabelle and Jace’s hovering that I thought maybe a few hours outside, alone might help.”

Magnus just looked stonily at Alec without saying anything.

“I didn't even plan the outing,” Alec continued hastily. “In fact, I barely notice where I was heading. The next thing I knew, I was walking towards the east Brooklyn to, you know,” he shrugged helplessly. “... to check whether there's anymore demonic activities occuring there.”

“You had walked all across the Brooklyn and you said you didn't plan the outing?” Magnus said in disbelief.

Again, Alec looked down guiltily because what else he could say? It was the truth. “I guess the walk was more soothing than I had thought. And anyway, it was there where I met Edward Stone.”

“The warlock?” Magnus’s body tensed at the mention of the tall warlock. He recalled Jace’s words, telling him how Stone gave Alec his card and asked Alec to call him.

Alec studied the frosty look on Magnus’s face and decided not tell him about Edward’s blunt proposal or even the first call card he gave when they had met for the first time. Magnus was angry enough at him for wandering around all by himself that Alec didn't want to add more fuel to the fire. “Yes, the warlock. We exchanged pleasantries, I asked him whether he was involved with the sudden decrease in the demonic attacks, which he totally denied, and then, I told him that I should be going because it was late. So, he offered to portal me back to the Institute, which I agreed. And when I went through the portal, instead of the Institute, I arrived at that place. ”

Brief and straight-to-the-point.  But the slight flush on Alec’s face betrayed him and Magnus knew that Edward- _goddamn_ -Stone had tried to make another pass at Alec. That knowledge caused something unpleasant to uncoil within him. Jace said Alec didn't welcome the advance at all but how could Magnus be sure when Alec didn't even welcome _him_? How could Magnus be reassured of anything about Alec when his own hold on the archer was flimsy?

Magnus knew if he stayed here for another minute, Alec would discover how unlike a friend his reaction would be. Magnus and possessiveness mixed like powder keg and fire - the explosiveness was not pretty to watch. He took a few deep, calming breaths.

“I'm going to get you something to eat,” Magnus said instead and he walked out of the room.

Alec watched Magnus leave in dismay. He had incorrectly thought Magnus left because he was angry at Alec’s careless actions. For a moment, he was viciously reminded of the time when Magnus had turned around and left him for good, before Alec quickly shook off the memory and the phantom hurt it brought. _Magnus is my friend,_ Alec reminded himself repetitively; _it is not like before._ So, Alec pushed away the blanket that was covering him, attempted to stand steadily and followed Magnus out after finding out that he could walk just fine.

When he exited Magnus’s room, he halted when he saw Jace pass out on the sofa. “Jace?” He frowned. “Magnus, why is Jace here?” He called.

“Wait, what are you doing out of the bed?” Magnus asked from the kitchen. “Go back to bed, I'll be there in a moment.’

Alec didn't answer, instead, he walked away from the sleeping Jace and went into the kitchen. The scene in front of him caused his heart to swell with fondness when he saw Magnus had summoned his favorite Japanese food and was setting up a tray for him. When the warlock turned around to bring the tray back to the bedroom, he huffed in exasperation to see Alec lean quite heavily against the door frame.

“I told you to go back to bed.”

“I'm alright, Magnus,” Alec insisted. “You don’t have to go through all the troubles.” He, then, sat slowly on one of the chairs; his arms rested on the table. The lingering tiredness made his movements languid. “Why is Jace here?” Alec repeated his previous question.

Magnus put down the tray. “After we brought you home- sorry, my loft-,” Magnus silently cursed at the slip but Alec appeared to have missed it. “-Jace and I went to see Edward Stone. Before you say anything, we have discussed it and thought it was the best course of option. His appearance does seem awfully coincide with the lines of event that have been happening lately.”

“No, you're right. There's something about the warlock that doesn't seem right to me,” Alec said. “But I’m quite reluctant to prosecute him based on circumstantial evidences. So, unless we see or have a witness see Edward summoning demons that are responsible for the attacks, he will have to remain as suspect.”

Magnus didn't like that at all but he could respect Alec’s fairness. The New York Institute was moving towards a difference approach in dealing with rogue Downworlders and that meant following the due process.

“I went to see Edward Stone under the capacity of a High Warlock, so, you don't have to worry about the Clave being involved,” Magnus reassured the Head of New York Institute.

Alec smiled softly at Magnus’s consideration. “So, what did you find out?”

“Nothing,” Magnus replied as he pushed the plate towards Alec and raised his eyebrows, urging the Shadowhunter to eat. Frankly, Magnus didn't like how Alec looked like he was wasting away. It was as if this ability to see prophetic visions took away his weight and his health in a such rapid manner. Alec had been sleeping for nearly ten hours and yet his pallor was pale white with sunken eyes, making his already big eyes appeared haunted. “We went to Edward Stone’s house, but he wasn't there.”

“Oh,” Alec said, strangely sounded disappointed.

“It was already quite late at night when we gave up trying to find Stone, so, I told Jace to stay here. He insisted to sleep on the sofa, in case something else happened, and the guest room is too far for his liking.” Magnus stopped to look at the way Alec picking at his food. “You have got to eat more than that.”

Alec grimaced but shove the food inside his mouth anyway. After a few bites, Alec knew he couldn't take one more without throwing up, so, he pushed away his plate apologetically. Magnus sighed. “Fine, but you need to eat more for the next meal. You need food to replenish the energy you've lost when you're having the visions.”

Alec looked kind of green on the edges at the threat of bigger meal portion but he nodded his head in agreement. He didn't want to argue with Magnus and gave the older man more worry than what he had currently.

“Speaking of which, what did you see in your visions?” Magnus asked, using magic to clear away the table and replace the food with two mugs of hot chocolate, which was again Alec’s favorite.

To say Alec was touched was an understatement.

“I saw a creature came out from the hole. I don't think it is a demon. Or maybe it is and I've never seen it before.” Alec’s eyes resumed their usual faraway look whenever he tried to recall the vision. Magnus had never liked that look before because he couldn’t help but think the angels were taking Alec away from him bit by bit. The thought of not being able to keep Alec with him terrified the warlock immensely. “By the Angels, Magnus, the creature is huge and grotesque. It’s bigger than those Edomian demons that we’ve encountered before. It’s bigger than an average house. It has two sets of wings and hands and feets.” Alec’s hands waved around to convey the creature.

“I-,” Magnus halted. “I’ve never heard a demon that looks like the one you described or the one with that kind of a size.”

“It has also a staff that it holds on one of its hands.” Alec suddenly remembered. “I’ll draw the creature later. Maybe you can use the drawing to cross-check with your books.”

“Yes, you should do that. _But later,_ ” Magnus emphasised when he saw Alec starting to stand up. “Right now, I want you to sit down and finish the drink. You've lost some of your weight and I don't like how pallid your face looks.”

“But…” Alec began to protest.

“Alexander,” Magnus said quietly. Alec halted his protest at Magnus’s grim tone. “You scared me yesterday. When Clary called me hysterically about you having visions somewhere alone, I was… I was terrified. You have no idea how angry and scared I was yesterday. And when I couldn’t portal straight to you…” Magnus bit his lips hard before quietly said, “I was so ready to tear the world apart looking for you. ”

“Magnus, I am so sorry for my action yesterday…” Alec said in deep guilt as he sat back down.

“No, it’s not just that,” Magnus shook his head. “I understand that you can’t always be accompanied everywhere, that someday, you are going to have visions alone; it is inevitable. But the thing that terrifies me the most is that for each time you received visions, there’s a part of me that hates myself for not being able to do anything to help you - to, to share your pain. I couldn’t block the visions, I couldn’t portal to you and now, apparently, I couldn’t even alleviate your headache. I can help people around me but I can’t help you.”

“Magnus,” Alec was so, so stunned. Never in his wildest imagination that Magnus would consider himself as a failure for unable to help him. “You- you are not my keeper.”

“BUT I AM!” Magnus thundered as he suddenly stood up. Alec’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped open as he watched Magnus ablaze with frustration. “Don’t you see, Alexander? I am you keeper. I’ve always been you keeper! I was always able to help you from closing a goddamn portal to hell, to being an advocate for your sister to even as insignificant as to heal your scratches. I would burn out my magic at a simple request from you. It doesn’t matter whether we were lovers or friends or mere acquaintances, my assistance has always been yours for the taking. That has never and will never change. And if there’s one thing I have always been able to do it right by you, is that to keep you from harm and to help you through anything.”

Alec was rendered speechless at Magnus’s declaration. His heart thundered at those words - remembering Magnus’s requests a month ago. _It means, when I call you, I want you to pick up. It means, when you are in any trouble or - or when you need my assistance for anything; even as mundane as opening a portal, I want you to call me first._ Alec had assumed back then that Magnus wanted him to prioritise Magnus over other warlocks. Never had he imagined that Magnus had considered him - a Shadowhunter with a mile-long personal issues - as Magnus’s _own_ to protect and to care for. He never knew Magnus considered him as someone he needed to protect, no matter who he was - even when he couldn’t be what Magnus wanted him to be. Even when they were nothing more than just a friend, Magnus still considered Alec as his own.

Alec was Magnus’s from the first day they met and, by the heavens above, he had never even realised it.

“If I can’t offer you any assistance using my magic, Alexander, then what good am I to you?” Magnus said softly. He sounded tired and resigned.

Alec didn’t like that tone. Vivacious Magnus should never sound like that.

Without realising, Alec reached both of his hands across the table to grab Magnus’s hands. He tightened his hands around Magnus’s as if afraid the warlock would portal out and leave him behind. Something warm and alive bloomed in his heart at the realisation how deep Magnus’s care for him.

With his heart in his throat and the fullness of his chest, Alec whispered, “I always only wanted you as you were, Magnus, without the High Warlock title, without your wealth and even without your magic. Even if you were a Mundane and you walked passed by me, I would have still wanted you from that first glance. What drew you to me was who you were and not what you could do for me.”

Magnus’s heart ached in deep pain at use of the past tense in Alec’s words. He wanted those words to be said in present tense. He wanted Alec as he was before; before Magnus had ruined them with his cruel barbs and vicious actions. If by being as who he was what drew Alec to him in the first place, by being who he was also the reason Alec was hurting like this. He had lost Alec and now, he had to teach himself to be content by Alec’s kind words.  

“Magnus,” Alec said softly, unaware the reason of Magnus’s pain but still trying to console the older man. “We are friends, right?” And that words tasted bitter on Alec’s tongue, but he still continued, “Aren’t friends supposed to support each other? It is not a one-way relationship. I hope you realise that my assistance is always yours for the taking too.”

Magnus shoved his heartache deep inside him, before raising his glassy eyes to meet Alec’s liquid greenish eyes. “Does that mean you are my keeper as well?” He tried to tease through his sorrow.

“By all the goods in this world, you know that I am,” Alec said hoarsely, desperately held himself back from kissing the warlock who meant more than his life.

* * * * *

“Wow,” Jace whistled when Isabelle and Clary unrolled the parchment that illustrate the summoning circle. They were still at Magnus’s loft when Isabelle and Clary had returned from their mission late that morning. Apparently, the two women had been working late into the night, grabbing a few hours of sleep before coming here to show their fruit of labour. Magnus’s living room were full of scattered papers and books and on the softboard, Alec’s third drawing of his vision was pinned next to the previous two drawings.

“Yeah, you can say that again,” Isabelle said with one hand on her curvy waist. “It took Clary and I almost a whole day to draw this and making sure we haven't missed anything. So, what do you think, Magnus?”

Magnus leaned down closer to the parchment to study the symbols. The dark eyebrows furrowed in concentration as his dark brown eyes traced the lines in the circle. “I don't recognise some of these symbols and I don't think they're in my books at all. Those symbols are either incorrectly drawn or they are older than all the languages I knew.”

“We were careful, Magnus,” Clary insisted. “They are not incorrectly drawn.”

Magnus raised his eyes to look at affronted-looking Clary and Isabelle, hiding his amusement. “I'm not disparaging your drawing skill, Biscuit, nor your power of observation, Isabelle. What I'm trying to say is that, whoever drew this circle may have wrongly drawn the symbols or they are way, way older than I am.”

“Well, if we cross checked the summoning circle with the creature that will be summoned, it should narrow down the search, right? I mean, Alec’s drawing is kind of detailed, so, it doesn't matter if some of the symbols are inaccurate.” Jace gestured at the drawing that Alec drew this morning. By the heaven, the creature was so...grotesque. Jace shuddered to think about seeing it in real life.

“We’ll have to make do what we have,” Magnus sighed as he eyed with concerned to Alec, who was on a phone call with the Institute for quite some time now. “Hopefully, together, the research can be done quickly.” He still thought that their best bet was with the Silent Brothers but he also agreed with Jace that until they had really exhausted any other alternative, they would keep the Silent Brothers out of the loop.

“There is something else that concerns me,” Isabelle said. “There is something about the ichor-like ink that is used to draw the circle.”

“What about it?” Magnus asked.

“I thought that maybe if the whole purpose of Alec’s visions is about that place and the summoning circle, maybe by erasing the summoning circle, we can - I don't know,” she shrugged her slim shoulders. “- stop the whole vision thing that Alec has. Without the circle, there will be no creature and therefore, there will be nothing for the angels to tell us, am I right? And the visions will stop coming, period. But no matter how hard I try to erase the line, it seems as if the ink is anchored to the ground. I even try digging the area surrounding the drawing but the ink freakily pulled itself firmly back. I mean, that has got to be magic, right?” Isabelle asked.

Magnus frowned deeper. For each information that they had uncovered, Magnus was feeling even more and more out of his depth. The unrecognisable symbols, the unidentified creature, the unheard medium of ink with strange reaction and the magic that Magnus had never even heard of. He had lived for hundreds of years; had been dabbling in legal and illegal magic, and yet never had he felt this novice -  not since he was young when he had first uncovered what he was capable of. “This is out of my knowledge, but I will ask the warlock community. Somebody must have known something,” he said finally.

Jace opened his mouth to say something when suddenly, Alec walked towards the group with a serious look, having finally concluded his long phone call. Jace inwardly groaned because he recognised that face too well.  “Please don't tell me we have a mission,” Jace said incredulously.

“Sorry, Jace. The Institute is stretching thin as all the Shadowhunters are being despatched to different areas of demonic attacks and sightings. Until we totally destroy the escaping Edomian wraith demons, these attacks are going to keep on happening.” Alec said grimly. “As of now, we have an area that is not being covered by anyone and the reports that came in are very concerning. So, I told the command centre that we'll be taking that area.”

Jace looked at Alec unhappily. He wanted to be here and solved this problem - keenly aware that they were racing against time; now that it was clear that for each vision occurred, Alec was getting worse, but he also knew that they had been away from the Institute for nearly two days. They had their own responsibilities as Shadowhunters. Even so, Jace still wanted Alec to opt out from this fight as the man clearly was still a shade too pale for Jace’s liking. “How many demons are we talking about?” Jace asked.

Alec grimaced before answering, “Too many for me to not join the fight. You’re going to need all the help that you can get.” Alec had read his _parabatai’s_ worried, calculated face; he knew Jace was scared of him having to go into a battle too soon. He wanted to be exasperated by Jace’s thoughts but yesterday’s harrowing incident caused Alec to swallow all of his _I’m fine_ speech.

“Besides, if the previous pattern holds true, I will most probably be vision-free for at least three days.” Alec said quietly.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Alec?” Isabelle said worriedly.

Alec sighed. “I don’t think I have a choice. If the number of demons is just two or three, I will follow your advice and stay behind. But the Institute said the area is swarming with demons, so, I don’t want to take any chance. I am the Head of Institute and there is no way I’m staying behind with that big of an attack. It’s my responsibility, Izzy.”

Magnus was thinking about his options as he listened to the whole conversation. The truth was, Magnus didn’t want to be left behind as well. By being there, he could have at least keep an eye out for Alec. He glanced at the scattering books and papers in the living room and thought that the research could wait.

“If you don’t mind, I would like to assist you,” Magnus said. He had known from previous experiences that there was no use pleading any Shadowhunter to stay away from any demonic fights. If he had any hope of seeing any of them came back unscathed, he would need to be there to ensure it himself.

“Yes, of course, if you want to,” Alec said without any hesitation. The intimate conversation that they had a few hours earlier caused Alec to realise that refusing Magnus’s offer of assistance would only hurt the warlock - now that Alec knew how seriously Magnus considered his self-appointed post as his keeper. And Alec had done enough for the last two days to hurt either his _parabatai,_ sibling or Magnus. If Jace was surprise by Alec’s easy acquiescence, he didn’t show it. In fact, Jace looked kind of relief.

So, all five of them went off to complete their mission.

Half an hour later, Alec found himself perching on the edge of stairs, silently providing cover for his siblings and friends with his bow and arrows whilst expertly changed his weapon to seraph blade if there were demons creeping to close to his position. The Institute had directed them to an abandoned warehouse where there was indeed a swarm of demons that had been let loose from where ever they had been hiding.

From here, he could see Jace and Clary fought side by side in awkward motion, clearly they were still trying to figure out each other’s movements. They focused on the ground, where demons were pouncing on them left and right. Not too far from the pair, Isabelle used her whip to grab hold of flying demons’ feet/wings to yank them towards other demons. The fierce thrust caused other demons to lose whatever fighting strategy that they had. Together with Isabelle, Magnus was dealing with other airborne demons too, releasing his red sparks of magic to them.

The fight lasted for more than a couple of hours. Alec gradually realised that Jace and Clary were quickly becoming too overwhelmed by the sheer number of adversaries that he knew his own position was no longer effective. So, Alec released his last arrow that he had been saving for some time now towards one of the flying demons - shooting it straight to its neck - and then, he ran down to join them on the battleground with a seraph blade shone with power.

Alec was not a proficient blade wielder but being a _parabatai_ to Jace had quickly taught Alec to be at least capable. Jace was hotheaded and reckless that often, Alec found a simple bow and arrows were not enough to pull him out of trouble. Effortlessly, Alec blended himself beside Jace, replacing Clary, and soon enough, the _parabatai_ partners synced in the oldest dance with the sounds of battle as their music. When they fought together, it was as if their heart beat as one that they became one.

Seeing Alec had joined Jace, Clary put away her own seraph blade to pull out her _stele_ to draw her sun rune. Flashes of sunlight caused screeching from nearby demons before they were burned to ashes.

The horde of demons seemed endless with a mixture of Ravener, Shax and other types of demons came out to overpower them. It didn’t take long before all of them were sporting scratches, bruises and lacerations here and there. Isabelle’s arm was being clawed by a flying demon and was at the risk of being decapitated before Magnus incinerated it with his magic. Magnus’s forehead was bleeding from being knocked against the concrete wall when a demon blindsided him from behind. Alec saw Magnus trying to get his bearing and rushed towards the warlock to slash through the demon that clearly planned to plunge its claws into the warlock’s chest.

Magnus flashed a smile of gratitude before turning himself back into the battle. Then Alec resumed his place at beside Jace but still keeping his eyes close on the warlock. Jace’s head and lips bled profusely, but the maniacal grin that the blond Shadowhunter sported told Alec just how much he enjoyed this fight. Alec shook his head in fond exasperation. He himself was bruised and sore from yesterday’s excursion and today’s ridiculously long fight. But he kept his pace and continued killing demons.

Eventually, the demons were dwindling. Alec was about to let out a relieved sigh when suddenly, he felt the familiar feeling of vision hitting him.

Alec was too shock. This wasn’t supposed to happen! He was supposed to have some respite from this. Not when yesterday he was hit by two visions! “No, no…” Alec muttered. “This is not happening. Not here, not now, please…”

However, this time, his prayer went unheard.

As the pain engulfed him instantly, Alec stumbled on his feet and his seraph blade fell down with a clang. His sight was taken away, preparing it to receive visions sent by the Angels. Without any warning, his brain was being prodded and twisted and burned in indescribable agony. He lost the ground beneath his feet and he lost any sense of the fighting all around him. All that he could see and hear was the stark, forceful image for the same godforsaken cave.

The vision felt urgent and forceful, even more so than usual. It was as if the angels were trying to bring Alec up to the speed. It was as if the time was running out faster than it was supposed to. So, in this vision, Alec saw the image of the creature burst out of the cave and Alec was somehow trying to hold the creature back into the hole with the strange energy that came out of his hands. This vision was a continuation of the yesterday’s one - the one that he hadn’t been able to complete.

He saw his hands were raised up and the red and gold light bursted out from his hands. In his vision he saw himself straining against the immensely powerful energy that he had generated? or was it channeled? Alec wasn’t sure because the agony from the vision felt too rushed and too much; it caused the images to shift too quickly and too urgently. Alec couldn’t really see the vision clearly this time as the sense of urgency caused his vision to falter like a television losing its signals due to power overload. _Damn it!_ Alec thought angrily as he reached up to wipe off the flowing blood from his nose. _I can’t see what you want me to see if the images don't ease up!_

Magnus’s eyes widened when he saw Alec drop to his knees, with his hands were in familiar pose - clutching his head in utter pain. His heart dropped at the realisation that Alec was having a vision right now and there were hungry demons pouncing the dark-haired Shadowhunter. He tried to get closer to Alec, to help him, but the demons that he had been fighting were blocking his way in every turn. “Jace!” Magnus shouted, shooting out magic energy to incinerate one of the demons. “JACE!”

Jace turned around at Magnus’s calling and saw Magnus gesture frantically at Alec. “It’s Alexander! Protect Alexander!” Magnus shouted as he tried once again to get to Alec. Goddamn, persistent demons!

Jace’s eyes widened in realisation that his _parabatai_ was not beside him anymore, silently cursing the fact that he couldn’t feel Alec’s pain when it came to having visions. He was just in time blocking a pair of clawed hands from tearing Alec apart. “Damn it, Alec!” Jace breathed - there was no time to panic as he moved instinctively to both protecting Alec and fighting off the demons. It was not an easy task, not when he had to parry the attacks from almost all directions.

Isabelle saw Jace’s predicament and she swung her whip vigorously to help freeing Magnus’s path towards Alec. “Go! Go!” Isabelle cried. “Magnus, go and help Jace!”

Magnus jerked his head in thanks as he blew up the last pesky demon near him. He ran towards Jace. Like a game of tag, Jace relinquished his duty of protecting Alec to Magnus without any hesitation before thrusting himself back into the fight with renewed resolve and with one objective: to finish this whole thing off faster! Together, Jace and Magnus fought in the unprecedented synchronisation as they shared the same aim to protect Alec and the same determination to hasten the end of this fight.

Clary regrouped with Isabelle, shooting out her sun rune to the lasts of the demons and fifteen minutes later, the group of Shadowhunters with their warlock companion were surrounded by the floating ashes of demons’ remains. Each one of them bore injuries and bruises and was exhausted as hell but at least, they were alive.

Alec was unaware of all these. He was trying his utmost to sift through the crippling pain and the faltering visions. _Something doesn’t feel right_ , Alec thought faintly… whether it was because the energy from the vision was overloading uncontrollably or because his energy reserves was running dangerously low from prolonged battle or even because of visions hitting him so constantly and frequently without gaps of respite. Alec felt this time, the vision was _sucking_ out his life force too much too quickly. So much so, that this time no matter how hard he tried to focus, the visions faded in and out of his mind.

 _What the hell’s happening..?_ Alec thought frantically.

“Jace…” Alec rasped, blindly reaching for his _parabatai._

“Alec!” Jace rushed to kneel in front of Alec.

“Something is not right…” Alec grabbed Jace arm tightly and his other hand clutched his head so hard that it left slight indentation on his skin. He moaned through the pain.

“What do you mean?” Jace asked, exchanging panic look with Magnus, who had also kneeled beside Jace facing Alec.

“It’d never felt this demanding before…” Alec wheezed. “The visions have never taken this much from me. And now it’s sucking me dry…”

“Alec, what do you mean?! ” Jace said frustratedly.

Alec raised his eyes to meet Jace. Jace was taken aback how glassy Alec’s eyes look and how pale his face had become. This was the first time Alec showed any awareness of his surrounding while he was having a vision. “I- I feel… I feel like I'm _dying_ …” with that, Alec crumpled and Magnus quickly caught him. He turned Alec around to cradle him close to his heart.

“Alec!” Isabelle and Clary cried simultaneously.

“Magnus…” Alec gasped.

“I’m here, darling. I’m here.” Magnus said urgently, shoving down his panic.

Magnus didn't like how shallow Alec’s breathings were, so, he raised his blue shimmered hands to check the man in his arms. His eyes widened when he sensed how Alec’s heartbeat slowed down dramatically and his energy level was dropping precipitously, as if someone or something was indeed sucking him dry. “Oh no… Oh, please no,” Magnus whispered under his breath.

“There's something different about this vision,” Magnus said to the rest of the Shadowhunters agitatedly. “Alec had never talked to us during his visions, but now he was aware and somehow, this new-found ability is using more of Alec’s energy than he could have spared!”

“What do you mean, Magnus?” Jace asked in trepidation. “What will happen to Alec?”

Magnus looked at Jace, fear conquered every inch of the warlock’s face. “This vision that Alec is having right at this moment, is killing him so rapidly, and if we can't find a way to stop this vision, within a few minutes -” Magnus halted; lump in his throat. “-I don't think he can survive this.”

The responses from the Shadowhunter were immediate and deafening as panics ensued.

“How are we supposed to stop the thing cannot be controlled in the first place?!!”

“What do you mean Alec will die in a few minutes. What can we do in a few freaking minutes?!”

“Can't we just knock Alec unconscious? The vision only works when Alec conscious, right?”

Magnus bit his lips as he watched Alec’s face scrunch in deep pain. It pained him to hear moans of pain escaped from Alec’s bruised and chapped lips and to see his chest stuttered with shallow uneven breaths. And most of all, his heart was torn to pieces at the way the pair of greenish eyes looking back him - the lasts of his consciousness - apologising at Magnus for whatever imaginary fault his psyche told him to be sorry for.

He wasn’t prepared for this. He thought he would have more time to figure this out!

His surroundings was full of people arguing about what to do with Alec but Magnus was only aware of the man in his arm; so ill-equipped to handle the _fires from heaven_ that they were literally burning his life out. Magnus’s heart squeezed too tightly, suffocating him, in face of such loss.

“Magnus!” Isabelle called him. Magnus raised his head up slowly to look at the raven-haired Shadowhunter. “There must be something we can do!”

“My magic can't do anything to help him,” Magnus said in devastated tone. Grief was a crippling emotion. Magnus was rendered so motionless at the realisation that he was useless. “Alexander is slipping through my fingers and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.”

Suddenly, Clary gasped as she received her own vision. As if she was receiving wireless connection from heaven, her eyes followed whatever invisible drawing conveyed in front of her eyes, nodding her head at the information she was given. Then, Clary quickly dug into her pocket jeans for her _stele._

__

 

“Jace!” Clary called out to her boyfriend. Jace was frozen at the sight of his _parabatai_ suffering and that he _couldn't_ feel anything at all. How could this be? Wasn't Alec supposed to share his soul? Wasn't a part of him supposed to feel what his other soul felt? And now Alec was _dying_? The solid ground beneath his feet gave away and Jace felt so damned unhinged.

“JACE!” Clary screamed. Jace looked at the redhead in an incomprehensible stare. “You can save him, Jace, do you hear me? You can save him!”

“I-I can?” Jace stammered in blooming hope. Magnus’s head snapped at Clary, sharing Jace’s glimpse of salvation.

“Yes! I received a new runic vision!” Clary said as she grabbed hold of his right hand, turning it over to show his palm. “I’m going to draw _amor et virtutis vinctum_ to your palm and the same rune on Alec’s shoulder.”

“ _Amor_ what?!” Jace asked bewilderedly but still letting Clary pulled his hand towards her. The hissing sound and the pain of a rune being permanently marked on his skin brought Jace sharp to reality and he watched the swirls of the rune gradually humming with dormant power under his skin.

With Magnus’s help, Alec was turned on his right. Clary asked Magnus to find an empty space on Alec’s left shoulder and quickly Magnus tore open Alec’s black shirt to reveal an empty spot just above the _Flexibility_ rune. Clary looked at Alec’s death-like face, knowing that they were cutting it too close; that she didn't know whether this rune could work at all. Swallowing down her panic, Clary guided her _stele_ to draw the same rune that she had drawn on Jace to Alec’s shoulder.

“Now, Magnus, I want you to hold Alec steady. Jace, are you ready? I need you to put your hand on Alec’s _Virtutis_ rune.” Clary ordered. Jace hastily covered Alec’s still red and raw rune with his own, matching the rune line by line, curve by curve.

“What now?” Isabelle asked as she bit her nails in utter suspense.

“Now, I want you, Jace, to activate your _strength_ and _stamina_ runes simultaneously.”

Jace nodded. As he prepared to do so, he said to Magnus. “Are you ready, Magnus?”

“Ready.” Magnus held Alec firmly.

He closed his eyes to purposely call upon his angel blood. When he opened his eyes, the mismatched eyes burned gold and both _strength_ and _stamina_ runes that were permanently marked on his body, glowed in similar gold without the assistance of a _stele._

Alec’s reaction was immediate. Whereas before he could only lie down, holding down the ongoing vision with gasps of pain as he felt his life-force leave him little by little; now, he felt a gushing surge of energy flowed from Jace to him. It caused Alec to jerk violently, his eyes snapped wide open and his body was line with strain - unused to receive that much of power.

Something happened to Alec and Jace - their body glowed in golden light. Magnus could feel the energy were moving from Jace towards Alec. He could also see Alec’s wide, unseeing hazel eyes began to tinge with blue, much to his surprise. If anyone were to ask him to describe Alec, he would say that Alec was transforming into something else. But, then, Magnus could just be fanciful.

The pain in his head didn't go away, still crippling in a way that caused a rush of fresh blood to come out once again from his nose, but, _by the Angel_ , Alec felt the rush of energy flowed into him like a much needed air in a starving lungs. His body arched with renewed strength, his breaths quickened in surprised gasps and suddenly Alec could see the vision with such clarity that it made the previous visions seemed blurry. If it wasn't for Magnus’s hold on him, Alec would probably collapsed at the feeling of sheer angelic power ran through him.

And he could see everything now. He could see the creature, the rift; he could clearly see the man on the other side of the hole, whom in previous visions he had only managed to see a silhouetted figure. He didn’t recognise the man but at least he knew what he looked like. On his side, he could see a man, no longer clouded from him. It was Jace, Alec realised in a sudden jolt of recognition. Jace was on his left side, holding his shoulder.

Alec further saw that he had his hands raised heaven wards, shooting out red gold energy that blanketed the entire hole. He was holding that enormous creature with the red gold power. And the energy didn't solely come from him, Alec knew Jace was giving his own angelic strength and power to him. With the power given to him by Jace, Alec was able to hold back the creature.

As soon as that knowledge imparted to Alec, the visions vanished so abruptly that it caused Alec to immediately slump from his strained position, moaning through the residual pain in his head. Jace pulled away his hand from Alec’s shoulder, panting in complete exhaustion. When the _Virtutis_ rune was activated, Jace could literally feel his energy was being transferred to Alec in rapid pace. He could feel Alec’s fear and confusion even clearer in that state compared to how he felt through _Parabatai_ bond. Jace glanced at Alec, who was currently gasping and trembling from the endless string of pain and hardship - from hours fighting the demons to many minutes of bearing agonising pain, but no longer _dying._ And Jace knew that even though he was drained dry, a huge portion of him felt very elated for finally being able to help Alec.

The exact moment when the vision had finally let off its claws from Alec's mind and Jace pulled back his hand, Magnus gathered the already senseless man so close to his heart. Relief flooded through his entire body frame. He closed his eyes to stop the tears from falling.

“Oh, thank God….” He whispered, thanking heaven for the first time in centuries.

* * * * *


	7. It doesn’t matter whether you are his friend or lover, for the love transcends over labels

 

* * *

  _Don't you know that you've always been mine?_

_Mine to protect, to love, to keep and to cherish;_

_Whether you're my lover or friend, it makes no never mind,_

_For I'll be here with you until my life is perished._

 

_So, don't go too far away from me, darling,_

_Don't go to the places that I cannot follow you;_

_And if the fate insisted in us parting,_

_Then, you can be sure I'll find a way to go too_

* * *

 

“Are you sure he’ll come, Magnus?” Jace said in agitation. He was pacing in Magnus’s living room, nervous energy was barely contained.

Magnus was no less restless compared to Jace. The warlock kept picking up and putting down the jars at the dark mahogany shelves. He shoved his worry down in the pretense of stock-taking his spell ingredients and rearranging the books. “He is compelled to come. The High Warlock is demanding his presence and by the rules of warlock community, he cannot refuse.” Magnus answered calmly. His tone was in complete contrast with his harried movement.

He looked at the way Jace kept looking out the window. He understood Jace’s agitation; he shared it. Ever since the day Jace received _Virtutis_ rune, the visions came to Alec like waves, one after another continuously and exhaustively. Something was now different in the way Alec received the vision. With Jace’s assistance, Alec no longer losing his consciousness after each vision but it didn’t mean the visions were pain-free. It was as if Jace provided the needed power for Alec to see the vision without taxing his body as quickly as before. However, the pain still caused Alec’s health to deteriorate but at least, they were granted more time to figure this out.

The continuous visions also indicated that the interval period of resting that Alec was usually granted, was now taken away. Jace tried to do his part as much as he could as the blond Shadowhunter stuck beside Alec like a leech. Since only Jace had the power to assist Alec, he was afraid of _not_ being there when Alec needed him - not when the memory of Alec dying was still so fresh in everyone’s mind.

Magnus was grateful for that. He was grateful that Jace could help Alec in _some_ way. Even though Jace’s _Virtutis_ rune didn’t take the excruciating pain away from Alec, but at least, Alec didn’t have to fight the battle alone. But at the same, Magnus couldn’t help feeling a little bit of envious at Jace for being able to help Alec. Oh, he knew that if anyone could help Alec, of course it would be Jace. Jace was both his _parabatai_ and a Shadowhunter. He was born to bear the rune. He had the required angel-blood to help Alec.

And Magnus didn’t.

No matter how deep Magnus’s love was towards Alec, he was still half-demon. He was an offspring of Asmodeus, a Prince of Hell. How could a demon like him mix with an angel like Alec?

The thought tasted bitter in his mouth.

Magnus tried to hide his resentment at his own inadequacy even though he knew he was not to be blamed for who he was. He _knew_ that. He had hundreds of years accepting of he was. But, by the Heavens above, Magnus wanted, so very much, to share Alec’s burden. Magnus wanted to make the path easier for Alec. Magnus still wanted to be the one Alec turned to when he needed any kind of help. He wanted to love and assist and be there for Alec in any way that he could.

He would always be Alec’s keeper until the day the Shadowhunter died - old and gray and happy.

But all that he could do was watched Alec being bombarded with vision after vision throughout the whole week. It was as if the Angels knew that with Jace now able to assist Alec, they could keep sending visions without outright killing their messenger. There was an intense sense of urgency in those ceaseless visions and they always showed the same thing: a rift being opened, a creature came out and Alec was somehow supposed to restrain the creature from escaping. There was nothing new in every visit and that made Magnus feel furious beyond belief. He wished he could summon the angels like he summoned the demons and asked them why did they think torturing Alec with useless visions was a necessity? If they had nothing new to show them, why would they keep sending the visions?

And these relentless visions were taking heavy toll on Alec and, to some lesser degree, to Jace as well because the blond Shadowhunter insisted on giving his strength to Alec; insisted on ensuring Alec wouldn’t suffer like he did before Jace received the rune.

Seeing all these made Magnus frustrated. He counted each second that passed with patience as thin as a paper as he waited for the vision to be over and time had never before felt so slow. The waiting made him feel useless. For all his magic and knowledge, he couldn’t help the man he loved. When Alec received the vision for the nth time, Magnus was so ready to blow the whole ground in utter, utter frustration. Alec looked so goddamn wasted, so frighteningly unhealthy and so very, very exhausted. It was the agony that Alec endured without respite that was killing him. His system needed to heal and the continuous crippling pain didn’t help him at all. In his heart, Magnus knew that if they couldn’t stop this visions, eventually Alec would lose out of this endless struggle, with or without Jace’s help.

Jace knew that as well. Magnus could see in the mismatched eyes that if he had his ways, he would activate all his runes just to save Alec even from the slightest of pain from the vision. But it didn’t work that way.

The _Virtutis_ rune was not the answer; it was merely a mean for an extension.

They were still on the race to decipher the Angels’ visions and to save Alec’s life.

And that was why they were here. The rest of the gang had decided that they couldn’t just wait for the Angels to tell them; they needed to take proactive actions. Hence, when Alec succumbed to his exhaustion and slept, Isabelle and Clary stayed beside Alec while Magnus sent a fire message to Edward Stone, ordering him to see the High Warlock. Jace insisted in accompanying Magnus for the interrogation.

Suddenly, both of them stopped in their activity when they heard a knock on Magnus’s door. Edward Stone was finally here. Magnus gestured Jace to stand behind him as he took a seat, assuming his authority. Taking a deep breath, Magnus resumed his High Warlock’s face and flicked his fingers to undo his ward and open his door.

In the doorway, a tall, distinguished-looking man stood.

“Thank you for coming here, Mr. Stone.” Magnus said with Jace standing behind him, with his hands clasped at his back, his mismatched eyes studied the tall warlock intensely. All of the previous nervous motions disappeared in the face of their guest.

Edward Stone nodded as he walked towards them. He hesitated before sitting in the opposite chair in his impeccable vintage suit with his black hair slicked back.

“I can’t possibly refuse the request of the High Warlock, can I? It would be unseemly.” Edward answered. “Why did you call me here, Magnus Bane? I have told the Head of Institute of New York that I have nothing to do with the demonic attacks in the east side of Brooklyn. And he concurs with me.”

“What transpires between you and Alec Lightwood is The Clave business. I call you because of a warlock business.” Magnus said cooly.

“A warlock business,” Edward echoed in disbelief. “Then, will you care to explain to me why does this Shadowhunter loom behind you?” Edward looked at Jace, tone of his voice hardened. “Who are you?”

“My name is Jace Herondale. A colleague of High Warlock Magnus Bane.” Jace said. Edward frowned when Jace offered no more information.

“Anyway,” Magnus waved the moment away. “I’ve asked around, and nobody seems to be able to verify your identity. Nobody seems to know you from anywhere.”

“I told you-” Edward started.

“You told me that you’ve isolated yourself for a century.” Magnus finished Edward’s sentence. “You should also know that for a community that has an average lifespan of 300 years, a mere century of hiding away doesn’t cause you to be completely forgotten.”

Edward jaws clenched.

“There’s something about you, Mr. Stone, that bothers me.” Magnus said as he purposely leaned forward. “The way everything seems to coincidentally relate back to you. How you simply appeared from nowhere. And how you seem purposely vague in telling us about yourself. So, tell me who you are, really.”

Edward frowned at Magnus’s words. Instead of answering Magnus’s question, he asked, “What do you mean everything seems to coincidentally relate back to me? Has something happened more than just the demonic attacks?”

Jace raised his eyebrows infinitesimally at Edward’s shrewd mind.

“Tell me who are you first,” Magnus insisted coldly. “I can’t tell anything to someone who doesn’t say truthfully who he is.”

The tall warlock tightened his lips into a thin line, clearly displeased at Magnus’s insistence. Jace could see something brewing inside the man; perhaps weighing whether to accept Magnus’s offer of information exchange or to simply leave. “Does the ‘thing’ has something to do with warlock community?” Edward asked.

Magnus and Jace exchanged glances but both of them keep their mouth shut.

“You know, I could just walk away from here,” Edward said as he stood up. “You have nothing to hold me against. No evidence, no connections, just a string of whatever coincidences that you’re telling me about.”

“This will not go away, Mr. Stone.” Magnus said in quiet authority. “You can walk away, but the second another demonic attack occurs, you know that you’ll back here for another round of questionings. And that, will be an awful inconvenience for you.”

“Other than my current residence that happens to be the area of the demonic attacks, what are other bases of your accusations?” Edward snapped. “You’re not being fair, High Warlock.”

“Tell me who you really are first.” Magnus said, not moving an inch. Jace was secretly impressed just how unperturbed Magnus was.

Edward stared at Magnus for a few moments. Jace could practically see the internal battle raging between Magnus and Edward as both were unwilling to give up their secrets. This kind of exchange frustrated him because ever since Alec had nearly died from the vision, Jace had been antsy and restless and impatient. He was not like Magnus, who could expertly push down his worries, fears and angers, and appeared to be so goddamn cool on the surface.

So, when Jace saw Edward turn around to walk out of Magnus’s loft, instinct caused him lash out his hand to grab the tall warlock’s shoulder. “Wait!” Jace snapped. “Just where do you think you’re going?”

Edward spun around to face Jace and in his face was a subtle sneer. “Ah… the Shadowhunter is finally speaking up. What are you going to do? Arrest me? Imprison me in the City of Bones? Torture me until I speak?”

“What?” Jace asked, taken aback at the sudden attack from Edward. “Why would you think that? I’m a Shadowhunter, I hunt demons and not randomly making Downworlders’ lives miserable. Wake up and smell the coffee of 21st century!”

“Shadowhunters will never change,” Edward said with his dark eyes narrowed. “I’ve been dealing with the Clave for far too long to realise that every change that they are aspiring is nothing more than a mere rhetoric.”

Magnus rose from his seat to smoothly interject Edward’s words. “We can discuss the drawbacks of the Clave until the end of the time, but right now, I need to know who you are. And whether I should consider you a threat.”

“A threat?” Edward echoed. “To whom?”

“Look, Mr. Stone-” Jace started as he withdraw his hand away from the tall warlock. But before he could withdraw his hand, Edward reached up instantly to grab at Jace’s hand and turned his palm upwards.

“Hey!” Jace protested but his protest died when he saw Edward’s eyes widen and heard the sharp inhale when the warlock looked at Jace’s hand.

Magnus’s eyes widened at Edward’s reaction at Jace’s _Virtutis_ rune. The healing burned mark looked slightly swollen around the edge. “Wait, you recognise this rune?” Magnus demanded. How could Edward know? Clary saw this rune in her vision; there should not be any record about it anywhere.  

“It’s…” Edward swallowed hard, before tearing his eyes away from the rune to look at Jace’s face. His black eyes were wide in utter shock. “It’s an _Amor et virtutis vinctum_ rune… But it’s impossible. It’s impossible for you to have this rune.”

“What do you mean impossible?” Jace asked, snatching his hand away from Edward’s grasp.

“Because it’s the Angel’s rune.” Edward said.

“Of course this is an angelic rune,” Jace said with a ‘duh’ unspoken at the end of the sentence. “I’m a Shadowhunter, and we derive power from angelic marks.”

“No,” Edward insisted. “Not angelic runes. _The_ Angel’s rune. The Angel _Raziel’s_ rune. The only way you could have this rune is when you’ve communicated directly with the Angels, which no Shadowhunters of today are able to do, let alone bearing this rune. You must be amongst, I don’t know, from the first line of Shadowhunters that Angel Raziel created with his blood. But that’s impossible, the Shadowhunters today do not have this trait.”

“How do you know all these?” Magnus asked suspiciously.

“What?” Edward said incredulously, reading Magnus’s words between the lines. “You meant to say that there is a Shadowhunter who can communicate with the angels directly? At this age?”

“Yes,” Jace said firmly. “There is a Shadowhunter who can do that.”

Edward looked lost for words. His mouth opened to answer Jace’s words but nothing came out. Eventually, he said, “Then, tell me, who is the _Receptorem_?”

“ _Receptorem…_ What do you mean by the word Receiver?” Magnus frowned.

“Jace is clearly the _Dantis_ because the _Virtutis_ rune is marked on his palm.” Edward said, gesturing at Jace’s hand. “The _Virtutis_ rune requires two bearers for it to work, the _Receptorem_ \- a receiver -  and the _Dantis_ \- the giver - in order for it to work.”

The amazement on Magnus and Jace’s face was stark. They were both left speechless at Edward’s statements.

“It’s - It’s Alec,” Jace answered faintly. This meeting with Edward didn’t go the way they expected. It made Jace’s head spin. “Alec is the… the receiver. Now will you tell me how you know about all of these.”

“Alec Lightwood?” Edward breathed, clearly impressed. “Who would have thought…”

“Well?” Magnus cut in impatiently. He didn’t want to hear this warlock mooning over _his_ Shadowhunter and he was anxious to finally knowing the purpose of _Virtutis_ rune.

“It’ll be quite a story,” Edward warned. “I suggest we all sit down first.”

Magnus and Jace exchanged looks before the warlock gestured his guest to have a seat and magicking cold drinks on the table. Everyone assumed their previous positions in exception of Jace, who took a seat beside Magnus, facing Edward.

“Remember when we first met, Magnus, that I said I have lived for a long time. I wasn’t exaggerating. I did live quite a long life. I can’t even remember my age, but I reckon it is definitely more than a thousand years old. When I was presented with my warlock mark, not many even know what a warlock is. I was an outcast, driven away from everybody. I was accused of being a demon or even The Devil’s advocate. The Earth was young and it was recently tainted by the presence of demons. I was among the firsts of many demons’ offsprings, the firsts of the warlocks, the firsts of the Downworlders. And I was among the first to see the Nephilims ascended from mere humans to beings that shared angelic blood.”

“What?” Jace said in utter amazement. “You meant you saw Jonathan, the Crusader?”

“Maybe,” Edward smiled. “More than a thousand years ago, it was the world riddled with wars between humans and wars between humans and demons. The few warlocks that were around at that time were simply trying to survive. When we see how strong and pure the Nephilims were, many of us decided to side with the Nephilims in the war against the demons, even though we are the descendants of the demons themselves. A strange outcome, but I guess the human side would always be stronger for we keep on siding with the Nephilims. Even until now.” Edward glanced at Magnus when he said that. Magnus swallowed hard but didn’t say anything in return. It was true, the warlocks might dabble with demons - summoning them, using them - but in the end, they would always side with the Nephilims, no matter how high-handed the Clave had become.

“It came to a time when we faced a threat like never before. A rift was opened by an immensely powerful warlock named Samuel, an offspring of a Greater Demon. However, this rift was unlike any other rifts - it didn’t open to other dimensions that we knew of. We didn’t know how he did it, but this rift was a gateway to a place that we had not the name for it. We didn’t know what lived beneath it - but for as long as I lived, I will never forget the sound it made.” Edward said as his eyes looked in faraway past. “It was the most terrible thing that you could have ever imagined hearing. The memories of its piercing screeching had kept me up in countless nightmares.”

“But you didn’t see the creature?” Magnus asked. “It didn’t come out?”

“No, I didn’t, which I am foreverly grateful.” Edward took a comforting sip from his drink. That particular part of his history was so unpleasant that Edward knew he would never be able to forget it for as long as he lived. “The warlocks had tried to close the rift but we failed because there was something about the rift that felt so unnatural to us. Something about our demonic magic that caused our efforts to be non-effective when we tried to close it. It simply neutralized our magic. Luckily, the world was spared from witnessing this unknown creature because of two reasons. One, the rift was unstable. I noticed that the summoning circle was not strong enough to withstand the sheer power of the dimensional tunnel. Second, there were two Nephilims - a _Parabatai_ pair - stood at the edge of the rift. Some sort angelic power came out of them and unlike our demonic magic, this angelic power somehow was able to force the rift to close.”

Jace’s eyes were wide. Did it mean him and Alec were supposed to be closing the rift? “Since when Shadowhunters are able to close magical portal?” Jace asked sceptically. “Shadowhunters can’t use magic.”

“We were as surprise as you, back then.” Edward said. “But the Nephilims did it; they close the rift.  My guess is that the rift contained more than just magic, maybe it contained a pure demonic element that only a pure angel’s power could neutralise.”

“And why did Samuel open the rift in the first place? What was his purpose?” Jace said.

Edward paused at Jace’s question. Carefully he said, “You have to understand. Back then we had very little knowledge about the Shadow worlds. There were still no Vampires or Werewolves that carried the demonic diseases. We were either fully human or half-demon or half-angel and the prejudice against the warlocks’ marks were… suffice to say... horrific.”

“Imagine a primitive society, who scorned at anything that was unexplainable or inhuman or even slightly devilish. We were hunted, burned, tortured and killed. On the other hand, the Nephilims were half-angels. Warlocks didn’t really stand a chance - we either turned quite good or bad. Samuel was a product of that vicious environment and, along his tragic path, he chose to be very, very bad.” He sighed. “As for his specific purpose? And how he managed to open such an impossible portal? I’m afraid I have no answer for that.”

“Tell me something,” Magnus asked quietly. “How did you stay as you are, Edward?” He couldn’t imagine growing up, bearing the warlock’s marks and had no mentor or even a proper environment to guide him through all those phases of confusion and fear. Yes, his parents were nothing to be proud of, but at least, he was taken in by the Silent Brother and the warlock community was established, so, he had places to ask for shelter and knowledge.

Edward curved a small, self-depreciating smile. “I’m not a saint, Magnus. I have done things I am terribly ashamed of. There was a few times when I stumbled and was nearly driven off the path. But I guess I cling too hard on my human side that the thought of succumbing entirely into the demonic side is unacceptable. I don’t know, maybe there is a part of me that is still hoping for some sort of salvation.”

Magnus nodded his head. He understood Edward too well. He was also searching for any signs of redemption and salvation in all those long years of loneliness. And he found them in Alec.

“So…” Edward continued on. “While the _Parabatai_ pair was closing the rift, the supporters of Samuel and the Nephilims with their alliance army were fighting each other. I was one of the Nephilims-sided warlocks. The last time I saw Samuel, he had fallen down over a cliff and we couldn’t feel his magic anymore. He was dead.” Edward said. “We didn’t know why he did this or what was his endgame. He took it to his grave.”

“Now, the _Parabatai_ pair had the same rune as you did, Jace. One of them told us that the Angels came to his dream and showed him the _Virtutis_ rune. The Angels told him the rune couldn’t be applied to any Shadowhunters; that they must be chosen by the Angels. The _Virtutis_ rune acted in symphony with the _Parabatai_ rune. We all know that the _Parabatai_ rune enabled them to draw each other’s power and to enhance the strength but it’s only to a certain limit.” Edward took a deep breath, as he began explaining.

“The _Virtutis_ rune, on the other hands, allows the _Dantis_ to focus all of his strength and energy into the _Receptorem_ , making the one who received the power of the _Dantis_ to transform himself into something else - something bigger than just a Nephilim. When the rune is activated, the _Receptorem_ becomes what we describe as the closest level to a human being becoming an Angel because he received the other half of the angel trait from the _Dantis_. The _Receptorem_ becomes a full-blooded Angel- well, technically speaking. And that level of power had enabled him to use the Angel’s power that no other Nephilims could, which mean - I guess, closing the impossible rift.” Edward said.

Looking at Jace, he smiled softly. “That’s why I said _Virtutis_ rune is _The_ Angel’s rune. It made a half-blooded human like a Nephilim ascended to the Angel’s level. Ah, and you should have seen the way the _Receptorem_ changed…” Edward gushed at the memory. “I thought it was something that I can only see once in my long, long life. But… you’ve proven me wrong.”

Jace was speechless. He thought this rune had only the purpose of assisting Alec getting through the vision. He never thought that it could be so much more than that. But, if Alec had indeed becoming an Angel when the rune was activated, why did he still feel all those crippling, torturous pain from the vision? Why did he still suffer? Why was he still _dying_? “This _Parabatai_ pair,” Jace asked hesitantly. “The one who received the dream… did he say anything about feeling any pain when he received the vision?”

Edward furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “I told you, the humans were recently ascended to Nephilim, their angel blood was directly from Angel _Raziel_. Receiving visions from the Angels was uncommon but not totally unheard of. Some of the earliest Shadowhunters did have the ability to communicate with the angel. Why do you ask?”

Jace was hesitant to tell Alec’s predication and judging from the way Magnus’s choice to keep quiet, the warlock also held the same reservation. Even though their initial suspicion about Edward was wrong, the ancient warlock was still a stranger. Instead, Magnus succinctly said, “We received an intel that there is an attempt to re-open the rift that you describes to us just now.”

“What?!” Edward cried as he abruptly stood up. “Are you sure? Where did you get this intel?”

“I’m not comfortable in sharing-” Magnus started to say evasively before Edward cut in sharply.

“I’ve told you everything that I know about the rune, High Warlock Bane. I think it’s time for you to return the favour and tell me everything you know about this!”

Magnus looked at Jace, weighing his options. Jace nodded his head imperceptibly, telling Magnus that he would trust the warlock’s judgement, whether to tell Edward the whole truth or not. After a few seconds, Magnus let out a soft sigh, before saying, “Seeing that Alec is the _Receptorem,_ it would make sense that he is the one who receives the visions from the angels about the impending doom. He sees the rift being opened and he sees the creature that you said didn’t succeed escaping from the last time. He also sees himself as someone who was somehow restraining the creature with the _Virtutis_ rune.”

Edward’s face was drained of blood as the mention of the creature. “He…  He _saw_ the _creature_?” This was beyond Edward’s wildest belief. All those years being haunted by its screechings and screams, he couldn’t believe Alec saw the creature in his vision. Those sounds were still the worst thing he had ever heard and he had summoned countless demons with different shapes and sounds during his long, long history as a warlock. Edward still remembered the way the ground shook as if an earthquake had struck the area and the deafening sounds coming from below, warning them - scaring all of the Nephilims and their allies out of their wits.

“Yes, Alec saw it,” Jace said. Then the blond Shadowhunter curved a small smirk when he remembered something else. “You know what? Better yet, Alec drew the creature, if you would like to see it.”

“WHAT?”

* * * * * *   

Isabelle peeked through the door of her brother’s room for a countless time and sighed in relief to see Alec was still sleeping. Still, Isabelle came into the room, tiptoeing towards Alec to check him. Isabelle sighed in deep unhappiness and fear at the way Alec’s prominent cheekbones stood out even more so and the way Alec’s skin was a in a perpetual state of white-pale. The shallow rises and falls of Alec’s chest were the only evidence that Alec was still alive in otherwise corpse-like state that Alec was in.

Last week was a long and endless nightmare for Isabelle. She saw her brother almost dying from the visions, saved by Jace using the rune that was seen by Clary and then, be tortured all over again by the repetitive visions. To make the matter even worse, Alec couldn’t resume his tasks as the Head of Institute anymore; not when the visions hit him more than once in a day, causing the tall Shadowhunter to realise that he might not be able to execute his duties as a Head of Institute while dealing with this whole ordeal. So, he reluctantly sent a long fire message to the Clave, explaining the situation and requesting an acting Head of Institute to be appointed.

And that, of course, caused a series of questions to be asked and created another set of drama, as their mother descended upon them like wrathful angel for keeping this as a secret and the Clave clamouring for the answers after spending two days grilling them for information. During the two-day of the Clave’s inquisition, they had witnessed Alec being hit by vision while he was being questioned. The Clave envoy had stood still in utter shock at the horrific display and it took a loud, crashing of a door opened by Jace, who heard Alec’s distress cry from outside the room, to snap the envoy from their shock.

The Clave witnessed the rune being used and that, apparently, was all the proof they needed. Isabelle thought that it was a blessing that Magnus was not there to witness that because she was pretty sure Magnus would storm into the inquisition process alongside Jace, and that would not have been pretty. The only reason that held Magnus back for as long as he did was the fact that Jace was there to support Alec the whole time. The sigh of relief that Isabelle let out when Alec was released before Magnus could do anything stupid was so heartfelt. Up until today, they received no further information from the Clave or even the Silent Brothers on the creature that Alec was supposed to stop.

The long week finally came to a temporary stop. For a moment, there was no meeting to attend, no representatives from Idris that needed to be entertained, no wrath from Maryse that needed to be placated and there were no visions to be endured. For a moment, Alec was finally allowed to sleep. Magnus gave him a sleeping potion to help stave off the headache and to help him sleep longer and better. As soon as his head hit the pillow, Alec lost his consciousness and then the four of them spent some time discussing the next course of action and they all agreed that they couldn’t simply wait for the Clave to give them some answers.

Magnus mentioned that he and Jace didn’t have the chance to interview Edward Stone before all these incidents happened. Now that they had some sort respite, Magnus wanted to resume with his original plan of talking to Edward Stone. Perhaps the suspicious warlock had some information that they didn’t. Magnus assured them that he could handle the warlock all on his own and said that Jace should probably stay here and look after Alec, in case the vision came visiting. But Jace insisted on accompanying the warlock, saying that it could be more than just a few hours before Alec wake up and really, Jace wanted to see the man who could possibly be the root of his _parabatai’s_ sufferings.

Isabelle had to watch the two of them argued for a few minutes before she exasperatedly intervened. Those two overprotective, overbearing people were making Isabelle frustrated and she wanted to sock both of them in the head sometimes.  

“Both of you! Just go and see the warlock!” Isabelle said sternly with both of her hands rested on her hips. “Clary and I can take care of Alec while you guys talk to Edward Stone. I have both of your numbers on a speed-dial, should Alec wake up before you finish.”

That was six hours ago. As Isabelle quietly left Alec’s room, she was startled to see Clary sit on a bench in front of Alec’s room. She smiled at the redhead. “Hey, I thought I told you to take a rest.”

Clary looked up from her sketching pad and returned Isabelle’s smile. “I can’t. I’m too restless to sleep. I guess I’m anxious for Jace and Magnus’s return. I wonder what does this Edward Stone have to say.”

Isabelle took a heavy seat beside Clary and leaned against the wall. “Whatever it is, I hope it will be useful. I don’t think Alec can take much more of this.” The melancholy in Isabelle’s voice was unhidden and unrestrained that had caused Clary to quickly cover Isabelle’s hand in comfort.

“Yeah, I hope so too.” Clary said.

“So, what are you drawing?” Isabelle asked, changing the subject.

“Huh?” Clary looked down at her own sketch pad. “Uh, I hope you don’t mind. I was just passing by, looking for something to draw and then, I saw you in Alec’s room. You look so sweet caring after Alec that I took the liberty of sketching you and Alec. Here.” She showed her rough drawings to Isabelle.

Isabelle looked at the drawing and something heavy and painful tugged at her heart. Clary was so talented that even in her rough sketching, she managed to capture the lights streaming down on them beautifully. Isabelle looked at the way Clary drew her concern face as she leaned down to pull the blanket over Alec’s body. It hurt Isabelle to see how sick Alec looked in this drawing and how the fear was so stark on her own face. Fear for her brother’s impending mortality and the helpless she felt of not being able to do anything to help him. And yet, Isabelle loved the subtle quality of tenderness between them. “I like it,” Isabelle said hoarsely. “Thank you, Clary.”

“It's not finished yet. I'm planning to draw the whole details in my room later.”

“It would look stunning,” Isabelle nodded her head. “I can’t wait to see it.”

“How's Alec?” Clary asked softly.

“He's still sleeping. But-” Isabelle halted before sighing. “He looks so sick and thin. I don’t understand it. How can these visions render my healthy, toned brother into this state for a mere month?”

Clary shrugged her shoulders helplessly. “I wish I could help him.”

Isabelle turned towards Clary and gaped in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? Clary, you saw the rune that saved Alec’s life. You are the reason Alec was sleeping in his room right now. I can never thank you enough for that.”

Clary smiled softly. After that, both girls shared a comfortable silence with the sounds of Clary’s drawing acted as background music. Half an hour later, they heard footsteps echoing through the corridor and they jumped to stand in eager curiosity when Jace and Magnus came to their view. Isabelle started to open her mouth to begin her interrogation but was halted when she saw another unknown, tall figure walked behind Magnus and Jace. “Who’s that?” Isabelle frowned.

“Izzy, Clary, this is Edward Stone.” Jace introduced.

Isabelle’s eyes widened at the sight of the warlock who had shamelessly asked Alec to call him a few weeks back. As Isabelle scrutinised the man, she had to admit that Edward Stone hit all of Alec’s favourable points. But Isabelle also knew that it would mean nothing at all because Alec was so head-over-heel in love with Magnus that no one could measure up to Magnus, even if her stubborn brother was too scared to admit it. “Hello, Mr. Stone,” Isabelle stepped forward and put out her hand. “I’m Isabelle Lightwood, Alec’s sister.”

“I had thought so,” Edward said charmingly. Instead of shaking her hand, Edward kissed the top of her hand. “The resemblance is incredibly striking. The Lightwoods are certainly blessed with beauty.”

Isabelle couldn’t help herself from stopping the heat rising on her cheeks. Behind Edward, Isabelle could see Magnus rolling his eyes and Jace miming a gag. “Yes, we do,” Isabelle said haughtily, regaining her confidence quickly. It had been quite some time since any man managed to cause her to blush. “Some people are simply too green with envy to admit this.” She said, arching her eyebrows at Jace and Magnus.

Magnus smiled good-naturedly while Jace continued miming his gag.

Clary reached towards Jace to smack him on his shoulders. Then, she turned to Edward and introduced herself. “And I am Clary Fairchild.”

“Hello, Clary.” Edward replied, repeating the gesture that he did to Isabelle to Clary. _Such a gentleman._ Isabelle thought. The warlock really did look like he just stepped out of a time-travelling portal with his vintage suits and his accents and the way he handled society interactions.

“Why don’t you guys wait for Alec in his office while I go and see whether he is awaken yet,” Isabelle said and she watched the group walk towards the main office before she turned to Alec’s room.

“Alec?” Isabelle called quietly. When she received no answer, she opened the door slowly and saw the bed was empty. A muted sound from the bathroom indicated that Alec was in the shower. So, Isabelle sat on one of the chairs, waiting for him to finish. When Alec finally stepped out of the bathroom, Isabelle bit her lips hard at the sight of her emaciated brother. A towel was wrapped around his waist and Isabelle could count the ribs on his chest. The feeling of unhappiness was back, weighing her down.

“Izzy.” Alec was startled at his sister sudden appearance. “Couldn’t you knock?”

Isabelle smiled at the grumpy tone. Some things would always stay the same after all. “Magnus and Jace are back. They are all waiting for you in your office.”

Alec rummaged through his wardrobe and carelessly pulled out one of the many black, loose sweaters that he had. As he pulled on his boxer and jeans and the sweater - completely unperturbed at Isabelle’s presence - Alec asked, “How long was I asleep?”

Isabelle watched her brother’s messy dark hair in exasperated fondness. She stood up and grab a comb on the dresser. “Nearly six hours. Not long enough, apparently, judging by the look of that racoon eyes.” Alec stood patiently as Isabelle comb through his unkempt hair. Long history of living with Isabelle had taught Alec to motionlessly accept her ministration. She continued, “Are you feeling rested enough?”

Alec bent down to search for his boots. “Well enough. I can’t seem to shake off this exhaustion no matter how long I sleep,” he answered, tying up the laces of his shoes.

“Hey,” Isabelle said, cupping her brother’s cheeks to force him to look up at her. “If you wanted a longer rest, we will give it to you. Lydia had the Institute well under control. And Magnus and Jace can debrief Clary and I without you. You don’t have to push yourself too hard.”

Alec reached up to hold Isabelle’s hand. “No, I can do this. Plus, I don’t think the exhaustion would go away only by sleeping.” he said. “Come on, let’s go.”

Isabelle nodded her head and followed her brother to his office.

As soon as Alec stepped into the room, he was stopped dead at the sight of Edward Stone amongst his friends and family. “Edward!” He said, stunned. “What are you doing here?”

“Alec,” Edward smiled at Alec before a frown replaced his smile at the sight of sick-looking man in front of him. “What in the world happen to you?” He exclaimed, walking towards the dark-haired Shadowhunter. “You looked robust and healthy when I saw you a fortnight ago. Now you look…”

“Unhealthy, I know,” Alec interrupted, still bewildered at Edward’s presence. He didn’t know how much Magnus and Jace had told Edward what was happening to him. Speaking of Magnus, Alec surreptitiously glanced at the warlock, feeling irrationally so damn guilty that he didn’t know why he felt like this. The said warlock was busying himself looking at the books that Alec had in his room, clearly didn’t want to see the interaction between Alec and Edward. To others, Magnus might appear nonchalant but Alec knew Magnus. He could see something unpleasant was brewing underneath that unassuming face. _Oh Angels…_ Alec thought. _This is mortifying._

“So, what brings you here?” Alec said, smoothly pulling himself away from Edward before the warlock could fuss over him and walked toward his own chair. Alec had never been comfortable being touched by people he didn’t know.

Jace took the liberty of explaining everything to the group while Edward chipped in once in a while. After Jace had finished, the silence in the room was deafening. Isabelle and Clary were left speechless. Alec opened his mouth to say something but found out that he had absolutely nothing to add. This whole situation was so bizarre and so unlikely that Alec didn't know whether he should believe it or laugh at the absurdity of it all. At last, he managed to say in great disbelief, “Jace is supposed to help me to become an… an Angel? Me? Have the Angels met me before?”

Magnus let out a surprise laugh at Alec’s unexpected, sarcastic words. “Alexander! That is your take of the whole situation?”

Edward was taken aback. _Alec is an Alexander?_ He never knew that and wondered how did Magnus know about this. Plus, the way Magnus caressed the word _Alexander_ along his tone sounded kind of intimate.

Alec met Magnus’s eyes, still flabbergasted. “Magnus, tell me I’m not the only one who thinks me becoming an Angel is so… far-fetched! If there’s anyone who is more equipped to become an Angel, it would be Clary! She’s already received the runic vision from the angels, for God’s sake!”

“The rune required _Parabatai_ rune to work, remember?” Magnus said.

“But still...” Alec bit his lips.

“Oh, so Miss Fairchild is the one who receives vision about _Virtutis_ rune?” Edward asked. “And you received the visions about the creature?” He turned towards Alec.

“Yes.” Alec replied. He felt lightheaded at this revelation.

“This is quite unlike what happened the last time,” Edward said thoughtfully. “The _Parabatai_ pair received both visions on the _Virtutis_ rune and how to close the rift. I can't recall any mention by them about another person in the equation. There must be something different in this time around.”

Isabelle thought this for a while before saying, “You said the rift was closed because the summoning circle was unable to sustain the power and it caused the rift to become unstable. Did you know why?”

“No, I don’t. I've often wondered that,” Edward said. “The summoning circle is like an address. If you draw correct symbols in the circle, you can open the portal to the place that you want to go or to the place where the demon that you want to call upon is. The warlock’s magic was crucial in maintaining the portal or the rift - not the circle itself. But Samuel’s rift required both magic from the summoner and the summoning circle. I could feel the magic coursing through the summoning circle.”

“What does that mean?” Magnus protested. “Since when a summoning circle creates its own magic? You’re not making any sense.”

“I’m just telling you what I saw, Magnus.” Edward said. “Maybe Samuel knew a way to do that. He had already opened a rift to an unknown dimension and that rift could not be closed by any warlock. Tell me, since when warlocks could not undo any magical portal? Who knows what else was he capable of doing?”

“The fact that the circle contained its own magic may explain why I can’t erase the circle. Maybe the ritual has something to do with the ink used in drawing of the circle,” Isabelle offered. She proceeded telling Edward about the strange-like ink that they found in the cave.

“Ichor-like inks?” Edward repeated. “Do you think it has something to do with the recent increased demonic attacks in the East Side Brooklyn that you people keep on accusing me for? Maybe somebody was summoning the demons and used their ichor in the summoning circle. Which for me, is completely unheard of.”

Magnus hummed. “So, you’re saying the last the time the rift opened, there was no evidence that this ichor-like ink was used? That this is something new?” He, then flicked his fingers and immediately a drawing of the summoning circle was pinned neatly at Alec’s noticeboard. “Does this look familiar?” Magnus asked Edward. “Is this the same summoning circle that Samuel used previously.”

Edward looked at the drawing and a sharp inhale was heard. “Oh my, I haven’t seen this circle for hundreds of years… You know, when the Nephilims closed the rift, the circle disappeared. None of us warlock had the chance of keeping any record of this summoning circle. But yes, this look exactly like the one Samuel drew previously. Look at these symbols! We never truly know where did Samuel learn all these obscure symbols.”

“If that is the case, then using demonic ichor is somehow significant.” Magnus said. “Can it be used to stabilise the rift? You said that the last time it happened, the rift was unstable.” Edward simply shrugged his shoulders at Magnus words, clueless as well.

“So, where does this leave us?” Alec asked rubbing his tired face; he was always the pragmatic one. “If Samuel was dead, then where does that leave us? We have no suspect and no motive and there is a summoning circle that cannot be erased. How are we supposed to stop this from happening?”

No one in the room could answer Alec’s question.

“I have a another question,” Jace suddenly said quietly and all eyes were on him. “If the _Virtutis_ rune is supposed to allow Alec to use my… energy or whatever to become an Angel, why doesn’t he be that during those many times that we have used it when Alec has the visions? So far, what we’ve witnessed is that the rune simply helps Alec to see the vision through my assistance.”

Edward looked thoughtful. After a few moments of contemplation, the ancient warlock said, “I can’t answer that accurately. But keep in mind, the last and the only _Parabatai_ pair who had this rune didn’t have any problem communicating with the angels like Alec does. So… I don’t know, have you tried using the rune when Alec _doesn’t_ have the vision? Maybe it’ll have different effect. Or maybe it’ll work like it is supposed to.”

Alec and Jace were rendered speechless. The thought of using the rune outside the visions had never even crossed their mind.

Magnus cleared his throat. “If you both plan to do that anytime soon, I’d appreciate it if you would inform me beforehand, just in case.”

Edward looked at Magnus thoughtfully, considering the High Warlock. The man was awfully invested in these Shadowhunters. He had never seen a warlock offering his help to the Nephilims without expecting any kind of payment. And these Shadowhunters simply nodded their head in agreement without any argument like they wouldn’t expect Magnus to say anything less than that. It was like the warlock was more than just a simple consultant. Or a colleague.

They treated Magnus like a _family_.

The trust between the warlock and this group of Shadowhunters ran unfathomably deep and it staggered the ancient warlock. Edward wondered how Magnus and the Nephilims became like this. This kind of dynamic was something he had never witnessed before. Had he been gone for too long?

Maybe he should take Jace Herondale’s advice. He probably should wake up and the smell the coffee of the 21st Century.

* * * * *


	8. This love that you wish to receive, requires sacrifice you may not be willing to give

 

* * *

  _An ascension towards Heaven is awe-inspiring,_

_I have never seen you more beautiful and enticing;_

_But I still want you grounded down here with me,_

_Don’t go too far away wherever you maybe._

 

_I don’t think you understand the word eternal,_

_How it will transcend through anything that is mortal;_

_But what you and I feel is utterly unchangeable,_

_So, maybe, eternal doesn’t seem so miserable_.

* * *

 The morning sun bathed the open ground of the Institute’s courtyard. Both of them were standing in the middle of the area. They wore black, sleeveless shirt and both of their _Virtutis_ runes were exposed. Standing at the edge of the courtyard were Magnus, Isabelle and Clary, looking nervous and anxious. Aside of five of them, the area was deserted. Jace stood behind Alec - on the left side - like he was supposed to in Alec’s visions; the _Virtutis_ rune itched at his palm.

After Edward had left the Institute yesterday, Jace and Alec had decided that they wanted to try activate the rune tomorrow. The idea of using the rune outside the vision excited both of the Shadowhunters. Jace wanted to see how the ascension to become an Angel would look. While Alec still scoffed at the thought him becoming an Angel, Jace could see curiosity burned in those hazel eyes. Alec wanted to know as well. When they told Magnus about their plan, Magnus simply nodded his head and asked at what time he should be there.

Magnus had no words of protest because the warlock knew that whether the _parabatai_ pair tried it tomorrow or later, Alec was only going to get worse and not better. Even now, the bright morning sunlight accentuated Alec’s increasingly pale and sunken face, reminding Magnus how rapidly Alec was deteriorating. Plus, who knew? Maybe the rune could miraculously help Alec and how was that not a good thing? So, here he was, standing at the side of the courtyard, anxiously waiting for this experiment to start. His magic might not be able to help Alec, but he hoped his presence would reassure Alec and Jace in any possible way.

“Ready?” Jace asked Alec.

Alec glanced back at his _parabatai_. “Yes,” Alec let out a long nervous breath. He didn't know what to expect from this. “Let’s do this.”

“Let us see you bathe in angelic light,” Jace joked, shattering the tension. “Maybe you’ll grow a pair of wings.” Magnus snorted in amusement while Isabelle and Clary laughed softly.

“Hilarious.” Alec said in a deadpan tone. But a slight twitch at the corner of his mouth was all the assurance that Jace needed. Just like that the tense atmosphere was diffuse.

“Alright, here goes nothing.” Jace took a deep breath. He raised his hand and placed it on Alec’s own identical rune on his left shoulder like he had done a dozen of times before when the visions assaulted his _parabatai_. Underneath his palm, he could feel Alec’s muscles shifted in anticipation. He closed his eyes, calling out his angelic blood to activate his _Strength_ and _Stamina_ runes without stele. The runes glowed gold as they came alive and then, bracing himself, Jace activated the Angel’s rune under his palm and felt Alec’s own rune wake up and burn.

The effect was immediate. Alec’s eyes snapped open; he choked back a surprise cry at the unfamiliar energy that flowed through him - so unlike the one he received during one of his visions. When he was receiving the vision, the energy that Jace gave to him was fed to the vision, extending his life. But now, without the pain from visions to distract him, Alec could now feel so clearly the way Jace was feeding his own _self_ into Alec directly. He felt how Jace was merging his energy, strength and stamina into Alec. Jace’s life-energy slotted into Alec with a distinctive snap that Alec was helpless to do anything but to cry loudly in sudden surprise. It didn’t feel painful but Alec could feel such raw, flaring power _inflamed_ his body.

Magnus, Isabelle and Clary watched the transformation in such awe. A bright gold light began to encompass both the Shadowhunters as all of Alec’s runes - all that he had ever drawn on himself - glowed simultaneously, making Alec look so ethereal and unreal. They could feel heavy, deep and smothering angelic energy emitted from the pair - such raw and unbridled power. From where they stand, they could see that Jace’s grip on Alec’s shoulder was ironclad and the ground surrounding them cracked and began to burn with orange-tinted scorched mark.

“Oh my God!” Clary gasped as the earth began to tremble. Isabelle reached out to hold Clary’s hand, bracing themselves against the waves of immense power.

Magnus’s eyes were wide in amazement. He could see Alec’s wide eyes were beginning to tinge with blue among the hazel. Alec was transforming to something else - something unearthly and transcending. Unexpectedly, the magic within Magnus’s blood came alive, reacting so favourably towards the immense angelic energy as it swept through the area. It was as if Magnus’s magic was trying to reach back to the _Parabatai_ pair… to do what, Magnus didn’t know. He had never felt his magic reacting this way before because his magic had always been his own. And he had never seen anything so… awe-inspiring and more astonishing than the sight of Jace and Alec came together like this. This sight and feeling would never fade from his memory in many, many years that would come.   

Alec felt the power began accumulating in his left hand and from what he could see, it was glowed with bright gold energy - just like the one he had seen in his vision. The energy was increasing all by itself and Alec had no idea how to contain or to control the power. In a few moments, he started to feel the energy within him becoming unbearable. The angelic energy built and built and built to the point that Alec felt severely unbalanced and untethered. Jace’s life-energy that was embedded within him felt tilted to the right and it spewing out uncontrollably.

Something that felt so amazing a few seconds ago began to feel so wrong.

The pulsing energy was too much, too uneven and too unbalanced.

Alec felt so unhinged.

“Jace!” Alec cried. He instinctively knew that in a few minutes, he was going to level the whole Institute if they didn’t stop this. He couldn’t control the power. They were reckless to try this so close to the human population. “JACE! We need to STOP THIS!” Alec shouted again.

Magnus’s expression morphed from awestruck into horror as blood began to flow out of both Jace and Alec’s noses. Their faces were strained against the rising power, building towards a dangerous crescendo. Something was definitely wrong!

Clary gasped while Isabelle shouted at her brothers. “What is happening?! Jace! Alec!”

“Damn it!” Jace cursed. He felt his energy spiralling out of control; was he was feeding too much or was Alec was taking too much?  He couldn’t tell. His _parabatai_ rune burned as their tethered life-energy that had previously slotted so perfectly into each other, began to writhe and stutter. Commanding the _Virtutis_ rune to stop functioning and staving off the rushing energy were as difficult as stopping the rushing waterfall from flowing. Both Alec and Jace were helpless in the face of this onslaught. “ALEC! I can’t stop this!” Jace shouted, gritting his teeth. “I don’t know how!”

Magnus stepped forward to the _Parabatai_ pair, wanting to help them. But the bright, gold light that was emitted from the pair created a barrier-like energy that prevented Magnus and the two other Shadowhunters from coming close. “Pull away, Jace!” Magnus shouted. “Release your hand!”

“Magnus!” Jace glanced back at Magnus, panic was etched on his face so clearly. “I can’t! The energy is too strong!”

Alec looked down at his left hand in growing horror. The golden energy that was accumulating in his hand was getting bigger and more powerful. He tried to pull back the energy but he didn’t how. He felt inadequate and incredibly lacking in front of this tsunami of power that instead of him commanding the power, the power was pulling him towards somewhere Alec didn't want to go. They were seriously running out time and they needed to find a way to stop this before they ended up killing all of the Shadowhunters that were currently residing in the Institute. “We need to hurry!” Alec raised his left hand warningly to all of them. “I don’t think I can hold this in any longer!!!”

Blood from Alec and Jace’s noses trickled down continuously, drenching their black shirts - but apparently the effect was worse on Alec, since he was the recipient of such power. Apparently, the Institute was not the only thing that they need to save right now, Magnus thought grimly. But what should he do? He couldn’t come near to them, not without killing himself in the process.

Suddenly, Magnus recalled earlier on how his magic was reacting to the angelic power. How the angelic power strangely called out to his magic and how his magic was practically singing back at it. But that was impossible, Magnus thought, because for weeks he couldn’t do anything to help Alec. How could his demonic magic be compatible to the angelic energy now? What changed?

It was the _Virtutis_ rune, Magnus realised with a jolt. The _Virtutis_ rune was activated. Before, there was no rune and his magic gave no impact whatsoever to Alec. But now, with the rune activated outside the vision, something within Magnus began to react. His magic was pulled towards the power. Could it be? Could Magnus help Alec?

Magnus took a deep breath, making a split decision. “Isabelle!” He called, waiting for Isabelle to turn to Magnus. Then he said, “I’m going to try something but if anything goes wrong, I need you to go Alec and save him first.”

“What?!” Isabelle cried. “What are you talking about?”

Magnus rolled back the sleeves of his shirt, readying himself. “I’m going to use my magic to try and separate Jace from Alec. But I need to focus my magic towards Alec because the angelic power is concentrated on him. He is the pivot of all this,” Magnus looked at Isabelle hard, willing for the girl to understand him. “It shouldn’t hurt him, I think… But in case it does and everything goes to hell, or if the magic is bounced back to me, you priority should be on Alec. Not me.”

“You need to save him first.” Magnus said unyieldingly.

“You can’t ask me that,” Isabelle said in mortification. “Magnus, if anything happens to you, Alec would be devastated. He will never forgive me.”

Magnus’s heart stuttered at Isabelle’s words before shaking his head in dismissal. “He’ll get over it.” Magnus said firmly before turning back to the _Parabatai_ pair and walked towards them as close as he dared. “Ready?”

“No!” Isabelle retorted.

Ignoring Isabelle, Magnus raised his arms and gathered a sizable, deep-red energy in both of his hands. He pulled his hands back slightly before thrusting them towards the men.

“Magnus! No!” Isabelle screamed futilely as the magic shot out from Magnus’s hands and hit Alec’s head-on.

Several things happened at the same time. As the magic hit Alec, Magnus closed his eyes, bracing himself against any repelling magic. The magic crackled and electrified around the energy barrier surrounding Alec and Jace before it was merged into the _Parabatai_ pair. The external addition of the magical power caused Jace and Alec to feel a sudden shift in their previously unbalanced and untethered energy. Whereas before the energy felt tilted to the left, now the it felt momentarily even and balanced and in that split second, the uncontrollable angelic energy suddenly felt centred and controllable. So, Jace took the miniscule window of opportunity to rip his hand away from Alec’s shoulder and deactivated all of his angel’s marks. And without Jace feeding him, Alec felt the immense angelic power on his right hand began to be reabsorbed back into him.

In under a minute, the chaotic event turned eerily calm. The shaking ground suddenly stayed still and the shouting voices of Isabelle and Clary stopped. In the middle of the courtyard stood Magnus, frozen with disbelief that his attempt actually worked. After all those weeks praying that he could provide any kind of assistance towards Alec, the Heaven granted him this.

Alec and Jace crumpled down on the ground as their legs could no longer support them, shakily wiping off blood from their noses - exhaustion so clear in their faces but oh, so relief that they didn’t destroy the Institute compound. Between the two of them, Alec seemed to bear the most side-effect from the transformation with his breaths shortened and his body trembled in shock. It was clear that his body was not equipped to receive such a huge power.

The sights of blood being wiped shook Magnus from his trance as he rushed towards Alec, fearing that the magic that he had thrown at Alec had hurt the man. Behind him, he heard Isabelle calling her brothers as she ran toward the debilitating men.

“Alexander!” Magnus knelt in front of Alec, hands were raised up to cradle the tall Nephilim’s face. He urged Alec to look at him and the dazed hazel eyes obeyed. The blue tinge that he saw earlier in Alec’s eyes when he was transforming was gone. Magnus bit his lips in misery as he wiped the residual blood from Alec’s cheeks and lips. “Are you okay? Are you alright?” He demanded; his heart raced a hundred miles per hour. “You’re not hurt, are you? Did I hurt you?!”

Alec raised his trembling hands to grasp at Magnus’s shoulders. Words were stuck at his throat from sheer exhaustion and sheer relief that all that Alec could do was shaking his head. Magnus groaned, finally appeased that his magic didn’t hurt Alec, before pulling the man towards him into a hug. “You reckless Nephilim! Don’t ever do that again!”

Alec let his face be buried in the curve of Magnus’s neck as he slid his arms around the warlock, returning the embrace. The words of gratitude were not spoken but Magnus could feel it in the way Alec tightened his arms. Magnus squeezed back in return, acknowledging the silent thank you.

Beside them were Isabelle and Jace. Magnus watched Isabelle fuss over Jace as she was wiping away blood on his face.  She waited until Jace regained his composure before starting her fretting. “What was all that about? Why couldn’t you control the rune?”

Alec pulled slightly away from Magnus to look at Jace. Jace returned Alec’s inquisitive stare, reassuring his _parabatai_ that he was okay, everyone was okay and no one was on the verge of dying today. _Oh, come on_ , Jace thought in exasperation, Alec needed to start worrying about himself a little bit more since he was the one who looked like he was on the verge of losing his consciousness.

“I don’t know, Izzy. The power felt too consuming and- and too much,” Jace confessed. “It also felt… I don’t know… It felt skewed and- and not balanced at all. Did you feel that way too, Alec?”

“Yes,” Alec said in raspy voice. “I can’t stop the power from building up. And it built so quickly and so uncontrollably - I don’t think I am equipped for this. I felt the Angelic power requires more than just me; like I'm not enough. This is a very dangerous power. If the Clave knew we have this in our capacity, I don’t think they would be very pleased.”

“By the way, Magnus,” Isabelle said, slapping hard at the warlock’s shoulder and Magnus grunted as he rubbed the sore spot. “Don’t do that to me ever again!”

“Do what?” Alec asked, alarmed.

“It’s nothing, Alexander. Isabelle is telling me that I am being selfish and I agree with her,” Magnus said as he looked at Isabelle’s pale face. It was unfair of him to ask Isabelle to choose.  “I’m sorry, Isabelle.”

Isabelle nodded her head, accepting Magnus’s apology graciously.

“What happened just now?” Jace asked. “Why did Magnus’s magic work in separating us?”

“I don’t know what happened, but when the rune is activated just now, the magic in me is reacting in such a strange way. It’s the first time I felt like it.” Magnus answered.

“What do you mean… strange?” Isabelle asked.

“Demonic magic has never been compatible with angelic power before. That was why warlock or any other Downworlders couldn’t use the angel’s runes. The demon blood caused us to react so adversely against the angelic power - it hurt us. But, there is something different about this rune because I could feel my magic reaching out to both of you. It has never happened before for as long as I remember. So, that’s why I thought maybe if I gave in to my instinct, I could do something to stop it.”

“By the word something, you mean attacking us with big ball of magic?” Jace said sardonically.

“It worked, didn’t it?” Magnus shrugged. “To be honest, I thought the magic was going to be reflected back to me. You guys were surrounded by some sort of energy barrier.”  

Jace huffed before realising Clary was not among them. Jace looked around and saw Clary stand a few feet away from them, frozen and unmoving. “Clary?” Jace called as he stood up as quickly as his trembling legs allowed him. At that, all three sets of head turned to look at Clary in synchronised concern. Clary looked shell-shocked. Something had happened while they were discussing.

Jace closed in to the redhead. “Hey, hey… Clary? It’s okay, we’re all okay,” Jace said softly.

Clary tried to smile but it was wobbly. “Jace…”

Jace frowned. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

Clary’s eyes fell on Magnus. Swallowing hard, she said to Jace, “We all need to talk.”

* * * * * *

When Lydia Branwell took over the New York Institute as the Acting Head of Institute, the first thing that Alec offered her was his Head of Institute office. She was reluctant even though Alec had insisted. She argued that she was only here temporarily and that Alec would get better and reassume his position. Alec had felt guilty for taking the room that was rightfully Lydia but eventually he agreed. Alec had a long list of people that he should be grateful in his life and Lydia would always be amongst the top ten.

They all had agreed to reconvene at Alec’s Head of Institute office room after an hour to clean themselves up and a little bit of resting. By the look at Alec and Jace’s exhausted faces, they could really use the temporary break. They split up with Clary followed Jace back to his room, Isabelle headed back to her lab - presumably to write the progress of their experiment and Alec walked towards to his own room.

As he stepped inside his room with Magnus closed behind him, he marched straight to his bed, plopping face down with a long, tired groan. Magnus sighed at the way Alec lay down, with shoes were still on his feet and blood-stain shirt unremoved. But he couldn’t blame him. Every inch of Alec’ body was lined with fatigue.

He knew that he couldn’t make himself portal to his own loft and leave Alec all alone in this room. Not like this. Not when all that he ever wanted to undress Alec and help him clean up. Then, he wanted to feed him and heal him until the unhealthy, pale hue was removed from Alec’s face. Most of all, Magnus wanted to climb the bed and pulled Alec so, so close to him until they couldn’t tell whose limbs were tangled into the other’s limbs. If Magnus had his way, he wanted to tangle even his soul to this man’s soul, so he would always be able to follow Alec everywhere in every lifetime.

The line between friendship and lover was getting blurred as the time went by. Helping Alec getting through this ordeal made it difficult for Magnus to differentiate which action was friendly and which action was not. Did a person fuss over his friend to this extent? Did a person feel this strong to his friend? He knew how much he love Alec but at the same time, he didn’t want to drive Alec away with his emotions. Magnus had always felt too strong and too much for an immortal. His heart was the bane to his long and endless life.

But the sight of helpless Alec on the bed caused Magnus to throw away any precaution to the wind. _Oh, what the hell…_ Magnus thought determinedly before asking, “Do you need any help in cleaning yourself, Alexander? I know you prefer a real shower rather than a magic cleaning and I can help you with that, if you want to.”

Alec was too tired to even care. “I don’t think I can get up... Can you magic my clothes away…?” He mumbled into the pillow from behind closed eyes. He felt like he could sleep forever.

Magnus tried to hide his alarm at Alec’s willingness to admit his weakness. This morning rune testing activity proved to be too taxing on Alec’s already weakened state. Magnus didn’t want to fuss anymore - he didn’t think any of them could take it - instead, he indulged Alec’s request and within seconds, Alec’s sleeveless shirt was replace with his usual loose, black long-sleeved sweater. Magnus also magicked away Alec’s shoes, any blood stain on his skin and even rearranging the blanket and pillows so the Shadowhunter would be more comfortable.

“Thank you, Magnus…” Alec whispered as he turned his body over to face the warlock as he curled even more comfortably on the bed. “You’ve no idea how grateful I am for sticking with me all the way.”

Magnus smiled softly. He pulled a chair closer to Alec and sat on it. Reaching out to card his fingers through the dark hair, Magnus joked, “What else am I supposed to do? Sit at home and count my inventory?”

Alec’s generous lips stretched into a tired grin and his eyelids were half-closed. He unconsciously leaned into Magnus’s touch, sighing softly. “Well, you do seem like you’re always running out of things.”

Now that it was clear Alec was very much welcoming his touches, Magnus’s hands slid down from Alec’s hair to caress his face and the dark circle under those luminous eyes. His heart squeezed and his throat tightened at the sound of Alec’s contented sighs at his touch and at the way Alec looked so peaceful in his presence. Wasn’t Magnus’s presence supposed to remind Alec of his hurt and fear? If Alec no longer fear him, did that mean Magnus finally had the chance to try again?

Oh God… how he wanted that. He missed Alec so much; it couldn’t be measured. How could someone be so close to him and yet, still felt so far away and out of reach?

“Darling, I wish I could do more,” Magnus whispered, matching Alec’s low tone.

“Magnus,” Alec said softly, eyes were now fully closed. He rubbed his cheeks subtly against Magnus’s touch. “I’m just so glad you’re here.” And then, Alec lost his fight as he slipped into deep slumber.

Magnus couldn’t help himself as he buried his face into his hands, hiding the tears still were still managed to escape from his closed eyes. This sorrow had been building up within him for weeks and now the feelings of fear, anger and helplessness had finally crashed through him. It felt like he had been trying to run after Alec as fast as he could, and yet Alec was still slipping away from him for far more quickly than he could catch up. This torturous ability of seeing the future was getting too much that Magnus didn’t even think that the _Virtutis_ rune was enough.

Alec was still dying and Magnus’s heart was still breaking piece by piece until there would be nothing left.

Magnus didn’t even want to entertain the thought that he would have to soon learn to live without Alec. The last 400 years before meeting Alec, his life was grey. He thought he knew what love felt like. He thought he knew how losing the people he loved felt like. He thought he had mastered the act of moving on as he collected all of his previous lovers’ mementos, reminiscing the good times. But by all the goods in this world, Magnus didn’t think he would survive the heartache of losing Alec to death. Somehow, he knew that no matter how many mementos of Alec he would keep, he couldn’t survive it. Those two months of being apart were hellish enough and Alec was still alive and he still had the chance to make it right. But losing Alec to the place where Magnus couldn’t follow?

_He couldn’t._

If only he knew a way to bind himself to Alec; if only he knew a way to cast away his immortality so that he would have the chance to grow old with Alec, Magnus knew he would do it in a heartbeat; in a second without any hesitation. The mortals didn’t know how lucky they were. Not everybody was given the privilege of growing old with the ones they loved.

For the next hour, Magnus sat next to Alec, holding the hand of the love of his life so tightly. The fear of losing Alec would always be in him, no matter how much or little time they had. Even if they had a thousand years in front of him, it still would not be enough.

He sat in vigil, unaware of the passing of time as he was so lost in his thought. So when he heard a soft knock on Alec’s door an hour later, he was visibly startled.

“Isabelle,” Magnus greeted when he opened the door.

Isabelle was slightly surprise to see Magnus. “You’re here the whole time?”

“Yes,” Magnus said. “Alec couldn’t manage and I don’t want to leave him alone.”

“Oh…” Isabelle’s visage turned dark with sadness. “Is he sleeping?”

Magnus nodded before allowing Isabelle in. When both of them turned to Alec, they were surprise to see a pair of hazel eyes staring back them. “Hey, Izzy.” Alec said, his voice was husky from sleeping.

“Alec! Magnus said you’re sleeping. Did we wake you up?”

Alec yawned as he swung his legs off his bed. “It’s okay. I need to wake up anyway. I’ve been sleeping too much lately.” With that, he stood up and walked towards his bathroom slowly.

Isabelle bit her lips and she looked at her frail brother. She took a few deep, calming breaths before smiling brightly at Magnus. “Shall we leave Alec to his affairs? Walk with me to Alec’s office.”

Magnus looked at the closed bathroom door instead, hesitating.

“Come on, Magnus. He’ll be alright.” Isabelle said as she pulled the warlock out of the room.

* * * * * *

“Tell us what happened, Clary,” Jace said.

Clary stood with her arms wrapped around herself. She had spent an hour rehearsing her talk, knowing fully well how it would affect her friends. Taking a deep breath, Clary said, “Back then, when we saw Magnus had succeeded in bringing balance to you and Alec’s _Virtutis_ power, I heard the voice of Angel _Ithuriel_.” The response was immediate as all of her friends started to talk simultaneously.  Clary hastily added, “Wait… I don’t think you all are going to like what I’m about to say.”

“What do you mean?” Isabelle asked. “Did he say anything about Alec?”

“Yeah, like how sorry they are for putting Alec up to this?” Jace said indignantly on behalf of Alec.

“Jace, come on,” Clary said pleadingly. “Angel _Ithuriel_ told me that the angels didn’t expect the visions would affect Alec to this extent and the _Virtutis_ rune to be like this - this powerful.”

“How can the angels not know?” Magnus asked in disbelief. “It’s their rune!”

Clary answered, “Unlike the last _parabatai_ pair, who had this rune, this time around Jace’s blood consists of pure angel’s blood that he obtained in such an abnormal way. So, basically Jace is more than an ordinary Shadowhunter and so, when he gives his life-energy to Alec, the _Virtutis_ rune’s power becomes twice-fold – much stronger than usual. This causes the _Virtutis_ rune to become too strong for Alec to control. _‘The power of the Dantis is more than what the Receptorem is equipped to bear’_ \- those were his words.”

Her audience fell silent at the revelation, so Clary took the chance to continue and her words began to tumble down non-stop. “So, when the Angels found out about that, Angel _Ithuriel_ showed me a new rune that is to be used together with the _Virtutis_ rune. The rune is also to be placed on two persons. But instead of sharing energy and strength like the way the _Virtutis_ rune allowed the bearers to do, this rune…” Clary swallowed hard. “This rune tethers the bearers’ souls to each other. It seems Alec and Jace’s _Virtutis_ rune is too strong for just one Shadowhunter soul to bear. Alec needs someone’s help to control and to buffer the Angelic power. And this rune will enable Alec to do that by allowing him to share his soul with another bearer, so he could control the Angel rune like he is supposed to.”

“Okay,” Alec said slowly. “You meant to say that as Jace feeds me with his energy when the _Virtutis_ rune activated, I would need another Shadowhunter to tether his soul to mine at that exact moment, just so I can control the power better, right?”

 _If only it was that easy_ , Clary thought ruefully. “It is not just about the power, Alec. You need to understand, in that moment, you are an Angel in a mortal body. You and Jace are supposed to be enough to bear the power that is released from your _Virtutis_ rune. But now it is too much and it is not meant to be controlled by a mere mortal. So, you would need someone… more than…” Clary halted, reluctant to continue.

“More than what, Clary?” Alec frowned.

Clary hesitated for a few second before she said, “More than another mortal to bind your soul to. Another Shadowhunter will not be enough.”

Alec slowly stood up, confusion clearly on his face. “It must be another Shadowhunter! We’re talking about an angelic rune. Shadowhunters are all mortal. I- I don’t understand.”

“Alec… remember when I said that the angels chose you to receive this ability for a specific reason? Why wasn’t I or Jace who received this - why it has to be you? Well, I think that the Angels kind of expected this would happen, somehow, - that the _Virtutis_ rune would be too much for you bear because of how Jace is, but until they see it for real, they are reluctant to reveal this rune.” Clary sighed.

“This rune will allow you to tether your soul to another _immortal_ , which means this rune can be drawn on a Downworlder.”

The room was as silent as death. Clary’s announcement was a surprise that none of them had ever expected - not for as long as they live. Because who had ever heard an angelic rune could be placed on the demon-blooded Downworlders?

Magnus’s eyes were wide in utter, utter surprise. “What do you mean?” He said slowly.

Clary looked at Magnus; her smile was tremulous. “The Angels created it so that the magical essence of a Downworlder can be used with the power of an Angel. But it can’t be just any Downworlder; the Angel’s power must call out to a specific Downworlder’s magic - to show that they are compatible. And since Magnus said that he felt his magic drawn to Alec and Jace, then, I supposed the rune was created for Magnus. Unless Alec has another compatible candidate that is willing to tether his immortal soul to our mortal soul, I guess the Angels means you.”

Magnus could scarcely believe his ears. He felt his feet were being swept off the ground, he felt breathless and unhinged and all of this sounded was so unreal. Was it not an hour ago he prayed that his magic could help Alec? Was it not an hour ago that he prayed that he could somehow bind his soul to Alec? And to have his prayers answered so quickly was something Magnus hadn’t experienced in his long, long life.

Whatever good had he done to deserve this gift?

“Wait,” Alec said suddenly, raising his hand. “There must be a catch.”

Clary’s eyes were glossy and she nodded her head. This was the part that she dreaded. “You guys need to know that once the rune is drawn, your souls are bound permanently and it will allow both of your lives to be connected to each other whether _Virtutis_ rune is activated not,” Clary said softly. “But at the same, _Amoris et anima vinctum_ rune works in tandem with _Virtutis_ rune. It means, when the _Virtutis_ rune is inactive, the _Anima_ rune is dormant - the bearers’ souls are simply tethered - but the second Jace and Alec use their _Virtutis_ rune, Magnus and Alec’s _Anima_ rune will be activated as well to support the inflow of Jace’s strength and life-energy and during that time…”

Clary took a deep breath. “...During that time, Alec will take Magnus’s life to support his. The more Jace and Alec use their rune, the more lifespan will be taken from Magnus. - That is why an immortal is needed because of their life longevity. ”

Jace and Isabelle gasped at the implication of that rune while the blood drained rapidly from Alec’s face, making him look like a ghost. He staggered a step back, shaking his head in denial. The thought that he was hurting or even worse, killing Magnus - _his_ _Magnus_ ; his vivacious, lively, centuries-year old Magnus - was so sickening and grotesque and unacceptable. This price is too big and Alec was not willing to pay for it. Not even at the expense of the world’s survival.

“No… no, I won’t do it…” Alec said as he tried to breathe in air into his constricted lungs.

Magnus was stunned at the revelation. He should have been mortified. He should have been angry at the Angels’ presumption that he would be willing to do this. But what was playing in his mind now _was not_ how his life would be used to lengthen Alec’s life. In his mind, he was so damned elated that finally, _FINALLY_ he could help Alec to see this ordeal through. Did he care about his own immortal life? No, not really. Not when his endless life could finally be used to help the person that mattered to him the most. How apt the name of the rune was - _love and soul bound_ \- because that was what Magnus desired the most; to bound himself to Alec in every possible way.

By the Heavens, it would mean Magnus probably would never be left behind and be alone ever again. That thought brought tears of happiness in his eyes.

Magnus was so elated that he didn’t realise Alec’s reaction. He didn’t realise the horror on Alec’s face. He didn’t realise Alec had turned around and left the room in such abrupt manner. When the sound of a door being slammed snapped him out of his happiness stupor, Magnus turned to look at Alec but found that he was too late.

“Alexander!” Magnus called urgently, fully intend to follow the tall Shadowhunter, before Clary grasped his arm and turned him towards her. “Biscuit, what? I need…”

“You need to listen to the rest of this.” Clary insisted. “It’s you who would be affected the most, Magnus.”

“But, I-” Magnus didn’t care what else was in store for him. What more could the Angels want from him that he wasn’t willing to give? He wanted to go after Alec.

“Please…” Clary implored. Magnus looked at Clary, then to Isabelle and lastly to Jace. All three of them wore the same mixture of sadness/anxious expression. “You can go Alec once you have all the needed facts and once you have thought this through.”

“Yes, Magnus,” Isabelle said. “He is not going anywhere. Not after what happened the last time he did.”

He wanted so much to go to Alec but the rational side of him agreed with Clary. He needed all the facts. So, Magnus let out a long breath and nodded his head. “When you said that my soul is tethered to Alec’s, how does that work? Does that mean if Alec dies, I will die too and vice-versa?” Magnus asked.

Clary twisted her fingers nervously. “No, no... It doesn’t work like that. Remember when I said that _Anima_ rune works in tandem with _Virtutis_ rune? Your lifespan will only be affected when Alec uses _Virtutis_ rune outside the vision. When the _Virtutis_ is used for the purpose of transforming Alec into an angel, that is when your lifespan will be drained. The more Alec takes from you, the more of your lifespan will be shortened to the point that you maybe eventually be stripped off your immortality. Or you may not, we're not sure. Even if Alec dies, you would go on living, but the _Anima_ rune will still be there and it will not fade away like any other Angelic runes.”

“I’m not sure I’m following you, Biscuit. What do you mean by the rune will still be there?”

Clary answered, “You see, the Angels are not sure of the final outcome of this rune because there is no history where a Downworlder bears an angelic rune, especially a rune as strong as this. Will this rune cause you to share Alec’s mortality? Or will Alec share your immortality? Or will Alec’s life just be extended far longer than a simple Shadowhunter? If any of the scenarios happens, then, what will happen to Alec and Jace’s _Parabatai_ and _Virtutis_ rune? Will Jace be affected at all? These are the questions that the Angels have no answer to and only time and future actions will determine the outcome.”

“Furthermore, the _Anima_ rune is not just a permanent rune, it is also an _eternal_ rune, which means it cannot be broken even through death - unlike the _Parabatai_ rune. So, if Alec dies or if you die, one of you will keep on living until your time is up and your souls will be reunited no matter how long it will be because this tether that binds the two souls is the strongest angelic power that the Angels had ever bestowed upon human. But will that change the nature of Alec’s mortality or your immortality, the Angels are simply unsure.”

Clary raised her hands to grasp Magnus’s biceps. She looked up at the tall warlock, “What I am trying to say is that, if Alec takes too much of your lifespan when he uses his _Virtutis_ rune for any reason at all, you could lose your immortality. And even if Alec is able to control his power and you retain your immortality, Magnus, you will be tethered to Alec _forever._ No death, no life and no amount of de-runing can undo this. Do you even want that?”

Magnus was rendered speechless.

Clary took that a sign that maybe Magnus would back off a little and would spend some time to just think. “The Angels chose Alec for this ability because of _you_ , Magnus. You are what Alec has that not me or Jace or Izzy has. Aside from having the _parabatai_ rune, Alec has a very powerful warlock who loves him to the extent that he may be willing to do this because this rune will affect the bearers in the most incomprehensible way. But, Magnus…”

Clary smiled softly, encouragingly. “But Magnus, it is still your choice. You don’t have to sacrifice yourself to show to Alec or to us that you love him. We know. Even if you decided that this rune would be too much for you, it’s okay. We can try to find something else. There’s always another way, another option to every problem.”

Jace swallowed hard, thinking how much he wanted Alec to be saved but at the same time, he never wanted Magnus to be the prize of that salvation. Besides, he knew that Alec would never forgive him if he persuaded Magnus to accept this. So, Jace put his hand on Magnus’s shoulder and squeezed it tight. Magnus looked towards Jace. “Clary’s right. Your life is your own. I don’t want you to feel like you’re obligated to do this. You are our friend - our _family_. There is no way I would be willing to see you get hurt.”

Isabelle took Magnus’s hand and grip it tightly. She smiled with that sad smile of her; it made her looked soft and beautiful. “Magnus, our relationship is not conditional on you agreeing to this. We will still love you anyway.”

Magnus couldn’t believe those words came out of Jace and Isabelle’s mouth. It showed how far they had come - from a hostility between Shadowhunter and Downworlder to a friendship that cared for each other’s well-being. If two years ago someone told him that he would risk his life and career for a group of Shadowhunters, Magnus would have called him crazy.

“But you did it anyway, Jace,” Magnus pointed out. “You allowed _Virtutis_ rune to be placed on you without even knowing the effects.”

“I am his _parabatai_ …” Jace said as if it should explain everything. There was no place he wouldn’t go for his other soul.

“And I am his lover,” Magnus countered. “Or was… Did you think I would do anything less than what you’re willing to do?”

Magnus had spent hundreds of years looking for this. He had spent years looking for a family on his own. A family that would support him; that would accept him as he was. He had expected it would probably come from Isabelle or Clary. But for him to find it in Jace as well? To find Jace prioritise his well-being over everything else, including his _parabatai_? Magnus didn’t expect that but oh, how he welcomed it.

And really, why did they think that Magnus would back away from this? Didn’t they know how deep his love and his need for Alec? Didn’t they know that there was no task too daunting, no request too much and there was nothing that Magnus wouldn’t do for Alec? Didn’t they know that even if there was no _Anima_ rune to bind them, Magnus was already bound to Alec; immortality be damned. Alec resurrected his dead heart with just a glance and just like that, Magnus was forever-ly Alec’s and Alec was his.

Did they think that the knowledge that he might lose his immortality would scare him away?

It made Magnus want to laugh out loud at the utter absurdity of it. An hour ago, Magnus was terrified of the prospect that he would need to learn to live without Alec for endless years to come. Now, the Angels were giving him the opportunity - the beyond-his-wildest-imagination opportunity - to be with Alec. In this life, in the coming death, in the coming life beyond death.

That was not a trial - that was an honest-to-god gift.

One that Magnus didn’t think he deserved but one that he would gladly accept without any hesitation.

“But you’re not a Shadowhunter, Magnus,” Isabelle said gently. “If you want, you can back away from this and no one would think less of you. So, please, take your time and think.”

“Are you kidding me?” Magnus said - his voice sounded hoarse as his chest was full with unmeasured happiness. “I don’t need more time to think about this. I have thought about this ever since I fell in love with Alexander and contemplating ways to always be with him. This…” Magnus gestured around him vaguely. “This is the unexpected gift from the Angels.”

With his eyes glossy with unshed tears, Magnus pulled Isabelle in a big embrace of gratitude. “This is the gift that tells me that Alexander will always be with me. This is the gift that ensures me that I will be never alone.”

Isabelle laughed through her tears and relief, returning Magnus’s embrace in equal vigour. “You would need to convince Alec first!”

“Oh, Isabelle.” Magnus smiled. “Since when Alec could ever refuse my persuasion?”

* * * * * *

 


	9. If you walk through the storm and come out stronger, this relationship is meant to last

 

 

* * *

  
  _How much are you willing to sacrifice?,_

_For the one that you claim you love;_

_Do you think that what you’ve given so far is suffice,_

_Or are you willing to give more when push comes to shove?_

 

 

_Know this to be an absolute truth,_

_That it is not a sacrifice if one is willing to give;_

_No matter what is demanded from you,_

_You’ll gladly give it considering the alternative._

* * *

If Alec had his way, he wanted to run as far as possible from the Institute, from this unwanted burden bestowed upon him and from the choice that the Angels gave him. Because it was an irrational choice: either to sacrifice his own life and at the same time, letting the whole world go to hell or to sacrifice _Magnus’s_ life. If it was just his life, Alec simply wouldn’t care because it was never, ever, a contest between his own fleeting life and Magnus’s - he would always choose Magnus over his. But the fate of the world was on his shoulders, requiring him to step up and stop that creature from ever escaping.

How could the Angels do this to him? His own life was not enough that they needed to take Magnus’s life as well? How could he live with himself, knowing that he would be deliberately hurting Magnus - the man who had taught him, cared for him and showed him so much?

This fact was stifling him, suffocating him to point that he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t make this choice. He couldn’t choose the survival of the world over the the survival of Magnus.

Oh, how he wished he could simply run away. He wished he could simply leave the Institute and perhaps, never coming back. Maybe if he ran fast enough and far enough, Alec would simply disappear and then the Angels would choose someone else who was more capable and stronger than him. Someone who was more worthy than him. Surely, there were other _Parabatai_ pairs that were able to bear this burden.

But, then, Alec remembered the way Magnus and Jace were angry at him for disappearing on them on the day he decided to take a walk alone. By the Heavens, Alec didn’t want to put that fear/anger expression on the two people that meant the world to him anymore.

So, Alec retreated to the only sanctuary he had ever known - now that he was no longer entitled to be in Magnus’s loft - in hope he could clear his head. He entered his own room, locking the door behind him before leaning against the door. Now that he was finally alone, the mask of bravado was shed away. The revelation of the rune had shocked him, scared him and angered him. The emotional rollercoaster came to a temporary halt when he entered into his room and it left him trembling in utter, utter exhaustion.   

 _I am so damned tired_ , Alec thought as he slid down the door with his knees were brought close to his chest. Every inch of his body was shaking with endless fatigue that he wondered when would he ever _not_ be tired or in pain.

His eyes were wide, looking into nothingness and his body remained frozen in this indecisive limbo that the Angels had buried him. He stayed that way for the longest time, allowing himself to be numb and void from any thinking.  

“Darling…” A soft voice suddenly floated through the door, sounded so close.  

Alec was startled from his trance at that familiar, unmistakable deep voice. But he wasn’t ready to make any decision, so, Alec remained silent.

“Alexander, I know you’re on the other side. Please open this door,” Magnus tried again, his heart thundered in jubilation at the thought of Alec tethering his soul to him and in fear at the possibility of Alec rejecting him. When he still heard no reply from Alec, Magnus proceeded. “I don’t want to have this conversation with a door between us. So, either you open this door or I’ll break it down, I swear.”

“Please go away, Magnus,” Alec pleaded; his voice sounded thick with emotions. “What the Angels want - they have no right to ask it from you. We’ll find another way tomorrow, I promise. But right now, I just can’t... I- I need to be alone for today.” Because Alec couldn’t face Magnus, couldn’t see his kind and gentle visage and not crumble in front of the warlock. By the Angels, he loved him so much to point that the thought of using Magnus’s life made him want to throw up. How dare the Angels asked Magnus to do this.

_The whole world could go to hell for all Alec cared._

Magnus closed his eyes as he rested his forehead on the door; his heart was breaking at the sound of Alec’s distressed voice. How could he leave Alec now when the Shadowhunter sounded like _that_? Instead, he raised his hands slowly to place them flat on the wooden door. “Don’t you want to know what I think about this rune?”

Alec turned his head aside to press his temple on the door. Despite just telling Magnus that he didn’t want to talk, Alec still replied to Magnus’s question. “I know what you’re going to say, Magnus. You-” He let out a long, shuddering breath as sorrow constricted his chest. “You are the most generous and kind man I’ve ever known. You always put others’ needs and wants above yours. The Clave said that you’re greedy and hedonistic, but they don’t know how wrong they are about you. _I do_. And I also know that this time will be no different. You’re going to say that you’re willing to this because that is just how you are, Magnus.”

Tears fell from Alec’s eyes, down to his cheeks without him realising it. Alec never thought his heart could hurt this much. Even when Magnus broke up with him didn’t hurt this much. The fact that _he_ was burdening _Magnus,_  costing him his _life_ , was tearing Alec apart. “But _I_ don’t want you to do this. I don’t want you to do this because of me. I cannot live with myself knowing that I am the cause of your hurting. I just want you to continue living - long after I’ve gone, long after everyone I know has gone. I want you to be happy to live and to love in many, many years to come.”

Alec swallowed down the lump of sadness in his throat at the thought of Magnus loving others after him but couldn’t find within him to begrudge Magnus. After all, Alec had long accepted that when he was in the relationship with the immortal warlock, Magnus was never meant to be only his. The handful of time that was given to him had to be enough because he could never ask Magnus for more. He never knew how.

 _“_ The world shouldn’t be deprived of everything that you are because of me, Magnus.” Alec said softly.  

The words that Alec uttered stunned Magnus to the core. He never knew that Alec had put him on a pedestal that high. Oh, he knew that Alec loved him, never did once he doubt it, but to realise just _how deep_ Alec loved him to the point that he put Magnus’s happiness above his own caused tears to spring on his eyes. Magnus had always heard how the Nephilims only fell in love once in their life and when they fell in love, the fierceness and the absoluteness in their love were truly outstanding. Magnus never knew that because he had never even once been involved seriously in the Nephilims and Alec was his first. So, when he took the step into this relationship, Magnus didn’t think much about this particular Nephilims’ trait because Alec had been so beautiful, so damaged, so insecure and so, so lovable that Magnus couldn’t help but to pursue after him.

And to be loved so fiercely back by Alec was an experience that Magnus had never known.

His hands that were on the door curled into tight fists; frustrated beyond belief that he couldn’t see Alec’s face. He wanted to pull the self-sacrificing Nephilim close to him. He wanted to engulf Alec in his embrace and never, never let him go. He wanted to be the one Alec looked for protection. _Magnus wanted to bind his soul to Alec’s_ , why couldn’t Alec see that?

The feelings Alec invoked in him were indescribable and unfathomable. Magnus closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths to calm these raging emotions within him, before saying in quiet, warning tone. “I said I don’t want to have a conversation like this. Open this door, Alexander, or I swear that I will break this goddamn door down.”

Alec inhaled sharply at the Magnus’s dark tone. He scrambled on his feet, retreating a few steps away from the door as he wiped his tears hastily. He stared at the door hesitantly, internally debating whether to call Magnus’s bluff or not. Alec really, really didn’t want to let Magnus in, not when he felt so shattered, raw and exposed with his usual stoic mask undone. But at the same time, he didn’t think Magnus was bluffing.

“Alexander,” Magnus said warningly. “Ten seconds.”

“Magnus, please… I can’t-” Alec stuttered. “Tomorrow, please, I promise.”

“No!” Magnus retorted, the door shook slightly when the warlock slammed his fist at the door, causing Alec to startle. “No more running, Alexander. You have five more seconds.” And then, he softened the frustration in his voice by whispering, “Please, darling, open this door. Let me see you.”

Alec gnawed his lips indecisively for a few moments. Against his better judgement, Alec reached for the doorknob tentatively.

Magnus was so ready to break the door down when the door suddenly opened with a soft click, swaying open. The warlock stood frozen at the threshold as he was finally allowed to take in the sight of Alec. The shadowhunter had moved a few steps back, away from the door with his arms wrapped defensively around himself and yet he still looked strangely vulnerable. His large, haunting hazel eyes were red around the edges that showed of the recently shed tears. Magnus’s heart squeezed tightly at the sight of Alec’s defeated stance and his extremely unhealthy hue on this too-pale skins, making the black angelic runes stand out even more.

Alec had never looked this fragile before.

The urge to protect this man flared so consumingly that Magnus’s feet moved without him realising and in a few large strides, he stood in front Alec with his hands held out to pull Alec into his embrace urgently. He guided Alec into his arms and tucked the shadowhunter’s face into his neck, not caring whether Alec was receptive to his hug or not. Magnus kept his arms around them firmly, letting the feelings of security and warmth seeped through them. They stayed like that for a few moments before Magnus let his ringed fingers weave through Alec’s soft hair, allowing the comfort for both himself and Alec as his deep voice whispered consoling sounds.

Alec was paralysed with shock when Magnus pulled him into his hug. The contrast between Magnus’s previous dark and frustrated tone with his gentle embrace was surprising to Alec; he had been so sure Magnus would berate him for making this difficult. At this moment, his heart and mind warred against each other. His heart wanted so much to accept the solace that Magnus was offering but his mind was chastising him for being so weak. He didn’t want Magnus to do this but at the same time he wanted to accept Magnus’s help so badly because Alec didn’t think he had any strength left in him to fight this- this _endless_ pain that came with the vision.

Words of refusal and pretense were at tip of his tongue but Alec was so tired of ignoring the perpetual headaches, the continuing exhaustion and the uncertainty of the visions. Alec was so tired of being strong in front of his siblings and friends and even in front of the Clave. And most of all, Alec was so tired of being so near to Magnus, battling with this losing war of trying not to be in love with the warlock, and realising all along how he still found Magnus so damned attractive and caring and _good_ that no amount of reminders how they were just friends, were going to change that.

Alec _wanted_ Magnus despite of all his fears. He felt it deep within his heart, his bones and his soul.

These thoughts were boiling inside him as he stood frozen within Magnus’s arms, when finally weeks of pain and exhaustion and emotional stress drove Alec to admit defeat as he raised his hands to grasp tightly Magnus’s back, tentatively returning Magnus’s embrace. This action was the catalyst that broke down his previously impenetrable walls as his legs suddenly buckled weakly at the waves and waves of unchecked emotions. Tearful gasps unwillingly escaped from his mouth. With his face still hiding in the curve Magnus’s shoulder, Alec instantly shoved a fist into his mouth to stifle the rush of anguish cries but failed miserably.

Everything was becoming too much for Alec to handle and the knowledge that he would need to take Magnus’s lifespan was the metaphorical straw that broke the camel’s back.

Magnus gasped at the sudden heaviness as Alec’s feet crumbled; Alec was unable to support himself. But he was more surprise at the sheer distress in the sounds Alec made. It took a few quick moments for Magnus to realise that Alec was having a meltdown. _Finally_... Magnus thought with a deep sense of relief. Alec finally let down his defenses to allow himself a long deserved catharsis and Magnus was so glad he was here to catch Alec. “Shh, darling, it’s going to okay… I’m here, I’m always going to be here...” Magnus crooned as he flicked his fingers to magically close the door behind him and lock it, wanting to save Alec from public display. He, then, guided the inconsolable man, who was so deep in his misery to be aware of anything right now, towards the bed behind them. He laid both of them down on the bed after magically removing their shoes, and gathered Alec even more closely towards him.

Once the first rush of emotion broke through his defenses, Alec was helpless to stop the rest of the previously held back stress and unhappiness and fear from following through. The tears came down like a heavy downpour - relentless and unstoppable - that Alec could scarcely breathe. He clawed at Magnus’s shirt like a man struggling to stay above the quicksand that was burying him as his face was planted close onto Magnus’s chest, drenching the man’s shirt and yet, the warlock held him impossibly tighter and closer that surely they were sharing the same body by now.

“Oh, Alexander…” Magnus said softly, his heart ached terribly and his own tears were falling down at the sight of Alec’s breakdown. How long had Alec denied himself this? Surely the fate of the world was too much for one man to bear alone? “Breathe, darling. You need to breathe.” Magnus whispered, caressing his back, his arms and his hair in a desperate attempt to calm the panicky, hyperventilated Shadowhunter. “It’s okay, it’ll be alright…”

For many minutes to come, the room was filled only with the sounds of tears and comfort words. Magnus wiped his own tears away as he waited for Alec to take his own time and to find his way back to him. Alec’s anguished gasps and the frantic way he held Magnus eventually eased up and faded away that all that was left between them was calming quietness. It amazed Magnus that even when they were hurting like this, his heart kept on expanding with love at the feeling of Alec so close to him.

“Magnus…” Alec stammered after some time later, breaking the cocoon of silence. “I- I can’t…”

Magnus frowned as he gently pried Alec’s face away from his chest to face him. His face was a mess; tear-stains tracked down cheeks and nose, his eyes were red and puffy and his lips were swollen with the endless gnawing, but Alec had never looked more open and honest as he did right now and that made him the most beautiful person that Magnus had ever seen in his life. “You can’t what?” He asked softly.

Alec swallowed hard at Magnus’s earnest eyes. Just when he thought he had reached the bottom, Magnus caused him to fall deeper in love. “I can’t allow you to do this. I _won’t_ allow you to do this.”

“Why?” Magnus challenged. “Clary said that this rune will enable you to control the _Virtutis_ rune better. It will prevent you from burning your life out. This rune can save your life!”

Alec pushed himself away from Magnus and slowly sat up. “Forget my life!” Alec said in frustration. “Clary said your lifespan will be drained to support mine when the _Virtutis_ rune is activated! Do you think I care about my own life when you could lose yours.”

The atmosphere in the room instantly crackled with intense, uncontrollable magic as Magnus’s face darkened furiously. “Don’t you _dare_ say that!” The powerful warlock thundered.  

Alec was taken aback at Magnus’s anger. His eyes were wide as he looked at Magnus.

Magnus grabbed Alec’s hand, gripped it tight enough to be painful and his eyes narrowed. “Don’t you dare say you don’t care about your life! And don’t you dare say that I have no say whatsoever in this!”

“Magnus, I don’t need your kindness,” Alec pleaded. “I just need to know that you’ll be safe, that- that the Angels have no right to ask for your life to pursue their own agenda!”

“But the Angels have the right to ask for yours?!” Magnus said in utter disbelief.

“I’m a Shadowhunter…” Alec said helplessly. He didn’t know why Magnus didn’t understand.

“And what do you mean ‘my kindness’?” Magnus was furious. “Since when everything that I do for you is out of kindness?!”

Alec bit his lips as he stared back at the warlock wordlessly.

“If you think that I’m willing to this because I’m offering you a favour, you are so wrong. When I asked you before whether you want to know about my thought on this rune, you think I’m offering my life and soul because I am _kind_?!” Fury flashed in the dark eyes as Magnus snapped. Alec swallowed hard at the sight of Magnus flushed in restrained anger.

“I don’t know what to think,” Alec said. “All I know is I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Magnus ignored Alec’s pleading words as he continued relentlessly. “Did you know what Clary said after you left, Alexander? She said that our souls will be bound for eternity. She said even death cannot sever the bond. She said that I could lose my immortality. Do you think I would do all that out of _kindness_?” Magnus stressed.

The pair of hazel eyes immediately went wide at Magnus’s words as he scrambled on his feet and slowly retreated. This revelation that Magnus could lose his immortality made Alec feel light-headed and breathless. “Clary said it’ll cost you your immortality?” He breathed in absolute horror.

Magnus stared at Alec’s white face, belatedly realising his mistake, and cursed at himself for being so blunt. “Alexander… listen to me.” He stood up as well, putting up his hands in a calming manner.

“Not only I’ll drain your lifespan but I’ll cause you to lose your immortality? And you’ll be stuck with me forever?” The world around Alec spinned. The thought of Magnus losing out the thing that made him.. well, _Magnus Bane_ made Alec feel nauseated. This was worse than he thought. He had thought if they did use the rune, Alec could use the it sparingly and maybe Magnus could come out unscathed. But causing Magnus to lose his immortality? Causing them to be bound forever without any mean of severing it? Causing Magnus his _freedom_? Oh… he couldn’t… The price was too high to pay.

Magnus grabbed Alec’s biceps and forced the Shadowhunter to look at him. “Alexander! I want that.” But the words passed through Alec unheard as he went deeper into misery.

“No… no, no, no!” Alec groaned in despair, covering his face with his hands.  

“Alexander!” Magnus shook Alec hard, trying to force Alec out of his misery and to look at him. “I WANT THAT!” Magnus shouted.

Alec’s eyes snapped up to meet Magnus in disbelief. “What…?”

Now that Magnus had Alec’s attention, he slid his hands upwards to cup Alec’s sharp jaws and to caress the sunken cheeks. His eyes bore deep into Alec’s, wanting desperately to make Alec understand him. “I want that,” He repeated softly. “I want all of you - all the good and the bad.  I want to share my life with you and to share my soul with you. And more than anything, I want _that_ chance - no matter how small the possibility is - the chance to grow old with you and to have you by my side for always - forever, even beyond death.”

“You can’t mean that,” Alec shook his head in denial. “Magnus, you have lived hundreds of years before me and you’re going to live hundreds of years more to come. You’ll have everything the world has to offer. Please don’t do this. I’m fleeting. I’m just…” A lump of sadness form in his throat. “I’m just a speck of a moment in your life just like any other person before me. Don’t waste you immortality on me.”

These things that Alec kept saying was making Magnus furious. Didn’t Alec understand how _important_ he was to him? Magnus couldn’t even draw an easy breath without Alec and Alec wanted him to live his life beyond him? “Waste? Just now you thought I’m doing this out of kindness and now you think you’re a waste? How insignificant do you think my feelings for you?” Magnus asked slowly, frustration bleed through the words.

At that question, Alec’s mouth snapped shut as he slowly slumped back on the bed, his back bowed in the defeated posture and his hands covered his face. “I don’t know what to think. I want to believe that we mean something. But I… I realise a while ago that our passion burned too fast and too hot and now, I cannot help but thinking that, for you, it had burnt out, ...that I’m just another passing history for you. Because all I can see is how easy you walked away from me that day while it shattered my world.”

Alec paused before softly said, “So, you can imagine my confusion when you want us to reconnect as friends. I don’t know where I stand with you. ”

Alec’s words crushed Magnus. He had always known Alec feared and doubted him, but it was a different thing to hear it right from his mouth. “Oh, darling…” Magnus whispered. He kneeled on the floor, in front of Alec, grabbing the hands that were covering the face and gripped them tight. He looked up to Alec’s eyes, seeing the sadness so clearly that for the countless times, he hated himself for causing that. “Alexander, for the hundreds of years that I have lived, I have tasted the bitterest of loneliness. I have tasted the intense longing of having someone beside me, loving me unconditionally and taking me as I am. I have watched my friends grow old and die with the one they loved and I’ve often thought how lucky they were and how I would never... have that.”

“And then I saw you that day, looking so confident around your bow and arrows but so awkward around people. I saw your softness inside the sharp barbs you’ve surrounded yourself in and I said to myself that this man was indeed something special, someone worth pursuing for. Do you remember when I told you that you’ve unlocked something inside of me? But what you don’t know is that you’re the cure for my constant pain of loneliness - the everlasting bane of a warlock. After knowing you - loving you - , I know that I can’t go back to the way that I was before.”

Alec was lost for words at the raw, vulnerability confession from Magnus. At that moment, Magnus was as human as any mortal.

“Do you know what I think about this rune?” Magnus said. “The rune is the answer to all my wishes. I’ve wished to assist you and to ease your burden; this rune gives me that. When you were dying a few days back and when I realise that you’re still dying from these visions despite _Virtutis_ rune, I’ve wished that I can offer you my health, my life and even my soul just so that I can keep you here with me even if for a while longer. And the rune gives me that too.”

“You see, Alexander, it’s never about kindness, it’s about _selfishness_. _My_ selfishness. It’s about my desire to keep you with me forever, in this life and even beyond that. And if I have to give up my immortality - my lonely and bitter immortality -, what a small price to pay it is. It is the price that I’m more than willing to pay.” Magnus said hoarsely.

“But, Magnus, how can I live, knowing the cost that you’ll have to pay because of me?” Alec said softly - insecurity seeped deep within him and his heart ached terribly. “And, what if you hated me later on or what if we broke up again? This is something that we can’t undo. There will be no walking away from this. By the Angels, I don’t ever want to trap you.”

Magnus raised his hand to stroke the sharp line along Alec’s jaw. “I know you still have doubt from the last time but, _angel_ , no matter how much I regretted it, I can’t undo the past; I can only learn from it and try my best not to repeat it. So, please believe me when I say that I’m here to stay and I’m not going anywhere without you, not anymore…” Magnus said earnestly. “Plus, you can’t never trap the willing party,” he joked nervously as he looked into Alec’s eyes, swallowing hard as his heart thundered at the look of indecisiveness on Alec’s face.  

“ _Alexander, I love you_ .” Magnus blurted out; his voice was thick with emotions. He didn’t plan for the words to come out, not when they had agreed to remain as friends. But how could he stay silent when the words were practically bursting out from his heart? He _needed_ to say them. “I love you to the point that words cannot describe my feelings for you. You've had overshadowed my previous lovers and you've made me forget the previous heartaches. I love you as friends, as confidants, as partner-in-crime, and if you’re willing, as lovers once again. By the Heavens, I don’t want to be where you’re not. _I can’t._ ”

Just when Alec thought he had shed all of his tears, Magnus’s heartfelt words caused fresh tears to emerge. His heart expanded, his throat tightened and his breaths stuttered. The fear that was haunting him for so long - ever since Magnus left him - evaporated like nothing in the face of the magnitude of Magnus’s love for him. Because now Alec knew that Magnus felt what he felt; that Alec, too, didn’t want to be where Magnus wasn’t and he, too, wanted to keep Magnus with him forever.

“Magnus, I-,” Alec stuttered before trying again. It’s been so long since he said those words but right now, he had never been this _sure_ and _brave_ about his feelings towards Magnus. “I love you too. And I’ve never stopped loving you.”

Magnus’s eyes were wide at Alec’s unexpected reciprocation. What did that mean? Did that mean Alec was willing to try this again with him? _Please… oh, please…_ Magnus prayed. “Alexander… does that mean-” He halted, afraid of Alec’s answer.

“Yes,” Alec smiled through his tears.

“Yes… what?” Magnus could scarcely breathe. This uncertainty would be the death of him. “Yes to the rune? Yes to us?”

Alec placed his hands on Magnus’s neck and shoulder, stroking the soft spots underneath Magnus’s ears. He let out a short, shuddering laugh as exhilaration smothered him. “Yes to everything that you asked of me,” he said.

The words that Alec uttered broke the chains that held Magnus back for so long and he abruptly lunged upwards to place his lips on Alec’s. He immediately tasted the remnant of saltiness of the tears Alec had shed and yet beneath it, there was something sweet, addictive and uniquely Alexander. He hadn’t tasted these lips for nearly six months and when he finally, _finally_ was allowed to do so, Magnus groaned at the feel of Alec’s soft, generous lips against him like a man stumbled upon an oasis in the middle of a desert. The hands that were cradling Alec’s jaws tightened - afraid of letting him go lest that this was all a dream - as Magnus’s mouth plundered the pliant one.

Alec closed his eyes to allow himself to feel Magnus’s kiss. The kiss lacked in the usual finesse that Magnus had often used to seduce him. Instead, the kiss was harsh and desperate. Even then, Alec thought of how he had missed this. He had missed the taste of Magnus’s tongue in him, asserting his dominance over him and of how the warlock always tasted like the sweetness of the cocktail he was always fond of. He missed the sureness of Magnus’s kiss as every practiced move pushed Alec higher in maddening desire. And most of all, Alec missed how tangible Magnus’s love for him felt in every kiss that they shared.

This was not enough, Magnus thought frantically, it would never be enough, so, he got on to his feet without breaking the kiss, pushing Alec down on the bed as he crawled on top of the lanky Shadowhunter. Magnus’s heart stuttered at the way Alec spread his legs slightly in silent invitation and at feel of Alec’s hands slid underneath his shirt, across his back, and up towards his shoulder before digging his nails into his flesh.

Magnus never thought that he would have this again. He never thought that he would have Alec beneath him, yielding so sweetly and so willingly. He never thought that he would feel Alec’s familiar, clumsy and yet needy touches on him, not after the cruel way they had treated each other. Magnus missed this so much that his heart ached painfully. These were much, much better than those dreams that he had almost every nights. So, the warlock deepened the kiss, urging Alec’s to open his mouth wider for his deeper plundering. When Alec parted his lips wider at the warlock’s insistence, Magnus groaned and dipped his tongue into the hot mouth as he tasted the sweetness of Alec even more.

The kiss was urgent, hot and desperate as both men tried to get closer to each other. The mattress dipped low and shook slightly when Magnus used one of his hands to cradle the back of Alec’s head and the other one to lift Alec’s leg, urging him to wrap his long leg around the warlock’s waist. When Alec mindlessly did, Magnus took the opportunity to press his hips onto Alec, rocking both them. Alec gasped in surprise through Magnus's endless kiss at the sharp feeling of pleasure when he felt Magnus’s hardness grinded against him through their clothes.

This was going too fast, Alec thought through the haze of distracted pleasure at the insistent rhythm that Magnus set. His nails dug deeper into Magnus’s corded back, but he couldn’t find it within him to care. Because Alec hadn’t felt like this for so long and the scent and the sound of Magnus’s deep voice surrounded the Shadowhunter like a comforting blanket. All of his pent-up emotions was bubbling within him, anticipating for the final release. His senses were so acutely attuned to the man above him and by the Angels, Alec didn’t want this to stop.

When Magnus finally released his lips, Alec breathed in the much needed air before choking back a surprise cry when he felt Magnus’s talented mouth search for the next sensitive stop. It seemed that the warlock hadn’t forgotten how to switch Alec on as Magnus nibbled, licked and sucked Alec’s neck along the incredibly sensitive rune. The sensations that Magnus invoked were too much and he didn’t think that he was going to last long. So, Alec ran his hands through Magnus’s hair and he tightened his leg grip around Magnus’s waist in his attempt to slow them down but these actions only urged the warlock to move faster.

“Magnus...” The words came out intended as a persuasion to slow down but Alec closed his eyes in frustration when he heard how needy he sounded. He sounded wrecked; he sounded like he was so close to the edge - he was asking Magnus for more.

And clearly Magnus took it as such as he left the bruising skin on Alec’s neck to stare in such awe at _his_ Shadowhunter, who was lost in ecstasy, without stopping the grinding of his hips against Alec’s. Alec had his eyes closed so tightly and his lips parted slightly as gasps and moans escaped. The perpetually pale skin was flushed in building passion; he was so beautiful like this, and by all the magic in this world... Magnus wanted badly to see Alec reaching that pinnacle. He wanted Alec to know that it was _he_ who knew how to render Alec like this with only a few practiced touches and it was only _he_ who could give Alec this pleasure. There would be no one else ever. So, he braced himself on his knees, flicked magic to provide lubricant on each other’s members while still retaining the clothes, and leaned down to place his mouth on the sensitive spot just underneath his ear.

Alec felt his cheeks became warm in embarrassment at how easy it was for Magnus to make him like this. With only a few simpls kisses and touches, Alec was moaning his way to climax. Maybe having gone six months without touching himself had caused him to act like this, or maybe it was simply because of Magnus - Alec couldn’t be sure. They still had their clothes on and wasn’t it fifteen minutes ago Alec was crying like the world was ending? But as soon as Magnus started sucking the soft skin below his ear and moved his hips against Alec’s, all the embarrassment was gone as pleasure overtook his mind.

He threw his head aside abandonly to urge Magnus further in his ministration and the leg that he had wrapped around Magnus’s waist tightened. The lubricant made the movement painless, the sensation intensified and Alec was so, so lost in Magnus’s lovemaking. The warlock was no less affected by this as Alec was brought higher by the desperate sounds that Magnus made. They were both equally racing and helping each other reaching for the climax.

“Come on, Alexander,” Magnus whispered into his once-again lover’s ear, loving every shudder that Alec gifted him. “Reach for it and I’ll give it to you.”           

“Magnus…” Alec groaned as he tightened his grip on Magnus. Everything about this was both familiar and yet, still so very new. “I’m close...”

Magnus lifted his head from Alec’s neck to pepper urgent kisses on Alec’s temple, cheek, nose before kissing the archer’s lips, long and wet. “Yes, darling… Come on.” Magnus breathed as he doubled his efforts.

Just when Alec thought he couldn’t take it anymore, the orgasm took him so suddenly - sharp and too much. His senses went white as the climax blanketing his body and Alec arched his back and gasped. At the back of his mind, he heard Magnus’s praising words - _you’re so beautiful, you’re mine, always mine and I’m always going to give you this_ \- and that made his body shudder in pleasure. He vaguely aware of Magnus’s groans as the warlock found his own satisfaction before letting his leg unwind from the warlock’s waist and fall carelessly on the bed.

Alec basked in the afterglow of the frantic lovemaking as he felt Magnus’s harsh breathing against his ear and the comforting weight and warm of his lover on top of him. A corner of his lips quirked slightly upwards at the cool feeling of Magnus’s necklace brushed against the heated skin of his neck.  

A few minutes later, when he resurfaced back to consciousness, his eyes tiredly opened to the mesmerising eyes of Magnus’s unglamoured ones, looking down fondly at him. As when he first saw them, Alec still found the cat-eyes to be devastatingly beautiful. _I miss this_ , Alec thought sleepily.

“I miss this, too, angel.” Magnus whispered, caressing his lover’s high cheekbones reverently. Alec blushed when he realised he had spoken out loud. With another flick of finger, Magnus cleaned the mess that they made inside their pants, laughing softly when he saw Alec’s blush intensify. _Please don’t ever change, Alexander,_ Magnus thought as he dropped a kiss on the flushing cheek. Magnus was so in love with Alec that it wasn’t even funny.

“I mean what I say, Alexander.” Magnus said, seriously. “I want this rune and I want us. There’s no changing my mind.”

“I want this too.” Alec said, looking firmly up to Magnus. All of his doubts was gone. “No matter what happens next, I’ll always want you..”

“Are you sure, darling? Because it is not just me who would be affected. You would be too and Clary said that even the Angels are not sure of the true effect of this rune.” Magnus said worryingly.

“Magnus, if you stayed by my side, the uncertainty doesn’t scare me,” Alec said as he lifted his head slightly to place a reassuring kiss on the corner Magnus’s lips that the warlock was helpless to do anything except to chase after the lips and prolonged the kiss. When they broke up, Alec whispered, “I don’t have anything to be fear about because I have your soul tethers to mine throughout anything.”

He continued through his smiles. “How can I ask for anything more than this?”

 

* * * * * *

Magnus lingered for as long as he could as he watched Alec sleep. After the intimate conversation that they shared, the Shadowhunter finally gave in to his exhaustion. The day had already inched into late afternoon and Magnus couldn’t believe how much had happened in just one day. They had seen Alec and Jace activated the _Virtutis_ rune, which nearly caused the _parabatai_ pair to decimate the Institute; Clary was revealed a new rune to assist Alec bearing the immeasurable Angelic power; and the best of it all, Alec had finally let go his fear and allow Magnus in his life once again.

All these blessings were too much that Magnus had pinched himself to make sure that he wasn’t dreaming at all. Letting out a soft, contented sigh, Magnus leaned down to press a gentle kiss on Alec’s forehead and another one on his lips just because he could. Then, he straightened his clothes and hair before leaving the room to search for Isabelle or Jace or even Clary.

They weren’t at Alec’s office or at the training area, so Magnus wandered to the library. The sight of Magnus walking around the Institute no longer phased the other Shadowhunters in the Institute. They all barely spared Magnus any look. He peeked into the library and smiled when he saw all three Shadowhunters that he was looking were sitting and talking. There was no one else in this place. Magnus walked in, alerting his arrival, and that, had all three Shadowhunters jumped up in anxiousness. “I can’t believe that you all are still here, brooding.” Magnus raised his eyebrows. “Please tell me that you’ve all at least eaten something.”

Jace waved away Magnus’s concern carelessly. “Later. Please tell me that Alec has agreed.” Worry in the blond Shadowhunter’s voice was tangible.

“Well, Alec was hard to convince-” Magnus started.

“Of course he’ll be hard to convince!” Isabelle cut in agitatedly. “Alec can be stubborn and self-sacrificing but you need to try harder, Magnus, because without this rune, he’s going to die!”

“Yeah,” Jace said restlessly. “That idiot would probably moan over how he would cause hurt to you or to me or even to a _strayed kitten_ if you let him!”

Magnus held back a laugh at the Lightwoods, thinking that they all shared the same self-sacrificing and over-protectiveness traits. None of them had any right to criticise one another. “Calm down. It took some persuasion but Alec has agreed to do this.”

“What, really?” Isabelle was taken aback. “I thought it would be harder to convince him. That must have been one hell of a persuasion.”

Magnus smiled softly. “I have also persuaded him to forgive me. So, I’m happy to tell you that Alec and I have kissed and made up.”

There was a heartbeat of shocked silence before they reacted. The warlock wasn’t expected the shriek of happiness that came from Isabelle as the long, dark-haired Shadowhuntress ran towards Magnus to jump and give him a tight hug. Or the ecstatic claps and bouncing from Clary. Or the huge smile on Jace’s face as the man thumped his back in congratulatory manners. The happiness was contagious as all of them shared laughters.

“Oh, Magnus! I’m so happy for you!” Isabelle gushed, releasing her arms around Magnus.

“I wasn’t expecting Alec to let go of his fear; I still can’t believe it,” Magnus smiled.

“See,” Jace put his hands on his waist, looking so proud at his _parabatai’s_ bravery. “I told you all that Alec needed was time. And that he will eventually do the right thing. So, thank you for being patient with him.”

Magnus looked kind of surprise at Jace’s words. “Thank me? Oh, I’m the grateful one, Jace. This is the one chance that I don’t think I would ever have.”

“It’s love, Magnus,” Clary smiled as she shrugged her pretty, slim shoulders. “We can stray away from each other, walk the different paths, but a love that is as strong as yours will always allow you to find your way back.”

Jace smiled at the wise words that came out of Clary’s mouth, falling even further in love with this girl who stumbled into his life so unexpectedly. So, he pulled Clary close to his side before bending down his head to kiss on the top of Clary’s head.

“Where’s Alec?” Isabelle asked. She was still breathless from the excitement.

“I left him asleep in his room,” Magnus answered. “He is tired.”

Jace smirked lasciviously. “Of course he’s tired. That must have been one hell of a kiss-and-make-up.”

It didn’t even phase the ancient warlock. “Sorry, Jace. I don’t do kiss-and-tell.” Magnus drawled.

“Oh, grow up!” Isabelle rolled her eyes. “The only reason I ask is because I thought that maybe we could draw the  _Anima_ rune on both of you now.”

"We will have to wait for him to wake up first," Magnus said. "While we wait, how about we find something to eat. I know you all probably have _Nourishment_ rune but nothing beats a real meal.”

The shadowhunters looked at each other before Jace shrugged his shoulders. “Sure, I could eat.”

“Yeah, okay, me too,” Clary said and Isabelle nodded her head in agreement.

Magnus clapped his hands, blue magic crackles between them. “Any preference?” Clearly that was a mistake because the shadowhunters immediately demanded their own preferences without shame and Magnus could only shook his head in fond exasperation as he tried to accommodate their demands. This was the only thing that made Alec different compared to his siblings. The Head of Institute was never good in voicing out his preferences in anything, preferring to be content at whatever that was given to him. Still, Magnus loved finding his ways tentatively around the introvert Shadowhunter. It was like uncovering a gift wrapped in layers of boxes and wrappers.  

The whoops and cheers when Magnus conjured up a nicely decorated table with their foods and drinks cause the warlock to laugh as well, deeply amused at the sheer and unexpected childishness. It made Magnus realise that despite of everything that they had gone through together, these shadowhunters were still so young.

For the next few hours, the office was filled with conversations, laughter and cheers. Seeing all this made Magnus’s heart expand.  Alec didn’t only bring with him his love and happiness, the dark-haired man also brought with him this extended family that Magnus never thought he needed. Oh, they had their own shortcomings, _especially Jace_ , but Magnus wouldn’t want them change into anybody else. He wanted them to stay as they were - so fierce in defending the people that they love, so blindingly loyal and so unfailingly generous in everything that they do. These four shadowhunters made up all of the Clave’s shortcomings - it made Magnus believe that the world could be changed for the better.

He might be not be alive to see it, but the thought didn’t bother him at all. A lifetime with Alec was more sufficient than an eternity of loneliness.

Jace was laughing at something Isabelle said when suddenly a sharp pain flared at his side. He dropped the fork that he was holding with a loud clang as he grabbed his _parabatai_ rune tightly. He couldn’t stop the gasp from escaping his mouth.

“Jace?” Magnus frowned, his heart immediately stuttered in sudden spike of anxiety. “What’s wrong?”

“My rune..” Jace breathed through the sudden pain as he stood up; his hand still on his side. “Something is wrong with Alec. He felt… scared.”

The rest of them stood up as well - previous cheerful atmosphere dissipated. “Is it the vision?” Isabelle asked urgently.

“I don’t think so, Alec’s vision never affected me before. Right now, I think he is physically hurt…” Jace gritted his teeth at the throbbing pain.

Magnus didn’t wait any longer as he ran out of library towards Alec’s room. He didn’t look back to see whether he was being followed because his thought was focused on solely reaching for Alec. Behind him, the rest of the shadowhunters ran after the warlock equal anxiousness. A series of awful thoughts crossed through Magnus’s mind as he burst through Alec’s room without warning and the empty room that greeted him caused Magnus to falter momentarily.

“He’s not here,” Magnus said uselessly. “I left him here sleeping. Where’s he?” _I can’t even leave him alone for even a second!_

“He’s gotta be close,” Jace said as he pressed his _parabatai_ rune harder. “I feel him close. He’s still inside the Institute.”

Isabelle turned around and grabbed a long-haired, blond Shadowhunter who was passing by them, “Where’s Alec?”

The woman stuttered for a moment, before answering, “I saw Alec go to his office half an hour ago. He said he had a visitor.”

“A visitor?” Isabelle frowned but Magnus and Jace didn’t wait for an answer. They rushed towards Alec’s office and when they got there, they were halted at the sight in front them.

On the floor, Alec was moaning in pain on his knees as he was clawing at his head with his right hand as the vision engulfed him. However, what made them pause was the way Alec's left hand was bleeding with wound; some sort of sharp, metal rod was stabbed carelessly through his palm. However, clearly the pain from the vision vastly outweighed the injury in his hand as Alec ignored the gaping wound in his hand in favour of the one inside his head. Magnus wondered whether Alec had hurt himself to alert Jace about his predicament - that a vision was consuming him and Alec was left defenseless against this onslaught. But the wound was awfully deep to be self-inflicted… Quickly, Magnus recovered his composure.

“Jace! Come on!”  Magnus called at Jace, who immediately rushed through the doorway to reach for his _parabatai._ Just as he did it many times before, Jace methodically yanked down the collar of Alec’s shirt down to reveal the _Virtutis_ rune.

“Damn it, Alec!” Jace cursed. “What did you do to yourself? There has got to be a better way to call me than stabbing your hand!”

Magnus reached for Alec, pulling him close as he felt Alec’s body strained against the familiar rush of power as the _Virtutis_ rune was activated. While Jace shared his life-energy to Alec, Magnus caught Alec’s injured hand, slowing pulling out the rod before weaving his fingers through Alec’s and magically healing the deep wound.

Alec raised his head to meet Magnus’s eyes - the hazel eyes were tinged with blue as they usually were when the _Virtutis_ rune was activated. Those eyes were glassy as well, seeing something far away in future. In an eerie tone; totally oblivious of the blood streaming down his nose with his eyes still gazing into the vision, Alec gasped, “I didn’t do it to myself...”

“Alexander?” Magnus frowned.

“It’s Edward… Magnus, we’ve gotta save him…” Alec whispered before the vision released its claws and he keeled over in unconsciousness.

 

 

 

* * * * * *


	10. Vengeance is an ugly, endless feeling.

 

* * *

  _Where do you think you’re going?_

_With your future bleak and your heart heavy_

_Don’t you think that it’s time to give in?_

_Vengeance is a force that levies_.

* * *

 

Edward Stone was an ordinary warlock. He wasn’t an offspring of any Greater Demon and he certainly wasn’t blessed with immense magic at his disposal. But if anybody would ask him, Edward would say that the only thing that he had going with him was his impressive longevity and of course, his luck of always choosing the winning side in any war that he participated. He had learned to be shrewd but not to the point of bitterness and calculated but never scheming. These were the skills hundreds of years in the making.  

Despite having seen all the world had to offer, there were still several things in life that managed to blindside him. Alexander Lightwood was one of them. Having losing people he loved so many times before he went for hiding for a hundred year had made him think that he would never be interested in anybody else. He had kept his heart so frozen that he had forgotten how it felt like. But one look at Alec, something inside his dead heart stuttered. Edward wasn’t expecting himself to be reacting like this. And he wasn’t worried about the fact Alec was freshly heartbroken. Time was something Edward had in abundance and if there was one thing that was consistent in this world was the fact time made everything _endurable_.

What worried him was the way Magnus Bane kept pretending to not look at them when he and Alec were interacting, and the way Alec unconsciously kept looking at Magnus for reassurance. Alec had never told him who broke his heart, but something told him that maybe, the person was not completely out of Alec’s life. This kind of thought made Edward restless and he didn’t want to sit quietly here at the home, mulling over these facts, not when he could simply go to the Alec’s office and see him.

The hour was quite late, but not late enough that he couldn’t squeeze a little bit of his time to see Alec. He made up his mind and quickly he portaled his way to the Institute, informing the guarding Shadowhunter that he wished to see the Head of Institute. The Shadowhunter looked at him, recognising him from yesterday before nodding his head. The atmosphere in the Institute felt tense, like something dire had happened recently.  

Once they arrived at Alec’s office, the Shadowhunter nodded his head before asking him to wait here while he went to get Alec. Edward looked around the office, noticing the dark and masculine designs, and he was amused at how the interiors fitted Alec’s personality perfectly. He waited for nearly fifteen minutes when the door of the office swung open to reveal the man that he wanted to see. Edward looked closer at Alec, worrying at just how unhealthy Alec looked. What was going on? “Hello again, Alexander.”

Alec looked like he was fresh from shower. The ends of his black hair were damp and curled at his nap endearingly. He also tried to hide a slight grimace at the name. “Edward! I thought of calling you tomorrow for an update. And please, just called me Alec.”

Edward frowned deeper. Apparently, only _Magnus Bane_ was allowed to call him _Alexander._ Interesting. He wondered who Magnus was to Alec. “If you insist,” Edward said instead.

“So, what brings you back here?” Alec walked towards Edward and greeted him pleasantly. Up-close, Alec looked practically wasting away. His cheekbones were more prominent, his skin was practically translucent and there was something fragile in the way he carried himself.

“Before I venture into that, would you care to tell what is wrong with you?” Edward asked. “The High Warlock and Jace Herondale said that you’re having some sort of trouble with the visions that the Angels sent you. Is this why you look like this?”

Alec tightened his lips at that question. He guessed that there was no blaming on Jace or Magnus for telling Edward about his predicament, not when he _did_ look like on the verge of collapsing. Plus, he really couldn’t say _he’s fine_ to Edward, not when the man practically spoon-fed them with the information about the creature that they couldn’t find anywhere. He owed Edward at least an explanation. “I’m a Shadowhunter that is not equipped to accept any form of communication from the Angels. These visions are too much for me to handle and I’ve been receiving them for weeks. So, if Clary wasn’t given the _Virtutis_ rune, I would probably be dead by now.” Alec said succinctly.

Edward’s mouth parted slightly at the blunt revelation. A dozen responses flitted through his mind but one look at Alec’s closed off expression, Edward knew any words of consolation would not be appreciated. So, he settled for, “I'm sorry to hear that but at least, tell me that you’re going to be okay – that the _Virtutis_ rune is preventing you from dying.”

Alec hesitated. He knew that Edward was kind of interested in him, but for the life of him, Alec didn’t understand why it mattered to the warlock whether if he died or not. It wasn’t as if Alec was worth being worried after. “It’s doing its job just fine so far. Considering the alternative, I couldn’t really complain,” Alec said diplomatically.

“You and your  _parabatai_ are the second Shadowhunters that I met, who are bestowed with this rune. And I’ve lived a very long time. You don’t know how special you are, Alec.”

Alec just smiled because he didn’t feel special. All he was just trying to do was to get through one day at a time, even though some days he felt like everything was smothering him too much and too fast. “I’ve yet to see that,” Alec said quietly. “But I hope that you’re right.”

Edward held out his hand to offer a quick squeeze comfort at Alec’s shoulder before pulling his hand away, acutely aware of how uncomfortable Alec was with other people’s touches. This reticence that Alec always seemed to carry with him endeared Edward in the strangest way. It made Edward want to peel each layer carefully until he uncovered the core of the real Alec. “Can you spare me some of your time?” He said, switching the topic of the conversation.

“Yeah, sure,” Alec gestured Edward to have a seat. As they took a seat across each other, Alec wondered where his family was and whether Magnus had portaled home. He had woken up alone in his bed, spending a few moments calming his ragged breaths at the thought that Magnus had left him _again_. Or at the thought that maybe today’s reconciliation was merely a very vivid dream that he conjured up. But the way his lips bruised from Magnus’s kisses and the way his skin still ached at Magnus’s rough attention were enough evidence that that was not a dream at all.

But why wasn’t the warlock here? Had something happened? If so, why wasn’t he notified? So, he got up, took the third shower of the day and dressed up. He had every intention to look for his siblings or Magnus, if the warlock was still here, when one of the Shadowhunters swung by his room and informed him that Edward was waiting for him at his office. And here he was, curious of the reason Edward’s visit. “So, is there something that I can help you with?”

“I’m not sure if this is worth mentioning but I never told you about the reason why I went into solitude for a century,” Edward started. Alec said nothing, but his earnest eyes indicated his interest in the matter.

“A century ago, I had lost my friend - my oldest and longest friend. He was with me during the incident with Samuel and throughout our life, we were never too far away. He was the constant in my life until he wasn’t anymore. His behaviour was kind of odd during the last few years before his demise, but I thought nothing of it. And when he died so suddenly, it… _devastated_ me. I couldn’t face this world any longer at that time because everything and everywhere reminded me of him. And so, I hid myself from the world.”

Alec’s eyes softened in complete sympathy and his hand instinctively reached out to Edward’s shoulder, squeezing it tightly. He wondered whether all warlocks had the same reaction when they lost the people they loved - that they tend to close off their heart for a long time. His heart ached when he imagined Magnus going through the same thing after he passed away. He didn’t like thinking Magnus being unhappy. “I don't mean to pry but was he your…?” Alec spoke up hesitantly.

“Lover? No,” Edward sighed. “We were never meant to take that path. Our friendship was always enough for us. The bond that we shared was deep, strong and _ancient_ that when it was cut off… I just couldn’t face the world. Imagine if you’ve lost your _parabatai_.”

 _I don’t have to._ Alec thought as his rune started to throb in phantom pain at the remembrance of that awful feeling of _parabatai_ tether being snapped. When he was still under impression that Jace was gone, it took Magnus to guide him to the portal and to the Lake Lyn because Alec just _couldn’t see_ the way any longer. The grief of losing half of his soul had made him blind.

Alec swallowed hard before asking, “Did it work? Being all alone for so long?”

“Not really. I was numb, like I was frozen in this time capsule where everybody changed and moved on except me. This is the downside of being an immortal - you would always be left behind in this world. There were times when I thought of finding my own escape,” Edward met Alec’s eyes and saw the absolute empathy in those hypnotizing hazel eyes - like he understood the way the darkness swallowed him that he couldn’t find any light on his own. It was then he realised that Alec had been the same dark place that he was. “You too, Alec?” Edward said softly.

Alec looked startled before looking away in shame. The guilt for murdering Jocelyn would always be the dark cloud hanging over him, shadowing him when he was alone, when he was feeling inadequate in his job and especially, when _he was looking at Clary_. It didn't matter whether he was being possessed at that time, it was _his_ hand that had plunged into Jocelyn’s heart. Being with his family, friends and Magnus had helped push the dark cloud away but when he was alone, the grief and the insecurity and the self-hatred would always come back. “It was a long time ago,” Alec said quietly.

Edward reached out to try wiping away the dark circle under Alec’s eyes, returning the comfort that Alec offered him earlier, and this time, Alec stayed still, hesitantly accepting the reassurance from the warlock. Edward’s thumbs felt unfamiliar, smooth and soft along his cheekbones and the impossibly dark eyes bore deep into his, making Alec feel consumed. Alec swallowed hard. 

“Oh, Alec… What does it matter if it happened last year or a hundred years ago? Some pain remains fresh no matter how hard we try to let it go. I _know_. You shouldn’t dismiss it like it doesn’t matter.”

The warlock in front of him looked so wise and emotionally capable that a burst feeling of admiration sparked inside Alec’s heart. “You’re so strong, Edward,” Alec admitted. “I wish I have even an ounce of that strength in me.”

Edward laughed incredulously. Didn’t Alec know how strong he was too? “What are you talking about? We’re both here, are we not? Despite everything that had happened and despite everything that we felt back then, we still managed to pull ourselves away from the ledge. That took courage that not all people understood, Alec. Know that we share the same strength.”

Alec smiled softly at those words. Edward Stone had come into his life as a suspect, which then, had turned into a very valuable and informative ally and now, unexpectedly, Edward had kind of become Alec’s friend. It was a strange feeling because Alec _didn’t_ have friends outside Izzy, Jace, Clary and Magnus. He didn't think it even counted because Izzy and Jace were his family and Magnus was his lover.

Edward was delighted to see some of Alec’s reticence towards him was gone. When the Shadowhunter smile softly like that, Edward marvelled at how it caused the hard, brooding edges to disappear from Alec’s face, making him look so young and incredibly beautiful. He had never wanted to get to know anyone as much as he wanted to know Alec right now. He felt so drawn towards Alec. But Edward didn’t want to push this too fast.

“Anyway,” Edward continued. “The reason I came here is to tell you that I just realised that I'm the only one who is still alive and had been there when Samuel opened the rift. It just occurred me yesterday.”

“Do you think that this is important as to what is happening right now?” Alec asked seriously.

“I don’t know, Alec. If you asked me a hundred years ago, I'd probably say no. But when I was in the isolation, I kept dreaming of that day - the day Samuel opened the rift, which was weird because I haven’t had that memory for a very long time. I didn’t even remember the details. But when I had that dream, it was vivid and detailed, and it brought up some really unpleasant memories that I’d rather forget. That was why when I saw Jace Herondale with the _Virtutis_ rune on his hand, it just fell in place.” Edward shrugged. “A thousand years is a very long time, Alec, and without the dreams that I had during my isolation, I doubt that I could even remember how _Virtutis_ rune looked like or even how the summoning circle looked like.”

It made sense, Alec thought. He had found it weird how Edward was able to recognise all of the intrinsic symbols and designs that happened a very long time ago. “Do you know what caused you to dream? Could it be some sort of premonition?”

“You're the one who has the ability to see the future, Alec, not me,” Edward smiled amusedly. “But, back then, I thought that the death of my dearest friend triggered it. After all, he was the only link that I had left to that day. But now, seeing you as the _Receptorem_ \- a complete impossibility -, I don’t know… maybe it’s somehow connected. The how and why part… don’t ask me.”

Alec bit his lips in silent contemplation. “I’m not sure whether this will help but we have tried using _Virtutis_ rune outside the vision.”

“Oh?” Edward leaned forward in deep interest. “And what is the verdict?”

“It was… surprising. You didn’t tell us that it is destructive as well,” Alec said slowly. “I thought the purpose of the _Virtutis_ rune is to generate some sort of force field or barrier to hold the creature from coming out. But when we tried it, we nearly levelled the Institute.”

“What?! That was not what happened before.” Edward exclaimed, thoroughly surprise. “Back then, the _Virtutis_ rune was given with the sole purpose of closing the rift and nothing more. After the Samuel’s incident, I had never seen the previous _Parabatai_ pair used the _Virtutis_ rune for offensive purposes. So, what changed?”

“I don’t know,” Alec answered. “But I think it’s because of Jace. He is not... a normal Shadowhunter, so it might affect the _Virtutis_ rune in ways that we can’t imagine”

“Not a normal Shadowhunter? I’m not sure what you mean-” The words were halted when suddenly, Edward raised his hand to clutch tightly at his heart. The warlock’s whole body went rigid as his eyes were shut down and his breaths started to sound ragged.  

“Edward?” Alec frowned. When he saw Edward was not responding, Alec hastily left his seat to kneel in front of the seated warlock. When Alec looked up, he was concern at the way Edward’s face was turning pale and sweating like he was in a great deal of pain. “Edward, are you alright?”

And what he saw next was completely horrifying.

It was nothing like he had ever seen before. One moment Alec saw Edward’s face freeze and remain unresponsive no matter how many times Alec called him and the next thing he knew, Edward’s face distorted in some sort of magical effect and it was _morphed into another face_. The transformation was so grotesque to watch that surely the source of this magic was evil. From the look of pure agony in Edward’s face before it changed, it was clear that Edward wasn’t a willing participant.

This unexpected change caused Alec to jerk back on his feet and retreated his steps, away from Edward, in absolute shock. His heart pounded loudly when he saw Edward was slowly looking up with a new face. But, what was more shocking was the fact that the face that Edward wore right now _was not unfamiliar_. Oh, not at all. Alec had seen that face countless times before. With those icy, soulless blue eyes, pasty-white skin and shocking black hair, Alec knew precisely who that was.

It was the man in his vision. It was the man who tried to summon the creature... The man that none of them could find any of his record. All they had was a face and nothing more.

 _Oh Angels… what is happening?_ Alec thought in panic. _What the HELL is happening?!_

The man slowly stood up and that caused Alec to backtrack slowly towards the bookshelf behind him, knowing for certain that in the drawer contained his spare _stele._ Words were stuck at his throat and cold sweat broke at the back of his neck at this unexpected and horrifying turn of event.

“There’s nothing in the world that I hate more than a _Virtutis_ pair,” Edward-not-Edward spoke up deliberately. His usual smooth and collected tone was now sounded deep and silky; it was so different than Edward’s usual warm tone. “The Angels are so troublesome.”

Alec’s eyes were impossibly wide. The tone and the stance of Edward’s voice and the mannerism were completely different than the ones that Alec was used to expect from Edward. But did he expect? This unknown person was not the gentle Edward he knew! His back hit the shelf and Alec blindly reached back, grasping for his _stele._

“Who… who are you?” Alec stammered.

“Don’t you recognise me, Shadowhunter?” The warlock smirked. “Being a _Receptorem_ , I’m sure the Angels have shown you about me in those pesky visions.” With a mocked bow, he continued, “ _I am Samuel_.”

The announcement shocked Alec to the core because he finally knew the man that he saw in the visions was Samuel. He should have shown the drawing of the man to Edward! Edward would have been able to identify the man for him. He was so stupid! “But that’s impossible!” Alec breathed. “Samuel is dead. He’s been dead for a long time. Edward told me he saw you die! How could you be here, possessing him?”

“Possess? I'm not a ghost nor a demon. What you see here is simply a magic spell. Edward is a weakling warlock! He wouldn’t know an ancient spell even if it hit him. Well, it did hit him.” Samuel laughed at his own joke. “I survived, Shadowhunter, through magic as dark as the deepest part of hell and as old as the Earth itself. My body may have perished a long time ago, but the spell that I used allowed me to attach my soul to my magic and that day, before I threw myself over the ledge, I infected every warlock in the warzone with my magic. As long as they are alive, I live inside their magical vein like a parasite, taking over their actions while they were sleeping as I was await for my opportunity.”

Alec’s fingers touched the tip of his _stele_ and he firmly grabbed it within his hand. He had no plan just yet. “An opportunity for what?”

“You see, fragments of my magic lived inside of all the warlocks that day. For each warlock that died, that fragment would be transferred to another living warlock until it accumulated in the last living warlock and when it did, it gave me the opportunity to overtake him and rebirth myself. Now, after a hundred years living inside Edward, I am whole once again.” Samuel raised his hand, flexing his fingers in fascination. “The spell works wonder even if it took me a thousand years.”

Samuel turned to look at Alec, his lips crooked into a mocking smile. “Edward is quite fond of you, you know.” He tapped a finger against his temple. “But poor him, trap inside in a body he can’t control because it is not his anymore. But don’t worry, soon his soul will be crushed by mine and you don’t have to worry about his eternal suffering.”

Alec maintained his hard stare at Samuel, thinking furiously of a plan. It was kind of hard to be clever when he was being blindsided like this.  But, by the Angels, _poor Edward_ … being the last warlock alive from the war with Samuel caused him to be the unlucky one to have Samuel inside him. Alec recalled Edward saying how his close friend spent the last few years of his life acting strange - that must be because of the Samuel’s manifestation that drove Edward’s friend to act like that. _There's must be a way for us to save Edward._ Alec thought. _He doesn’t deserve this._ But he couldn't help but think that it might be too late for Edward. The _stele_ within his hand creaked in anger.

“Why did you show yourself to me now after all those years scheming?” Alec snarled. “What is it that you are planning?!”

Samuel took steps forward leisurely as if he had all the time in the world. “I wasn't planning to. I was content waiting until Edward asleep as I took over his body to prepare for my summoning circles. Collecting demon’s ichor took a long time, you know. But when Edward came to see you, pouring his heart out, and you telling him about your _Virtutis_ experiment, it made me so angry. How dare the Angels sent another of their _Virtutis_ pair with an improved rune!” The icy blue eyes seemed to burn with cold fire. Alec had never seen demonic eyes like that. “When I learned that your _Virtutis_ rune can be used as offensive rune and not just defensive, I knew that I couldn't take any chance by letting you discover the full potential of the rune. So, I figured that this time is as good as any. It should be so easy to kill you, Shadowhunter, especially when you are already too weak from today's experiment.”

Alec clenched his hands. He needed to alert Jace. Silently, he used the _stele_ to burn his wrist until blood dripped. The more pain he was in, the faster Jace would be alerted. Samuel was stupid to try this within the parameter of the Institute. Or maybe, the warlock was just that cocky. Now, he needed to stall. “It's that why I was able to get through the warded cave? Because you used Edward’s magic to put up ward and Edward was the one who provided me the portal, so, the ward allowed me through.”

“I admit that Edward falling for you - a _Receptorem -_ was not what I expected. Only a _Receptorem_ can redirect the portal to a location of his vision.” Samuel said.

Okay… Alec didn’t know that. He needed a manual for this.

The warlock continued, “Of all the people in the world, what are the odds of _that_ happening? So, when I knew that my summoning circle was breached and now guarded by the soldiers of the Clave, I went ahead and drew a second summoning circle in some unknown place or maybe a third, who knows. You have no idea of how many lesser demons I have killed to draw that all those circles.”

More summoning circles? Alec though in disbelief. Suddenly all those urgent visions that the Angels gave him after he received the _Virtutis_ rune - the ones that made Magnus angry because it kept showing the same vision again and again were maybe not useless. Maybe the Angels were trying to tell him that there were more summoning circles that he needed to be aware about. Oh, damn it… Why didn’t he think of drawing those visions?! Just because it showed a summoning ritual in a cave, it didn’t mean it was the same cave!

Oblivious to Alec’s internal turmoil, Samuel walked and halted right in front of Alec, causing Alec to look up defiantly at the tall warlock. His racing mind stopped at the sight of Samuel standing so close to him. Something unpleasant shivered up Alec’s spine at the way those eyes raked his body - sinisterly considering. Suddenly, the warlock raised a hand to caress Alec’s cheekbone softly, causing Alec to jerk his head back in utter shock. The warlock smirked at Alec’s reaction. “You _are_ a pretty one. I can see why Edward is enthralled. You know, during all those years I was with him, he always had such an impeccable taste in everything, especially in lovers. You’re by far the prettiest choice he had made.”

“But-” Samuel continued, putting down his hand - much to Alec’s relief. “Lucky for you, I have much more important things to do than playing with you, as tempting as it is.”

Alec scoffed, putting up a brave face even though deep down inside, he knew he was so out of his depth. Samuel’s touch felt so repulsive, so, he hid behind his sarcasm. “Important thing? Like what? Summoning a creature to kill all Shadowhunters?”

Samuel threw his head back and laughed. “What? Is that what you think the creature is? All those years and the Clave still does not know what the creature is? Or is it because they don’t care to find out? That sounds incredibly incompetent, if you asked me, but I’ll do you a favour. I’ll tell you because you’ll not be alive to tell your beloved Clave. I’m summoning the end-of-the-world creature. The creature heralded since the beginning of the time that will destroy everything when the end comes. But you see, I don’t want to wait until the end of time. I want it to happen right now. And it’s not just the Shadowhunters, I want to kill everything that breathes and moves. I want to destroy every creature so that Earth can breathe again without pests crawling all over her.”

Alec was so stupefied at this revelation. This was too much to swallow. “W- Why…?” He breathed. “What could you possibly gain?”

The smile on Samuel’s face hardened. “I made a deal with my father - he gave me the mean and the knowledge to take my revenge on the world who had been so unjustly vicious to me and I shall give him an empty Earth for the demons to roam and him to rule. A fair exchange, don’t you think?”

Alec couldn't believe his ears. Of all the inane reasons to commit worldwide genocide, this was the pettiest one. “The world is unjustly vicious to everyone!” Alec snapped, this revelation mind-boggled him. “To destroy all living things just because you couldn’t man up and face the reality of life is like a toddler throwing tantrum for not getting what he wanted!!!”  

Samuel snarled as he snapped, reaching for Alec’s neck to lift and slamming the Shadowhunter against the shelf. _By God…_ Alec gasped. _He is so strong!_ The shelf dug at his back painfully and his _stele_ was accidentally drop on the floor from the force. Samuel pressed on Alec’s neck, causing the archer to wheeze and gasp as he clawed futilely the hand around his neck.

The warlock brought his face close to Alec. “You have no idea the path that I took to be the man that I am right now! The torture, the taunts and the suffering that I was inflicted for years and years just because I am a warlock are incomparable to your measly, fleeting life.” Samuel hissed - insanity burned in those eyes and Alec knew that nothing that could be said that could get through him. “I am justified to take my revenge. I am _due_ for the debt the world owes me. Don’t you, for a second, think that I feel any remorse for what I am about to do.” His hand closed tighter around Alec’s neck.

Spots appeared at the edges of Alec’s eyes as he struggled to draw in his breath. He could feel his attempts to get Samuel's hands off his neck halted and his already weakened constitution was not helping the matter at all. His hands dropped to his sides.

Samuel smirked when he saw Alec’s eyes started to droop. The hazel eyes were clouded and his red lips hang open slightly. It was really a pity, Samuel thought once again, because Alexander Lightwood was really pretty. It could just be the remnant of Edward's consciousness that influenced his thought like this but frankly, Samuel didn't give a damn. As far as he was concern, Edward was no longer in control. So, without loosening his grip, the warlock leaned forward. “I think Edward will thank me for this final parting gift,” he whispered before capturing Alec’s lips with his own and stole the lasts of Alec’s breaths.

To say Alec was shocked at that unexpected violation was an understatement but it jerked him out of his dying stupor. Adrenaline rush quickly poured through his veins. There was no way he would allow himself to die, not after he and Magnus had just found their way back to each other. So, in his last attempt, Alec moved his hand about once again and his fingers touched the scattered pens on the surface of the shelf from when Samuel slammed him to the fittings. Acting on his survival instinct and using the last of his strength, Alec bit down Samuel’s lips, hurting both his and Samuel’s lips in his hastiness before quickly raising his hand, pen within his grasp, and then, he plunged it as deeply as he could on Samuel's neck. That caused Samuel to howl as he tore his bleeding lips away from Alec’s equally bleeding ones. His hands let go of Alec’s neck to grasp blindly for the pen stuck out from his neck. Blood gushed out of the wound when he pulled the pen out - blue magic glowed in an attempt to close the wound.

Alec dropped to his knees, grabbing the _stele_ on the floor before crawling his way away from Samuel. He felt lightheaded for the lack of oxygen, his vision was blurry and his heart pounded painfully in his chest. He needed to get away from here, so, he shakily drew the _Stamina_ rune on his arm and he inhaled sharply at the feeling of energy surge shocked his body. Feeling stronger, Alec got on his feet and stumbled toward the door.

His hand was on the doorknob when he felt an electrical static wrapped around his feet and yanked him back. Alec gasped in surprise as he fell downwards to his chest, barely bracing himself with his hands.

“You are one troublesome Shadowhunter!” Samuel hissed. “Just where do you think you're going?” His neck wound was partially closed by healing magic using one hand while the other one glowed in menacing red energy, pointed towards Alec. Alec had never seen a warlock used defensive and offensive magic simultaneously like that. He faintly wondered where Samuel got that much of power.

Alec couldn't move his legs and no matter how he struggled, there was no escaping this magical bind. His mind raced. _Where the hell is Jace? He should've been here fifteen minutes ago!_ Then, his eyes went wide when he saw Samuel levitate a long metal rod, realising that it was taken from his window sills, and pointed it straight to Alec.

 _Fuck._ Alec was so screwed!

Without any word, Samuel waved his hand and the metal rod shot through the air. Alec was helpless to do anything else except raising his hand to stop the rod from piercing his chest. Alec cried in pain as the rod protruded out of his palm, blood gushing out from the gaping wound.

Samuel snarled when he saw this, and he flung Alec to the middle of the office space in frustration. Alec curled his body in pain.

Then, everything happened at once. As Samuel prepared to deal with the death blow to Alec, Alec’s eyes were suddenly clenched tight at the arrival of a vision. _Damn it! Why does it always have to come at such an inconvenience time?!_ The pain in his hand had vanished as it was totally overshadowed by the crippling pain that always came with the vision. Resigning to the fact that vision would not let up anytime soon, Alec tried his hardest to set aside the vision at the moment in favour of this dire circumstance that he was currently in.

Ever since he had the _Virtutis_ rune, he was no longer totally consumed by the vision as he was now more aware of his surroundings. It required an absolute control and the highest threshold of pain to switch back and forth from the vision to his current surroundings. He didn't always succeed but there were times where he could if he found motivation strong enough.  

This was one of those moments where he couldn’t afford to let vision overtake his consciousness - not if Alec wanted to stay alive.

With all his might, Alec forced the vision at the back of his head, vaguely aware the usual nosebleed that accompanied with the vision, as he tried to focus on Samuel. The vision bleed through the mental block that he put up, but Alec stubbornly held on. From where he was lying, he could see Samuel’s eyes narrowed at the sudden change in him as he was clearly straining against some kind of force.

The warlock didn't want to take any more chances and he began to gather magic in both of his hands. He didn't know what was happening right now with Alec - why did blood rush out of his nose and why Alec looked like he was so much in pain - and he didn't want to stick around any longer than he had to. Then, everything went silent when both of them heard the thundering sound of multiple footsteps running towards Alec’s office.

 _Oh… thank Angels!_ Alec could have cried in utter relief.

“That would be my _parabatai…”_ Alec croaked, using his non-injured hand to wipe the nosebleed away. _Oh God._.. This vision was going to kill him faster than Samuel and wouldn’t that be ironic. “I don't think you would have enough time to kill me and _then,_ portal your way out of here.

Samuel gritted his teeth in frustration as he hesitated and weighed his options. He had so much to accomplish and he didn’t want to waste his magic fighting Shadowhunters in their turf. So, he withdrew his magic and conjured up a portal. He knew that the Institute portal ward only prevented the outsiders to come in, but not to go out. “You win this time, Alexander.” The name came out in almost caressing manner, which caused Alec to shiver again in revulsion. “But it makes no different because I just need to kill one of you to stop the _Virtutis_ rune from activating.”

The threat washed over Alec like burning acid. “You will not touch my _parabatai_ ,” Alec said threateningly but in reality? It was hard to look menacing when blood was pouring out of his nose and a steel rod stuck out of his hand. There was nothing he could do at the moment.

Samuel just laughed as he stepped inside his portal and vanished.

A second later, his office’s door was being slammed open. Alec nearly groaned in utter relief to see Magnus rushing in, followed by Jace. He vaguely heard Magnus calling his name; he vaguely felt Jace scolding him as the blond Shadowhunter pulled his _parabatai’s_ collar down to press his hand on the rune. Alec had never been so relief to have the _Virtutis_ rune activated - the pain was already too much for him to handle on the normal day. Combined with the aches in his body and hand, Alec accepted the energy that Jace shared like a man gulping water after days wandering in the desert.

Isabelle bit her lips as she looked at the haphazard state that Alec’s office was in. A window was broken with one of its iron sills missing. The bookshelf was cracked and the books were thrown around messily on the floor. On the floor were two puddle of blood, one near Alec and the other one near the bookshelf. Something serious had happened but how could it be? They were in the Institute. This was supposed to be the safest place anyone of them could be. The intruder couldn’t have portaled in, with all the wards that Magnus had installed frequently, so, he or she must have been invited in.

At the sound of Jace’s groan when he finally pulled away his hand from Alec brought Isabelle out of her musing. She stood at her place, watching Magnus finish up his healing on Alec’s hand until there was no more gory hole in her brother’s palm as Magnus magic closed up the wound gently. The vision had left Alec looking even paler.

“Alexander, how are you feeling?” Magnus asked softly. “Do you feel pain anywhere else?”

Alec could barely keep his eyes open. But he found the remnant of his strength to shake his head. The _Stamina_ rune that he applied earlier on had lost its effect. “No, I’m fine,” he rasped. “It’s Edward…” Alec tried to stand up, but Magnus and Jace were having none of it.

“Alec, you need to take a breather,” Jace said sharply. “Magnus just pulled a freaking iron rod from your hand and you just have had a vision.”

Alec shook his head harder. His tried to stand up again but his knees were trembling badly. _Blood loss._ He thought faintly. Looking at Jace, he tried again. “No, you don’t understand. The person that I keep seeing in the visions…. He took over Edward.”

Magnus frowned. “Who took over Edward? What do you mean?”

“Edward came to see me and while we were talking about the experiment that we did this morning, Edward turned into someone else - his face literally change into the man that I saw in my vision. It is Samuel,” Alec said urgently. By the Angels, his head was spinning that he could barely keep himself upright.

Alec knew he was losing the fight to keep awake.

“What?!” Magnus and Jace cried simultaneously while Isabelle and Clary looked stunned.

Alec wanted to tell his friends more. He had so much more to tell them - especially what he saw in his recent vision. But the buzzing in his head was getting louder and he could practically feel the blood rushing away from his head. Without warning, Alec keeled forward and fainted in Magnus’s lap.

“Alec!” Isabelle cried.

* * * * * *

“The Silent Brothers have found a very old record of the beast you saw in your visions,” Imogen’s voice sounded grim even through the video camera. “It’s lucky for the Silent Brothers to even find it.”

Alec was seated in his customary Head of Institute’s seat, with Lydia on his side and the rest of his friends hovering behind him. Even Magnus. He had finished briefing Inquisitor Herondale about Samuel’s unexpected visit yesterday and his intention of summoning a creature with an ability to wipe off the entire living things on the Earth. The Clave’s aghast reaction this new threat was prominent enough that Imogen didn’t even comment on Magnus’s presence in the official Clave briefing.

Speaking of Magnus, after Alec was attacked, his protectiveness grew even worse. He had refused to even go back to his loft as he was adamant in keeping Alec company. He had retorted the lines of how Alec was attracting troubles like no one, _even Jace_ , and that was frankly quite insulting because Alec had no control whatsoever of the things that kept happening to him lately. Jace, on the other hand, _looked_ for trouble. It was really an unfair comparison.

“The creature is called _Anzu_ as the ancient people of Sumerian called it. They were the only people who had any record of this creature - so fanciful that it sounds too fantastical to believe. According to the record, the creature’s enormous wings are supposedly powerful enough to create huge storms and walls of fire that can certainly decimate the lives as we know it. The record may be wrong but _Anzu_ resides in a lost dimension where it said the ancient gods once were.” Imogen furrowed her eyebrows in worry. “But to be able to summon this kind of ancient creature requires enormous and unimaginable magic. I don’t believe Samuel can do this on his own.”

Alec sighed. “No, he is not alone. The Angels showed me that he indeed has had help in his previous attempt and I have no doubt that he has the same help this time around.”

“What do you mean, Alec?” Imogen asked.

“In the vision I received yesterday, the Angels showed me that Samuel’s father is the Greater Demon Sammael.”

“What?” Magnus exclaimed, totally in shock, and it was echoed by others as well.

“Sammael? The demon who caused The Incursion?” Imogen asked incredulously. “But he was banished a very long time ago. If that is true, then Samuel must have been more than a thousand years old, perhaps predating even the first generation of the Shadowhunters!”

“That warlock sure can hold a grudge…” Jace muttered under his breath and Alec’s mouth twitched in involuntary amusement.

“He failed in his attempt during The Incursion. Sammael’s desire to assimilate the demon’s world with human’s world is widely known. So it makes sense to assume that he would want to try infiltrating the human world once again. And this time, he does it by using his own son’s acute sense of retribution to the humans who had wronged him.” Alec sighed as he rubbed his forehead in one-part frustration and another part of lingering headache that never seemed to completely go away. “The Angels showed me that Samuel received his father’s power and the knowledge on how to access the long-forgotten dimension of the ancient gods. If _Anzu_ were to let loose, there was nothing on this Earth that can stop it from flapping its wings and start the end of the world.”

The room was as silent as death.

Suddenly, the camera on Imogen’s side faltered and a second later, Consul Jia Penhallow appeared. Her expression was as hard as a granite. “The Clave blames the warlock community for letting a rogue warlock like Samuel does as he pleases.”

Magnus bristled at the sudden accusation but kept his mouth shut. There was no way he would do anything to undermine the authority of either Lydia of Alec.

“Consul Penhallow,” Lydia protested. “The New York warlock community is not to be blamed! No one knows about his existence until last month. It is unfair to judge the whole community.”

“Blame must be borne, Miss Branwell,” she said coldly. “We may have guarded the cave where the rift is supposedly to be opened but who knows how many summoning circles that Samuel has drawn. We can’t send every Shadowhunters scouring every inch of New York looking for Samuel’s other summoning circles!”

“Then, I will call on the Downworlders’ Council, asking for their help.” Lydia countered. “Blame should only be borne if the guilt is assured.”

“Prove me wrong, Miss Branwell.” Consul Penhallow said. “Call on your Downworlders’ Council and prove to me that the warlocks are willing to bear some of this burden. It is, after all, caused by one of their own. Until then, any further diplomatic relationship between us is stalled.”

The camera tilted and Imogen came to view once again. With a slight apologetic tone her voice, she said, “Until then, Shadowhunters, and please…” her eyes imperceptibly swept to the left, where Jia sat. “...tread this carefully. Do not aggravate the fragile truce.”

The camera went dark.

“What does she mean by that?” Jace retorted.

Isabelle, who was always the clever one amongst the three Lightwoods, swallowed hard before saying, “I think she means that Consul Penhallow doesn’t want Shadowhunters to be helping the Downworlders if the Downworlders are not willing to do the same.”

“Well, that is stupid!” Jace snapped. “Because _Anzu_ doesn’t care about Shadowhunters or Downworlders. One flap of its massive wings, everybody dies!”

Magnus tightened his lips into a straight, thin line in utter displeasure. “For as long as I live, the Clave is not a rational decision-maker.”

“It’s the fear, Magnus.” Clary said. “When you think about it, if the Downworlders came together and fought against the Clave, you guys can have a real chance of massacring all of us.”

“Clary,” Alec cut in his quiet tone. “You’re not helping. And having said that, I think that if the Clave knew about the _Anima_ rune, I don’t think they would be pleased. The thought of bonding a Shadowhunter to a Downworlder will certainly bring down the wrath of the Clave upon us.”

“I hate to say it, but I agree with Alec,” Lydia said helplessly. “If you drew an unsanctioned rune that none of us knows the consequences of it, the Clave will be furious.”

Magnus gaped. He couldn’t believe they were having this conversation again! “Alec needs this rune. It’s not even a choice!”

Jace was equally furious. “Alec, don’t tell me you’re changing your mind!”   

Alec bit his lips in contemplation. Truthfully? It was not himself that he was worried about; his concern was mainly for Magnus. He didn’t like the thought of Magnus getting into trouble with the Clave. “Guys…” Alec said eventually. “Can I have a private conversation with Jace and Magnus about this?”

Isabelle took Clary and Lydia’s hands to drag the girls out of the office despite Clary’s obvious reluctance. Just before she closed the door, she looked straight at Alec. “If you do anything stupid, Alec, I will make your life miserable.”

The threat didn’t sound empty.

Alec looked after the closed door for a few moments, searching for suitable words to articulate his concern, before looking at both of them. Jace had his arms crossed over his chest, challenging Alec to say anything stupid while Magnus had his elegant fingers tapped on his chin. Both of them were waiting for Alec to say what they knew Alec would say just so they could refute him.

Alec sighed. “Look, I don’t want Magnus to be a target for the Clave. Clearly, the Clave is looking for someone to blame and seeing Magnus is already the High Warlock of Brooklyn, drawing this rune on you may be the only thing the Clave needed to pin this whole thing on you.”

“Alec, you can’t be serious!” Jace said impatiently. “Politics aside, may I remind you that you will die without this rune. Plus, this rune is the proof that the Angels will this to happen. The Clave can’t begrudge you and Magnus for what is clearly Angels’ will!”

“I know, I know.” Alec said. “But Magnus could lose his position as a High Warlock because of this and I...”

Magnus scoffed out an incredulous laugh as he cut in Alec’s words. “Do you really think I care about that anymore?”

Jace pulled out his own _stele_. “No more stalling, Alec. Is this why you refuse to have this rune drawn yesterday?” He said. “You know that you can’t save everyone and you need to get into that thick skull of yours that we want to do this. We _need_ to do this. You need to learn to demand something for yourself in return. Be selfish for once!”

Alec looked at Jace and then, at Magnus. The warlock kept his intense eyes on Alec, demanding silently for Alec to do what Jace asked of him because couldn’t Alec understand how important he was to both of them? Jace might hold Alec’s soul but Magnus needed Alec’s heart beating close to him every day and every night. The day Alec’s heart stopped beating, Magnus’s heart would to, not a second later.

“Well, if you’re sure…” Alec trailed off. He still hated the fact that Magnus could be vindicated for having this rune, but Jace made a compelling argument.

“Alec, you are unbelievable!” Jace huffed. “So, where do you want to draw this?”

Alec hesitated for a while. “Shouldn’t we call Izzy and Clary back first?

Jace didn’t hesitate as he rushed out of the room and came back two minutes later with Isabelle and Clary in tow. Clearly, both women didn’t wander far at all. Looking at four pair of eyes watching him back intently, waiting for him to allow the rune to be drawn, Alec knew he couldn’t postpone this any longer. He just wished the outcome of this blatant disregard of Counsel Penhallow’s words would not bite Magnus back in ass. Finally he said, “Clary said that this rune doesn’t require Magnus to press his hand on me like the _Virtutis_ rune but the closer the rune is to the heart, the better it would work.”

Clary beamed at Alec and Isabelle whooped.

Magnus let out a relief sigh. “Then, it settles. We draw the _Anima_ rune on our heart. Jace, do Alec first, in case he decides to change his mind.”

“Hey, my concern is valid!” Alec retorted as he unbuttoned his shirt. Magnus rolled his eyes as he undid his own shirt’s buttons as well.

“Your concern is valid everywhere, Alec,” Jace muttered.

Jace urged Alec to stand up and the tall Shadowhunter did. With his fingers poised on Alec’s chest, Jace looked thoughtful for a while before grinning cheekily. “You know, binding your souls to each other sounds an awful lot like a wedding.”

Isabelle gasped, “Oh my God, Jace, you’re right!!!”

“So, Alec…” Jace said with insufferable smirk on his face. “Any wedding vow that you need to say before I draw this?”

Alec gaped his _parabatai’s_ audacity before blushing profusely. “Shut up, Jace.” He muttered. “It’s just a rune…”

Jace chuckled loudly, taking pity at Alec. “Clary, would you mind showing me the _Anima_ rune once again?” And he began drawing the rune after Clary drew the rune in the air.

Magnus looked at the _parabatai_ pair in deep amusement. And really, Jace wasn’t wrong. A rune that bound two souls throughout eternity did sound like a marriage. But it was better than marriage vow that any race of any culture could ever give them. For better or worse, Magnus was _indeed_ married to Alec, heart and soul. Suddenly, his heart ached. He wished that he could give Alec a better wedding setting. He wished he could have proposed Alec in an elaborate manner and watch the beloved flushes to rise on his cheeks. He wished that they had agreed to take this rune for a reason other than trying to save Alec’s life.

As Magnus watched _Anima_ rune hiss and burn on Alec’s skin, he made his own vow to do all of the above when all this was over. Alec deserved to be married surrounded by the people he loved in a setting that was so lovely and unforgettable, and not being bound to Magnus in this dreary room with only Jace’s jokes to lighten the atmosphere up. His heart quickened at the thought of marrying the man that he loved to distraction. For a man who had managed to avoid marriage for more than 400 years, it was so surprising to feel this excited. It wasn’t until Jace mentioned this that Magnus realised just how much he wanted to be married to this self-sacrificing Shadowhunter with heart as big as the universe itself.

“Magnus, you’re up,” Jace said, shaking Magnus from his reverie.

“Are you okay?” Alec asked tentatively; afraid that Magnus might have a second thought.

Magnus smiled at Alec; he wondered at the way Alec was always attuned to his mood. He wanted this open and honest face to be the one he saw every morning when he woke up. He wanted Alec next to him until the end of their life.

And instantly, the future didn’t seem so bleak and lonely anymore.

“Never better, darling. Come on, Jace,” he motioned Jace to come closer as he pulled his shirt open to bare his pristine chest.    

“Well, you too, Magnus?” Jace teased. “No wedding vows?”

Magnus smirked. “Reciting wedding vows in this tasteless room? Jace, have you met me? There is no way I’m marrying Alec without the whole nine yards.”

Jace gaped at Magnus before finally, throwing his head back, laughing. Alec’s eyes were wide at Magnus’s words.

Magnus smiled at the flush he saw rising on Alec’s cheeks, noticing that Alec wasn’t exactly adverse to his subtle intention.

                                                   

 

 


	11. Brace yourself for the ascension towards the heaven

_______________

_Take the life that you're so willingly sacrificed to me,_

_For I am the one who needs it more than others;_

_Give your heart that is so carelessly cared for to me,_

_For I am the keeper, the caretaker and the protector._

_______________

“Do you feel any different, Alexander?” Magnus asked as they settled in for the night.

“Hm?” Alec asked as he slipped under the sheet. This was the first night Alec would spend in Magnus’s loft after six months being apart. When Magnus asked if Alec would like to come back with him to his loft, Alec hesitated so briefly before agreeing. His fleeting reluctance was not because of Magnus but it was because of his fear that their time apart would make everything awkward. And apparently, it did because when they were readying themselves for bed, Alec had nervously waited for Magnus to finish whatever he was doing in the bathroom before he could get in. He had never cared about sharing the bathroom with Magnus before all this.

Six months of separation was quite a long time to cause the ease of familiarity between them to become rustic. Magnus kept on bumping on him and Alec kept on thinking he was invading Magnus’s space. Alec kept on asking for permission and Magnus kept on asking if Alec was comfortable. They might have come together again, but the sense of security would take months to rebuild. And Alec wondered whether his decision to come spending the night in Magnus’s loft tonight was too soon.

“Different?” Alec tried again. “You mean about the _Anima_ rune? I don’t think so. But then, Jace just drew the rune yesterday, so, the effect could take some time, if there’s any.”

Magnus lie next to Alec, facing each other. There was a space between them; the lingering awkwardness that neither of them could admit nor dispel. Magnus was painfully aware of this and he didn’t know how to approach this.

But then, Magnus knew that there was no way except to talk about this. So, taking a deep breath, Magnus said, “No, I’m not talking about the rune.”

“Then, what?”

Magnus studied the man before him. The dim light of his room provided a romantic view of Alec as dark shadows accentuated his sharp cheekbones and full lips. His usual soft, hazel eyes were darkened into almost black. Alec wore a loose t-shirt and a long cotton pants whereas before, Alec used to feel comfortable sleeping shirtless with him. Throughout the evening, he was careful in his movements as if there was an uncomfortable distance between them that Alec couldn’t quite cross over and frankly, it was starting to scare Magnus.

Magnus slowly reached out his hand to gently caress the beckoning cheekbone. “I meant, with me. Do you feel any different with me now as compared to before we drifted apart?” He said softly.

“Before we-?” Alec halted and then, frowned. “I- I don’t know what you mean.”

The hand that caressed Alec’s cheek, slid downwards softly to touch the hem of Alec’s t-shirt neckline. Magnus kept his eyes steady on Alec’s, willing the Shadowhunters to understand him. “You have never worn a t-shirt to our bed before.”

 _Oh.._ Alec swallowed hard as he began to understand. He didn't think Magnus would notice, not this soon. Alec didn’t know why it should come as a surprise. Magnus had always had this uncanny ability of seeing everything hidden in him even when the people closest to him didn’t.

“You’ve never cared waiting for me to finish with my things in the bathroom before you use it,” Magnus continued in his hushed tone; patient but still wanting desperately to understand this. “And we’ve never lain with this much of a space between us before.”

“Magnus, I…” Alec trailed off. He didn’t know what to say. How could he explain these feelings of awkwardness and nervousness that he had ever since he stepped into Magnus’s loft? That he felt like an unwanted foreigner in an unknown country with a series of unknown laws. He didn’t think everything that he had known about them was valid anymore.

“Angel, I didn’t mean to push you,” Magnus said a few moments later when he realised Alec couldn't continue his words. “And I know that it’s going to take some time before we can figure everything out. But, this is our first night together in six months and I don’t want any misunderstanding to linger between us.”

The uncertainty in Magnus’s face was clear, and Alec didn’t like that; didn't like to see Magnus upset, so, he pushed aside his ever-presence reservation and spoke up haltingly. “It’s not that… It’s just that I- I don’t know where the lines are. I still haven’t learnt them, and I don’t want to overstep my boundaries.”

“Lines? Boundaries?” Magnus frowned; trepidation grew within him uneasily. “What do you mean?”

It was hard to keep his eyes on Magnus’s, especially when the warlock was asking him to be vulnerable. But Magnus always had the knack of pinpointing his weakness and bringing out the vulnerability in him even when he thought he had put layer upon defensive layer. There was something powerfully magnetic within Magnus that always seemed to be able to pull his deepest self out in the open. And, like a softie that he was, Alec would always allow his defences to be knocked down by Magnus. “I think that it's because I didn’t care about the boundaries before; I mean- _your_ boundaries - that we got into the mess that we were in. I know you said that you would never hurt me that way again and I thought that I should- I _need-,_ ” Alec corrected himself, “-to play my part better in return and… you know… mind the lines that I shouldn’t cross.”

Magnus didn't like where Alec was going with this. “What lines did you think you’ve crossed?”

“Uh.. compromising the safety of your people…? Keeping secrets from you…?” Alec answered, evidently unsure himself. _Assuming that you are mine to protect when you don’t need it. Assuming that what we have is unchangeable when you are an immortal warlock. Assuming that there are no uncrossable lines between us when we barely know each other._ Alec swallowed those words down and deep inside of him so that Magnus could never find it. Ever.

Alec hastily continued, “I mean those are the lines that I know I will never overstep again but I’m sure there’s more and honestly, I am out of my depth.”

Magnus drew in his breath sharply. Oh, why did it hurt to see Alec being so cautious around him, tiptoeing his ways around Magnus’s life? Was it because it reminded him of their early stage of relationship? Alec was so uncomfortable with himself and unsure of Magnus’s feelings towards him back then. And now, Alec was back into that stage and it was all his… fault.

The warlock breathed out in sadness as comprehension dawned upon him. Silently, he berated himself for making Alec feel insecure around him but what was done was done. Now, he needed to carefully rearrange his words to rectify this situation. He wanted Alec to feel safe with him; physically and emotionally, like he did, before all went to hell. The warlock raised his hand and placed it gently onto Alec’s chest. He could feel the faint ridges of the _Anima_ rune scar under Alec’s thin t-shirt and felt his own heart quicken unfailingly in quiet happiness every time he traced the rune, knowing he had the matching rune on his own chest.

“Tell me, Alexander,” Magnus began gently. “What do I have here?”

A pair of dark eyebrows furrowed together. “The… _Anima_ rune…?”

“It is a soul rune that binds us throughout eternity; regardless of whatever boundaries that either of us will cross and _will forgive_ ,” Magnus said in a sure, firm voice. “Alexander, we’ve been apart for six months and this awkwardness between us is bound to take some time until we find the same easy rhythm that we are have shared previously. I have no doubt that now and then we’re going to encounter other things that will cause frictions between us. But, angel…”

Magnus raised his other hand to slide across Alec’s cheek before lovingly caressing the dark circle under Alec’s tired eyes. The pair of brownish green eyes that stared back at him were filled with such vulnerability that Magnus wanted nothing more than to gather him in his arms, loving this man so thoroughly until there were no doubt left between them. “...I want you to know that it’s okay,” Magnus emphasised. “Whatever misunderstanding or discontent that we’ll face in the future, we will be okay because I have made a promise to you that I’ll never leave you again. _I cannot survive it._ ”

Alec covered Magnus’s hand on his chest, tightening his grip. Magnus’s words gave him strength to say what was in his heart. “Magnus, I know that. But I- I don't know why I kept on waiting for the other shoe to drop all night,” he confessed. “I’ve never felt this _untethered_ with you before; not even when we were arguing. By the Angels, I don’t want to do anything that will drive you away.”

“No shoe will ever be dropped, you hear me? And nothing you’ll do will drive me away,” Magnus said with an ironclad conviction. His eyes bore into Alec’s, pouring his earnestness out so that Alec would understand.

“I am yours, Alexander, for _eternity_.”

Alec looked into Magnus’s slanted, dark eyes for any sign of regret of the choice he made when he accepted the _Anima_ rune. Nephilim loved once and fiercely that they couldn’t comprehend of the notion of moving on after losing their only love. Magnus, on the hand, was a warlock; a being of immortal life with a string of replaceable lovers. Alec didn’t begrudge that because he understood it and for that, he never wanted to trap Magnus into the absolute way of a Nephilim’s love if the warlock didn’t wish for it.

As if knowing what Alec was searching for, Magnus simply looked straight back at him, open and certain in his decision that Alec found none of the regret or the hesitation that he feared. So, he gathered his courage to lean slowly forwards, to press his lips on Magnus’s, keenly aware that this was the first kiss that he initiated since they had made up. He moved his lips, brushing against Magnus’s in soft, fluttery movements. Any wariness that had arose vanished into thin air when he felt Magnus slide closer to him in response, eradicating the awkward space between them. Alec’s lips parted in surprise gasp when he felt Magnus’s hand snake down to his waist, encircling it tentatively and then, pulling Alec against him closely.

Within seconds, Alec was sharing the pillow with Magnus and every inch of their bodies was pressed against each other. Magnus was content on letting Alec lead the kiss, enjoying the sweet honey scent of Alec’s skin and the brushes of Alec’s lips against his as the Shadowhunter urged Magnus to part his lips. Magnus complied Alec’s shy request and he deeply groaned when he felt Alec hesitantly taste his mouth. The nervousness in Alec’s kiss was obvious and Magnus pushed down his impatience as he let Alec set his own pace. He told himself that the familiarity that they had lost would not be easily recovered and allowing Alec rediscovering them all over again was a pleasure that Magnus couldn’t deny.

When Alec realised that Magnus was allowing him to lead this kiss, his heart raced, and his cheeks grew warm with need and love. With Magnus’s arms still wrapped around his waist securely, Alec placed his hands on Magnus’s jaws, cradling it gently before he deepened his kiss. The movement was uncoordinated as their noses bumped awkwardly; squishing painfully against each other. At this, Magnus let out a soft chuckle and Alec smiled through his blushes and before he knew it, Magnus nudged his lips, tilting him aside and swooped down to catch his lips in a better angle. What started as a slow and tentative kiss by Alec immediately turned into deep and sensual kiss when Magnus rolled Alec on his back and began to take control.

He couldn't help himself; Alec always had a way of making him lose control. Was it the way Alec always sweetly yielded to him? Was it the way his mesmerising hazel eyes always looked at him with such, naked love? Was it the way Alec sighed with contentment whenever Magnus did something that pleased him? But whatever the reasons were, they were working and now, Magnus couldn't refrain himself from pressing the Shadowhunter underneath him and kissing Alec like there was no tomorrow. It was minutes of unmistakable swipes of tongues, unapologetic nips of teeth and unsuppressed passion. The feel of Alec being so responsive and amenable towards his attention brought Magnus so much joy. Alec made his blood sing loudly.

The kiss ended far too soon to Magnus’s liking but the sight of Alec’s dazed eyes was more than enough to make up for it. The warlock rested his forehead against Alec’s, sharing his breath with him, as he recounted all the blessings that were bestowed upon him. There were times when Magnus kept expecting to be woken up from this dream and be brought back to the dreary reality where Alec was still afraid of him and still out of his reach. The thought made Magnus grip Alec’s waist even tighter.

“I’ve forgotten how good it feels to be so close to you,” Alec said softly; so close were they lying next to each other that his heavy lashes brushed intimately against Magnus’s skin. “You’ve always made me feel safe whenever we lie together like this.”

Something warm and good grew inside Magnus at Alec’s honest words. Alec probably didn’t know the magnitude of those words to Magnus. “Do I, darling?” He asked hoarsely.

Alec nodded and curled even closer to his lover.

“If that is so, then, will you forget about the boundaries?” Magnus implored. “I want nothing more than for you to invade into my life as you did before. Make my space and time as yours once again. Because there is nothing in my life that is not yours - not even my eternity. Please let me be your guarantee once again because if there is anything that is certain in your life, I promise that it will always be me.”

Alec swallowed hard at Magnus’s vow as he closed his eyes. Magnus’s words affected him more than he thought it would. Until those words were uttered, Alec had never realised how much he needed to hear them, and how much Alec craved Magnus’s assurance that nothing was ever lost during the six-month separation.

“Yes… yes, I will.” A vow was spoken in return.

* * * * * *

Despite Jia Penhallow’s subtle threat to let the warlock community handle the Samuel problem on their own, the Clave had still allowed the New York Institute to dispatch several groups of Shadowhunters to scour any imaginable tunnel or underground around New York to search for Samuel’s other summoning circles. Alec suspected that Imogen might have played a large part in persuading Consul Penhallow to lend some manpower from the Clave and for that, he had sent subtle email of gratitude. The search went on for days without any luck even with the help from the warlocks, portalling them everywhere. The atmosphere was tense, and anticipation was building. For each failed search and for each discourage group that returned, more Shadowhunters were beginning to question whether what Alec was seeing in his visions were useful or not.

Or whether they could trust him.

Alec was aware of all that. But it was not as if he could do anything about it. Ever since he received the vision of Greater Demon Sammael in front of Samuel, the Angels didn’t send him any new vision and he couldn't purposely call upon the vision to come to him. This ability was not something he could control; it was only something to be endured. He also knew, the longer the searches took place, the more likely the Shadowhunters and the warlocks alike lost their belief in him.

It frustrated him beyond belief. Maybe searching for the places and waiting for a new vision to come was not the best way. Plus, he was deeply concerned about Edward, hoping so much that the last few days without any success locating Samuel didn’t cost him his chance to try to save Edward. For the first time since this whole thing started, Alec was wishing the vision would come to him, just so he could really look into the vision and see the whereabout of other summoning circles.

“I was thinking,” Alec said one early night, four days after Samuel broke into the Institute, as he was sitting close to Magnus with his head on the warlock’s shoulder. Magnus was sitting on the couch, with a book in his one hand and the other hand wrapped around Alec’s shoulder, playing absentmindedly with the Shadowhunter’s curls at the back of his ear. This was the first night they spent the evening together after three days of Alec accompanying a group of Shadowhunters searching through one after another empty underground spaces.

“Hm..?” Magnus said distractedly.

“I was thinking that perhaps I was going with this the wrong way. Maybe I should go to the first cave where we found Samuel’s summoning circle. Who know? Maybe I can trigger the vision to come to me,” Alec said, trying to hide his anxiety and restlessness.

He felt Magnus’s body tense and watched the warlock carefully putting down his book before turning his body to meet Alec’s face. “Come again?”

Alec pushed his body up and away from Magnus. Now the idea had come to him, he felt energised as words poured out of his mouth non-stop. “The scouting is not working. Three days have passed without any discovery of new summoning sites like Samuel had claimed. It’s not that I can be of any help with any detail of that place since I didn’t really focus on the visions that I have before because I thought the Angels were showing me the same vision over and over again about the first place that we’ve found.  It also means I can’t really draw the place or describe it to the scouting teams. This morning, Lydia implied that they are getting restless and are beginning to question the… validity of my visions and frankly, I don’t blame them. But I can’t force the vision to simply come to me. So, I thought that maybe, if I could go to the first cave, I could, I don’t know, trigger the vision to come to me? Then, maybe I could help the scouting teams to narrow down the search.”

Magnus blinked at the rush of words before pressing his lips in obvious displeasure, “Alexander, need I remind you that the last time you were in that cave, you were bombarded with two visions back to back. It ended you with bleeding ears as well as a headache from hell that I can’t really get rid of,” Magnus said flatly.

Alec paused; he really had forgotten about that. “But the last time it happened, I didn’t have both _Virtutis_ and _Anima_ runes. Maybe this time, it won’t be as bad as the last time.” Alec argued. “I mean, that’s the reason why they are there in the first place, isn’t it? To help me cope with the vision?”

Magnus bit his lips contemplatively before letting out a soft sigh. Alec had a point, but it didn’t mean Magnus was okay with him going back to the accursed place. He still remembered acutely the panic, the rage and the helplessness he felt that day. “Right. You're maybe right. But how can you be sure that the visions will come to you if you go to that place?”

“I don’t, but I touched the circle before the visions came to me that day. I can't be certain whether the visions were triggered by touch but if I remember it right, I was always touching something of relevance before a vision hit me.” Alexander actually raised his fingers to count and Magnus found that to be really adorable. “Edward's card in the first vision, your rings in the second vision, Samuel's summoning circle in third and fourth vision, Jace’s blade in fifth vision and of course, the iron rod that Samuel threw at me triggered the latest vision.”

“What about those relentless visions you received during the Clave investigation?” Magnus asked. “Were you holding or touching anything of significance?”

Alec ran his fingers through his dishevelled hair in frustration. “I don't know. I don't think so. It's not really an exact science, okay, but I got to do something. I just can’t sit around here moping.”

Oh, Alexander’s earnest eyes were killing him here… “Okay, fine,” Magnus relented but his eyes went wide when he saw Alec jump on his feet to get dressed. “Wait! You mean, right now? Tonight?”

Magnus was momentarily distracted by the way Alec’s muscles rippled as the taller man took off his baggy sweater to be replaced with his usual black t-shirt and a pair of black jeans. He couldn’t help but licked his lips at the provocative show Alec unintentionally put on. After their first love making on that unforgettable day when they had made up, they hadn't had the chance to repeat it, not with Samuel still at loose and the Clave breathing down at Alec for the results. Because of this Magnus missed having Alec all by himself for more than just a couple of stolen hours. Unaware of Magnus’s thought, Alec bent down a bit to fasten his thigh holster, jamming his seraph dagger and stele their respective places and sat down to tie up his boots. _Damn it, that thigh holster is going to be a death to me._ Magnus internally groaned.

Alec paused in his actions to look at Magnus, who barely moved from his place. “Um… Yeah, now. I figure that at this early evening, there would only be two Shadowhunters guiding the place - at most - and maybe we could use some privacy. That is, I mean, if you agree,” Alec added hastily when he saw Magnus looking kind of dazed. “Magnus…?”

Magnus breathed out as he tried to catch his bearing once again. “Sure, darling,” Then he stood up and waved his hands to magically change his clothes. “How do you know Jace will be free to come with us?”

“I hope he does,” Alec said as he took out his phone to message Jace.

Ten minutes later, his phone chimed and Jace texted him back to portal to Institute first, so they could go together. When Magnus portalled all three of them back to the cave, Alec gave a sharp nod to the pair of Shadowhunters who were stationed there before entering it.

“I don’t know what you expect to find, coming back here,” Jace remarked as he looked around the cave. The cave was illuminated by several witchlights; placed in strategic places. The last time he was here, he was so consumed with panic that he didn’t really take a good look at the place. “Samuel will not be stupid enough to return.”

Alec walked around the summoning circle, kneeling down as he touched the line. The last time he did this, the vision came to him almost instantaneously. He was hoping that the same thing happened this time but was taken aback at the sliver of disappointment that passed through him when nothing happened. After spending weeks fearing the Angelic visions, Alec never thought he would be praying for them to come. “To be honest, Jace, I don’t know myself. Maybe I am hoping that if I touched this circle, I would get a vision,” Alec sighed as he stood up in disappointment. “Any vision of where Samuel could have hidden his summoning sites.”

Jace frowned. “Do you think you’re up to that? The four-day that you spend vision-free is the healthiest that you’ve ever been since the day you first received the vision.”

Alec bit his lips and slowly got back on his feet. He couldn't argue with that. He did feel stronger and healthier; he didn't feel like keeling over anytime soon. He wondered whether it was because he hadn't been visited by the visions lately or the _Anima_ rune was helping him to recover. He wandered around for a while before stopping to look at Magnus and Jace. “I kept thinking about Edward,” Alec confessed and that got Magnus’s eyebrows to be raised high.

“Edward?” Magnus asked. He willed his heart to stop aching from unnecessary possessiveness.

Alec looked at Magnus. “Yeah… He didn’t deserve what’s happening to him, Magnus. Everything tells me that it’s too late; that there’s nothing I can do to reverse the spell or to save him. Everything tells me that Edward is gone. But I-” Alec halted. He ran his hand through his unruly hair in frustration. “We _owe_ him, Magnus, something. I can’t just leave him in Samuel’s hands. At the very least, I wanted to free Edward from Samuel's possession.”

Magnus stared at this soft-hearted man in front of him in amazement. Alec had only met Edward a handful of times and already, Alec was hurting for the warlock. How was it possible for a Shadowhunter to act like Alec and what were the odds that kind of person to be willing to be Magnus’s? The warlock’s lips tugged in a smile, wondering for a countless time how someone like Alec fell for someone like him. Jace, on the other hand, simply sighed, understanding Alec so well that he simply wrapped his arm around Alec, pulling his _parabatai_ closer fondly. “If that’s what you want, then, I’m going to stay here.” Jace said. “You’re shit without my awesome power, anyway.”

Alec elbowed Jace’s ribs in mock anger.

They stayed around for a few more minutes and nothing Alec did seemed to trigger any vision. He had touched almost all of the symbols within the circle, walked back and forth across the circle and ran his hands through the nearby cave walls. But there was nothing. Nothing at all. Frustration began to build within him.

“Alec, as much as I love watching you fondling the cave walls, I don’t think your method is working,” Jace remarked drily. His hands were crossed lazily across his chest as he leaned against a huge boulder.

Alec glared at Jace. Jace being unhelpful was nothing new, but inside he agreed with the blond Shadowhunter. This was a futile exercise.

“You know,” Magnus spoke up thoughtfully. “I have an idea. There’s one place that we haven’t really checked.”

“Where’s that?” Alec asked curiously.

“Edward’s residence.”

“Magnus, the Clave has sent people there. They tried to find any clue of where Samuel could have set up his summoning circles and they found nothing relevant. Well, except Edward was a neat freak and his fashion sense was stuck in 19th century.” Jace reminded.

“Exactly,” Magnus said. “ _Shadowhunters_ were the ones searching through a warlock’s residence. You don’t know where to search anyway. Warlocks are very inventive in hiding things that we don’t want people to snoop around.” With that, Magnus waved his hands to open another portal. “Come on.”

Jace and Alec looked at each other before entering into the portal. They came out right in front of Edward’s front door. A second later, Magnus followed after them and the portal was closed behind them. “Shall we?” Magnus asked.

“Do you know where to look, Magnus?” Alec said as they walked through Edward’s house.

Magnus entered into one of the rooms and stood still. “Not yet. You see, warlocks can hide an entire room from anybody. It’s a normal practice; almost all warlocks do this. For me, I hide my stillroom from public viewing. It’s a bad business letting people see where I keep all my inventories.”

“But I can see your stillroom, Magnus. It is not hidden.” Alec frowned.

Magnus smiled softly at Alec. “That’s because I have ordered all my wards and glamours to make an exception for you. It’s always been like that. I can't risk you stumbling upon one of my wards and got you hurt, can I?” Alec could feel his cheeks grow warm, unable to hide his happiness at the trust and care Magnus put into him.

“So, how are you going to unhide Edward’s secret room?” Jace asked.

“The spot where I am standing right now is the exact centre of this building. I am going to spread my dispelling magic throughout the area while also detecting any magic that disappears due to any success in removing Edward’s glamour. Usually other warlocks’ wards are not that easy to dispel but since I can’t feel any trace of Edward’s magic anymore. I imagine any ward Edward put up would be weak by now.”

Alec nodded his head; his heart ached in sorrow when he heard Magnus was practically declaring Edward was dead. He and Jace stepped back to give Magnus room to work.

Magnus waved his hands in graceful, circular motions, and the magic began to spark out, as his cat-eyes made their appearance like they usually did whenever the warlock was about to use a substantial amount of his magic. Electric yellow energy crackled out of Magnus’s hands, outstretched in the opposite sides, and it was shot out in all directions. Magnus held on his position for a few moments as his magic slithered all over Edward’s house. Jace and Alec watched Magnus in his element - awe was clearly on their faces as always. It was hard not to; Magnus had always had his signature flair when using magic and it was immensely attractive.

“Huh…” Magnus spoke up eventually and a second later, he diffused his magic. “There’s something on the second floor. I can’t dispel whatever magic it is.”

“A hidden room?” Alec asked hopefully.

“I don’t think so, Alexander. It doesn’t feel like a room. And the energy doesn’t feel like wards or glamours.” However, seeing the fallen faces of the _parabatai_ pair, Magnus hastily added, “But let’s just go and see what it is.”

When they went upstairs, they were all stunned to see a permanent portal hidden behind a weakened ward that Magnus had dispelled. It was the same kind of portal that every Institute had. “Well, this is unexpected.” Jace remarked.

“And useless,” Magnus added. “Permanent portal has only one specific destination. If the destination is some place irrelevant to what we’re looking for, then, we’re back at square one.”

“But we can still use it to go to other places, right? I mean the destination isn’t always fixed.” Alec asked.

“The magic is there and only the warlock who set up the portal it in the first can change its destination. Before you asked me, I cannot change it, even though I can’t imagine why would you want me to since we don’t know where Samuel is. Why do you ask, Alexander?”

Alec bit his lips as he was thinking of his options. Samuel had said something about a _Receptorem_ having an ability to redirect portal to a destination according to his vision. Magnus said something about Edward’s magic still being intact. So, if he had the vision of Samuel summoning _Anzu_ and paid attention to it this time, theoretically speaking, he could redirect the portal to where Samuel was and bypass whatever portal ward Samuel/Edward had put up around the area.

Alec got closer to the portal as he tentatively felt the wall behind the portal. This time it felt different. It was as if there was an unknown force within him that urged him to do something, so, he gave in to his instinct and began to gingerly hold his hand out to touch the wavy portal.

“Alec, what are you doing?” Jace asked warily.  There was something about the way Alec's eyes suddenly turned blank and unseeing, that caused Jace to feel uneasy. Alec looked like he was being taken over by something else; like his actions were being guided. Whenever his _parabatai_ got into one of those trances, Jace’s concern shot off the roof.

“I don’t know, I just thought-” Alec’s distracted words were immediately halted as the long-awaited vision swooped down unexpectedly. The arrival of the vision brought the usual gripping pain in his head and the sightlessness in his eyes as a sharp, stark vision was plunged into his head. He might have waited for this vision but by the grace of Heaven, he wasn’t prepared for it and the excruciating pain that it brought along. “ _Shit…_ ” Alec gasped loudly as he instinctively reached for his _parabatai_ for support. He could feel the beginning of a nosebleed. One of these days, Jace wouldn't be here and Alec would end up bleeding to death from his nose, he just knew it. “ _Jace_ …”

Jace’s eyes widened in surprise when he saw Alec was being unexpectedly bombarded by the vision so suddenly that he stumbled clumsily forwards to Alec to catch him, but Magnus beat him to it; clearly the warlock was more attuned to Alec’s predicament than him and caught Alec before his knees failed him.

“Alexander!” Magnus cried and huffed as he brought Alec’s weight slowly down to the ground. At the sight of the first trickle of blood from Alec’s nose caused Magnus to curse loudly. “Damn it! Jace, come on! What are you waiting for!” Jace snapped out of his thoughts and quickly yanked down Alec’s collar down and then, slid down his hand across Alec shoulder. Less than a minute later, the _Virtutis_ rune was activated and Magnus felt the familiar reaction from Alec as the dark-haired Shadowhunter received Jace’s energy.  

As soon as the _Virtutis_ rune activated, it was then, Magnus - for the first time - felt the _Anima_ rune on his chest pulsed and glowed in response of the _Virtutis_ rune. But Magnus felt nothing; he didn’t feel any of his lifespan being drained or being sucked out of him. He just felt the rune pulsed and then… nothing. For one scary, breathless moment he thought that the _Anima_ rune didn’t work, that he couldn’t help Alec after all, and panic began to fill him. But then, suddenly, Magnus recalled Clary’s words saying that his lifespan would only be used when the _Virtutis_ rune was activated outside visions - when it was being used to transform Alec into an Angel, and Magnus took a long, ragged breath in intense relief.  

In Magnus’s arms, Alec slowly unclenched his fists and relaxed his body when the pain that was gripping his head suddenly disappeared as soon as the _Anima_ rune on his own chest came alive, glowing and pulsing with comforting hums of life-force. It never occured to Alec’s mind that this rune was also able to take away this excruciating pain that he had always dreaded. Was it because now the vision was being borne by two different souls - one mortal and the other is immortal - that the pain was being absorbed instead of being endured? Whatever the reason was, Alec was so thankful. He was _so, so thankful_ . _Oh Angels.._ Alec thought; relief washed over him like tidal waves at the disappearance of the pain that he could cry. _Thank you, thank you._   

“Alexander?” Magnus asked in deep concern when he saw a drop of delicate tear slither down from one of Alec's eyes even though his expression was smooth and no longer contorted in deep pain. It was as if Alec had just finished with his vision but that was impossible because shouldn't he be in pain? But the tell-tale sign of blueish colour in Alec’s eyes told Magnus that Alec was still seeing the vision. “Jace? What’s happening?”

Jace raised his glowing golden eyes to meet Magnus’s; confusion was on his face as well. Just like Alec, Jace’s expression was also void from any strain and hardship. “I don’t know, Magnus, but our _Virtutis_ rune feels a lot more balanced and controllable. It felt natural and not... I don’t know… _rushed_ like it usually does _._ All I know that it works; the _Anima_ rune works,” Jace whispered reverently- his eyes were swimming with tears. “Oh… thank Angels… thank you…”

At that admission, Magnus pulled Alec closer to him with a wide, tremulous smile on his face. _He did this_. He took away the pain from Alec and that knowledge gave him untold happiness. He rested his cheek on top of Alec’s head, giving thanks to the Heaven for every painless breath that Alec drew in, as he waited for Alec to come back to him. This was what he wanted; to ease Alec's path and to share the burden.

The vision eventually let up as the blue irises vanished from Alec’s eyes. Alec let out a long, soft sigh at Magnus’s throat, savouring the feeling of safety within his lover’s arms for a short while, before he opened his mouth. “Jace… It’s over. You can stop the rune now.”

Jace abruptly took away his hand and watched his best friend languidly pulled away from Magnus in immense awe. There were no traces of fatigue or pain in his body movement and Alec didn’t seem like he was going to keel over anytime soon. If this was how Alec was supposed to receive his visions all along, Jace knew that from now on, he would never, ever let Alec have another vision without _Virtutis_ rune even if it meant being close to Alec until they died.

“Are you alright?” Magnus asked gently; his eyes searching for any hint of illness. Alec’s head was gently cradled within his hands.

“I felt no pain.” The wonder was clear in Alec’s voice as he looked at Magnus. “Magnus… there was no pain at all. When Jace activated the _Virtutis_ rune, I saw the vision so clearly and then, when the _Anima_ rune was activated as well, the pain simply went away.”

Alrc swallowed down the lump in his throat. Gratitude filled his heart the the sight of two most important persons in his life; he was keenly aware that nothing he could do in his life would ever repay their sacrifice to him. “Thank you, Magnus… thanks Jace.”

Magnus and Jace grinned so brightly at the sheer happiness in Alec's face. At this very moment- this look of elation on Alec's face, was worth of all the sacrifices and heartaches and tears that they have all shed in order to get at this point.

Without wasting any time, Alec got on his feet carefully, still marvelling at the unexpected lack of pain and tiredness that usually came from the aftermath of a vision. Jace and Magnus quickly got their feet as well. Alec looked straight into the portal, trying to remember the details of the place that he just saw in his vision and spoke quietly. “When I first saw Samuel, he told me that, as a _Receptorem_ , I have to ability to redirect any portal towards the destination of my vision. That was how I managed to get to the first cave; I, somehow, redirected Edward’s portal to Samuel's summoning site and not be blocked by Samuel's wards because he and Edward are the same person and therefore, the same magic. So, I thought of using the same thing: Edward’s magic and portal-” Alec signed at the portal. “-and my vision as the navigation to Samuel.” And he pointed at his temple. “I should be able to bypass any ward put up by Samuel, if there’s any.”

Then, Alec held out his hands towards both Magnus and Jace, asking them to hold his hands. “Are you sure, Alec?” Jace asked warily, but he still reached back to Alec and grasped his hand tightly as Magnus reached back to Alec’s other hand. The trust that the three of them had in each other was absolute.

Alec tightened both of his hands around Magnus and Jace's. He took a deep breath, concentrating on the vision and gathering his courage as he said, “I've only done this once and it was unintentional, but I'm fairly sure I know what I'm doing.”

“That's good enough for me, Alexander.”

“Yeah, me too, buddy.”

With deep breaths, all three of them stepped into the portal.

* * * * *

The moment they stepped out of the portal, everything started happening so fast that they barely had any time to react.

The first thing that Alec saw was a small horde of demons and a huge pool of the demon ichor. Then, when Jace and Magnus followed suit and came out from the portal, Alec shifted his gaze and widened to see Samuel stood beside a freshly drawn summoning circle; his hands swung in circular motions- the circle glowed in deep red. The earth trembled as it cracked open like a big yawn. It took Alec a second to understand the situation in front of him.

_Samuel was opening the rift!_

“Samuel!” Alec shouted, his heart raced.

The tall warlock snapped his head in utter surprise at Alec. He wasn’t expected anyone to find him here. _How the hell does he find me this quick? This place is warded!_ The pair of icy blue eyes widened before narrowed down in anger. _There is no way he can redirect Magnus’s portal to here. My ward would have blocked them!_  He had no answers but instead of mulling over this, Samuel regained his composure and started to pour his magic even more in an attempt to open the summoning rift even wider.

“We need to stop him!” Magnus yelled and all three of them rushed towards Samuel.

Samuel snarled, deeply angry at the interruption. The angels were siccing their _Virtutis_ pair on him like a pack of hunting dogs and they were indeed a pain in his ass. He immediately released one of his hands to push his magic into the demons around him, ordering them to charge towards the intruders while he used his other hand to keep feeding into the summoning rift. At the sight of a small horde of demons rushing towards them, Jace pulled out his Seraph Blade, Alec nocked his arrow, aiming at one of the demons and Magnus clenched his hands to call upon his magic. Magnus was silently impressed at how Samuel was able to use two different magic at the same time. That took a lot of magic and experience.

Jace swung his Seraph Blade at the nearest demons as arrows flied passed by his ears in deadly accuracy towards the surrounding demons. Magnus ducked and blasted a demon, but his eyes widened in fear as he saw the summoning rift split open bigger and bigger. If they didn’t do anything soon, Samuel would certainly succeed in calling out _Anzu_.

“Alec, Jace, you need to get there and stop Samuel,” Magnus said, ducking another swipe of claws.  

Jace turned his head to Magnus, “And let you handle the demons alone?” The disbelief in his voice was apparent.

“No way!” Alec snapped. His let out another arrow but the way his eyebrows drew closer indicated how much he hated Magnus’s plan. “We stick together!”

Magnus was impatient. “Look! Look at Samuel! He’s almost finished opening the rift and we are only three people. We’re not equipped for this!”

Alec and Jace exchanged a grim look, knowing that Magnus was right.

“Go. Now!” Magnus ordered. “I’ll keep the demons occupied here, but both of you must deal with Samuel! Only a _Virtutis_ pair can close the rift. Don’t worry about me. A dozen of small demons is a small matter to me. I’ve handled worse.”

Jace’s face turned resolute before tugging reluctant Alec away from the demons. “Come on, Alec. Let’s go!”

“But…” Alec started but one look at Magnus’s face got Alec’s feet moved with Jace’s. “Be careful, Magnus, please.” Alec implored.

“I will! Now, go! And for the love of God, don’t let _Anzu_ out!” Magnus said and swallowed hard when he saw Alec nod his head- his heart was heavy with worry for Alec as well.

Samuel eyed the incoming _parabatai_ pair, with their faces tightened with wrath from Heaven. He knew that he couldn’t complete the opening of the summoning rift in time unless he used both of his hands. But that would mean letting go the control he had over the demons that he had ordered to attack the intruders, which in turn, meant the demons might turn on him as well. The ancient warlock eyed the demons swarming around the High Warlock of Brooklyn- so skill and graceful in his movement as he charged his fiery red magic. There was no doubt Magnus Bane earned his title.

A shot of uneasy feeling surfaced within him and Samuel aggressively pushed down the remnant of Edward’s consciousness back to the mental prison. He had thought that Edward’s soul would be totally swallowed down by now, but apparently, Edward was fighting viciously for his body that it was almost impressive if it wasn’t so troublesome. Coming up with a decision, Samuel released his magic from the demons- Magnus would distract the demons while he would devote all of his magic to open the rift faster.

Alec’s eyes widened in alarm as he saw the rift was splitting open in an alarming rate. “Jace! Stop Samuel!” He shouted as he drew up his bow and pulled at the arrows. He aimed at Samuel’s head and released the shot.

Samuel cursed loudly as he released one hand deflect the arrow.

Alec narrowed his eyes and he quickly reloaded his arrows to shoot at Samuel again and again only to have them deflected again and again. He needed to make sure the ritual was slowed down until Jace reached Samuel close enough to engage fight with him.

The black-haired warlock could read Alec strategy well enough. _You think you can slow me down. You don’t know what I am capable of._ He thought viciously. With one hand still trying to open the rift, he muttered a spell under his breath and immediately a wall of energy-like barrier shot up between him and Alec.

It was so unexpected. The arrow that Alec let go a little too late hit the barrier and the barrier trembled as it caused the arrow to shoot back at Alec. Stunned, Alec dived sideway, and the arrow sliced through the soft flesh of his stomach, narrowly avoiding fatal places. _Damn it!_ Alec gasped as he grasped at his bleeding side.

Samuel smirked at the sight of the blood and he returned both of his hands to open the rift. _Just a little bit more..._

Jace wasn’t aware any of this. His focus was to reach Samuel- to stop the ritual in any way possible. “SAMUEL!” He yelled, fury in his voice.

The earth began to shake as the rift reaching its final stage. Echoes of a beast’s unnatural growls and roars could be heard as it was a distance away. Alec pushed himself to stand up, unminding his bleeding side. The sound from the deep underground chilled him to the core- Edward was right, Alec thought- the sound was not something to be forgotten. Despite the fear building inside of him, Alec forced himself to run towards Samuel but growled in frustration at the barrier erected by Samuel. Damn it! He needed to stop the creature.

Jace took out his Seraph blade. The trembling ground beneath his feet and that... hideous sound were the warning that Samuel was finishing his task. Jace knew he couldn’t afford to waste any time. With a yell, he swung his blade towards Samuel, forcing the warlock let go the task and blast his magic to deflect Jace’s attack. Jace didn’t allow the warlock any chance to regroup himself- he found his feet quickly and lunged forward to keep the pressure of his attacks on Samuel.

Samuel didn’t expect Jace to bypass his magical barrier and therefore, didn’t expect the flurry of relentless attacks from the furious Shadowhunter. The magic he conjured up again and again to defend himself from Jace’s attacks was stuttering and clumsy. The attacks were too fast for Samuel to keep up. Jace saw the opportunity to hurt Samuel, so he pressed his attacks closer and closer until there was an opening and Jace skilfully grabbed a small dagger he hid in his belt, swinging around to evade an awry magic, and stabbed it deep into Samuel’s shoulder.

Samuel yelled in pain and he blasted out a desperate attack at Jace. Jace barely avoided the attack by jumping out of the warlock’s range of attack. The warlock grabbed at his shoulder, hissed when he found the seraph blade was embedded too deep to be pulled right now.

“That is for attacking my _parabatai_ that day,” Jace snarled, fire in his mismatched eyes. “No one touches Alec without his and my permission!”

Samuel panted in pain and exertion as he staggered a few steps backwards. He knew he had no chance fighting close range with this Shadowhunter and he was clearly outnumbered. He needed to get away from here; he didn’t expect Jace Herondale to be this skilful of a fighter. Fighting hand-to-hand with him made Samuel realise how outclassed he was. This was a fight that he couldn’t win alone.

And he was so close to complete the ritual.

He quickly formulated a new strategy. Sometimes, to retreat was a way towards victory. He learned that a thousand years ago when he threw himself over the cliff, just so he could fight another day. He began to secretly push out his magic with his injured hand behind his back.

“And I plan to do more than that!” Samuel snarled, distracting Jace from his growing magic. “How are you going to keep him safe, Jace Herondale? And what becomes of a _parabatai_ pair without the half of the partnership?”

Fear built within Jace like a cold, sharp ice-shard at the threat. Nothing scared him more than the prospect of living without his other soul. “NO!” Jace roared as he lunged forwards once again- anger propelled the Shadowhunter.

Samuel jerked back away from Jace, forcing his one wounded hand to push out his magic towards the rift, finishing the opening of the portal. The rift groaned and widened, and the sound of the unimaginable beast became so loud. Jace halted in utter surprise at the grotesque sound; the earth beneath him shook unmistakably. The chasm had stopped widening and Jace knew that Samuel had finished opening the rift. Panic began to fill him.

The black-haired warlock gripped the leaking wound on his shoulder as he shakily retreated. He knew that he couldn’t face the _Parabatai_ pair and their warlock’s companion on his own. He had to retreat. And the threat of _Anzu_ would be enough to deter them from following him. He needed time to recuperate his magic and to heal the deep wound on his shoulder. Injuries made by the Seraph Blade would take days to recover.

“What’s going to be, Jace?” Samuel said tauntingly. “Are you going to keep chasing me or are you going to close the rift?”

The trembling of the earth worsening and from behind him, he could hear Alec and Magnus yell at him, asking him for something but the growling and the trembling were making it hard for Jace to hear it. Only Angels knew how badly he wanted to chase after the warlock - to finish this once and for all - but he also knew that within a minute, _Anzu_ would be let loose.

And Alec couldn’t close the portal without him.

Gritting his teeth in fury, he stood still as he watched Samuel use the last of his magic to open the portal behind him.

“Wise choice,” Samuel smirked, and the portal swallowed him. Jace snarled in return.

“Jace! Jace!” Alec called from behind. Taking a huge, calming breath, Jace turned around and saw Magnus and Alec ran towards- the magical barrier set up by Samuel was gone as the caster had left the area. His eyes widened when he saw blood stain on Alec’s side.

“Are you hurt?!” Jace demanded. Did that warlock manage to injure Alec?

“What?” Alec was startled at the vehement in Jace’s voice.

“This?!” Jace touched Alec’s side carefully- a stark contrast with his harsh tone. “Did that bastard get you?”

“Oh, that,” Alec said dismissively. “It’s a minor wound. But we have a bigger problem to address.”

Magnus frowned at Jace’s word because he, too, wasn’t aware of Alec’s bleeding side. Swallowing his panic tirade, Magnus carefully slid his hand underneath Alec’s shirt, hissed softly at the sight of the red, swollen and bleeding skin, and hovered his hand over the wound. He ignored Alec’s protest - _Magnus, I’m fine!_ \- and let the magic closed the gaping skin. The magic tickled slowly as the fight he had over with demons left him quite depleted. Jace nodded gratefully at the warlock’s action.

“We need to close the rift,” Alec said instead when he realised Magnus would heal him anyway; his body tensed at the feel of Magnus’s healing magic flowed into him. Healing hurt.

“Damn... “ Jace breathed as he peered into the chasm. “I’m going to have nightmare over that sound.” A look of fear in Alec and Magnus’s face indicated that they agreed with Jace’s statement.

Alec’s eyes widened when he saw something was flying towards the opening. “Jace, come on! Let’s close this!” Jace shared Alec’s urgency and quickly placed his hand on Alec’s _Virtutis_ rune. When the rune was activated, all the familiar feelings rushed through the _parabatai_ pair. Immediately, Alec and Magnus’s _Anima_ rune came alive in tandem with _Virtutis_ rune. The rune on Magnus’s chest pulsed in a loud hum of energy, readying itself to be used by the _Receptorem._

When Jace and Alec first used the _Virtutis_ rune outside the visions, Alec’s transformation was incomplete- halted by his inability to receive all of Jace’s overwhelming power. Now, with all players were in place; the provider of power and the provider of life stood beside the receiver, Alec began his ascension towards being an Angel. The surging power within him was indescribable but it felt _right_ and _controllable_ , which was unlike the last time they tried this and therefore, Alec allowed the power to build and build without fear.

A bright, warm golden light began to surround Alec and his eyes turned into a complete set of electric blue, making him appeared ethereal and otherworldly. The ground surrounding the trio lightened up with the same gold light, cradling them all in a protective embrace. Magnus staggered a few steps back as he watched in complete awe at Alec’s transformation. _His lover is the most beautiful thing that he had ever seen._ He knew the moment the ascension was complete by the total change in Alec’s eyes and how those startling eyes saw something _beyond_ mortal. The sight caused _Anime_ rune on Magnus’s chest felt warm and incredibly good and all that Magnus wanted now was to assist the Angel in front of him in any way he could.

As if the manual on how to cast protection over the rift was downloaded into his head, Alec was guided to raise his hands over the rift, steadily pushing the Angel Power over the rift. The chasm started to pull together, closing the entrance, muffling the screeching, angry sounds of the beast beneath. The power needed to accomplish this was astounding and Alec could feel his body began to protest over the overloading of power transferred from Jace to him. And then, something strange appeared in Alec’s immortal eyes.

It was like a thick thread, illuminating in blue light, connecting him to Magnus. As the Angel Power began crushing him, Alec unwittingly reached out for Magnus for support and the blue light began to pulse along the thread towards him. _Instantly he knew_. He knew he could control over how much Magnus’s life-force he had taken- how much of Magnus’s immortality he had compromised.

Despite the dire situation in front of him, Alec felt an immense rush of intense protectiveness over the warlock. The life thread in front of him seemed too fragile to be belonged to the magnificent Magnus. That thought caused Alec to bite his lips- his blue eyes stared at the thread as he reached into decision. No matter what Magnus had said about his willingness to sacrifice his immortality for Alec, now that Alec knew he could control this, he couldn’t make himself to hurt the man he loved more than his life.

Alec closed his eyes, taking Magnus’s life-force just enough to make the Angel Power controllable and allowed his body and soul to bear the rest of the crushing energy. The rift drew close, Jace poured more of his power into Alec, and Alec gritted his teeth as he tried to complete his attempt underneath the unbelievable strain. Immediately, blood began to pour out of his nose and ears and gasps of pain escaped through his clenched mouth.

Magnus saw the blood and, judging how he felt nothing but a steady hum on his rune, he knew- he _freaking knew_ what Alec was doing. Rage and possessiveness consumed him instantly. How dare Alec did this?! Didn’t he know that he belonged to Magnus? Heart, body and soul? And now, he went out and did this? “ALEC! ALEC! Take my life, DAMN IT!”

Alec glanced at Magnus. Pain blurred his vision.  Alec could see the utter rage in Magnus’s cat eyes. But even then, he couldn’t hurt Magnus. He didn’t know how to make himself do that. _Just a little bit more._ Alec thought light-headedly. _I can hold on, just a little bit more…_

Magnus rushed in front of Alec. The _Anima_ rune allowed Magnus to pass through the protective energy barrier erected whenever _Virtutis_ rune was activated, recognising him as part of the group. Immediately, Magnus ducked beneath Alec’s upright hands - still trying to close the rift - and stood in front of Alec’s glazing eyes. He forced Alec’s electric blue eyes to look away from whatever transcending sight he was looking at and to focus on his own cat eyes.

It took a second before Alec’s eyes met Magnus’s.

With both of Magnus’s hands cradling Alec’s face, he used his fingers to wipe away the flowing blood; his anger diminished like a wind. His heart was breaking instead because his love for Alec always triumphed over his rage. He dropped his voice into pleading whisper, “Alexander, darling, please, please, don’t do this. Take my life. This is why I am here. I’ve an eternity to spare, what’s a few years of my life-force? Stop being stupid!”

Alec looked back his lover for a few silent moments. “I… I don’t know how to hurt you…” Alec whispered back. His voice was deep and inhuman in his Angel form but the soft eyes - even in a different colour - were all his Alexander.

Tears rushed into Magnus’s eyes. He had never felt this protected in his long, long life. The love he felt for Alec built and expanded until he couldn’t breathe. So, if Alec didn’t care about his own life, Magnus was going to make Alec save Magnus’s life. He took a deep breath and said, “Yes, you do. And you’re going to take my life-force because didn’t we bind our souls together? If you die, _darling_ , you can be sure that I’ll follow you.”

Alec’s eyes widened in utter shock at the threat- _no_ \- Alec realised at the hard stare Magnus gave him, it was promise. Magnus vowed to make his sacrifice a pointless one. Swallowing hard, Alec nodded his head slowly.

A few seconds later, with his hands still on Alec, Magnus could finally, finally feel the _Anima_ rune writhe and felt something deep within him was being pulled towards Alec. There was only a small, almost intangible twinge in his heart- not painful but certainly unmistakable. At the feel of his life-force being tentatively drained, a huge wave of relief washed over the warlock. It was ironic, really, to be relieved at the feel of someone taking away his lifespan. But love certainly motivated people to do the craziest thing.

And there was no one he loved more than Alexander.

Gradually, he could see the strain left Alec’s face and the blood had stopped and the rift was being closed at a much faster rate. Jace’s abnormal Shadowhunter’s energy was always meant to be borne with two souls.

Ten minutes since Jace had put his hand on Alec, the rift was finally closed. Jace pulled away his hand; his knees weakened, and he crumpled wearily on the ground. And Alec, without the hand of his _Dantis,_ slowly returned to his normal form with his eyes turned back into their usual hazel colour. The loss of blood and the exertion of trying to close the rift without Magnus’s life-force caused the tall Shadowhunter to feel so lightheaded and weak.

If it wasn’t for Magnus’s strong hands supporting Alec’s body, he would have keeled forwards. Magnus gently brought Alec down to rest on the ground and laid Alec’s head on his shoulder.  

Magnus let a few resting, silent minutes between all three of them. The fact that he had helped Alec brought such an untold peace in his heart. “Next time, Alexander,” Magnus spoke up, breaking the silence. “Please don’t be an idiot.”

Jace snorted out an undignified laughter.

Alec’s face grew hot in embarrassment. But he hid his face in Magnus’s neck, smiling widely and said, “Deal.”


End file.
